


Lost Bird

by denna5



Category: Dark Knight Rises (2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Brainwashing, F/M, M/M, Memory Loss, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-01-15
Updated: 2014-03-08
Packaged: 2017-11-25 14:05:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 34
Words: 90,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/639645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/denna5/pseuds/denna5
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An au with a lot of the movie elements. </p>
<p>John Blake does not remember much from his childhood, sometimes he has dreams of a girl calling him John Bird and a man with kind eyes but most of his face hidden, and he feels a connection with Bruce Wayne, one that is more than he is aware of.  </p>
<p>This is a story where john was found by Talia when they were both children and what happens later.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I prompted this but it won't leave me alone so I am trying to write it myself. It will be strange but hopefully someone will enjoy it.   
> Here is the link for the prompt for those who want to see it  
> http://tdkr-kink.livejournal.com/3076.html?thread=2459908#t2459908

Talia remembers stories about the world from when she was younger and still in the pit. Some she knows were made up but others were the truth but sounded like they could not be real. She remembers Bane telling her about all the wonders of the world that he had heard about. He himself had not seen much of the world as he had been placed in the pit as a child. There had been books, pictures of things that one day Talia would be able to see. She had been so excited to see all the beauty that the world outside the pit had to offer.

There is nothing beautiful about Gothom. It is bigger than the pit, perhaps even cleaner, but there does not seem to be much beauty. It seems a dark place to Talia despite all the light. Her father has told her that this place is bad and she believes him. It will fall someday, he told her, but not yet. There was much that would need to be done before Gothom could have its’ reckoning.

Talia wonders the streets of this place. She had snuck off, it was not hard for her to slip away from those who are supposed to watch her. Her father will not approve but she feels like there is something here that she is supposed to find. She knows that most would find this unsafe, a ten year old girl walking the streets by herself, but Talia is not ordinary. She has to adjust to the way people treated her up here. In the pit, she could trust no one but Bane, her friend and protector. She is lonely without him. He has been her constant since she was born and the world feels strange with out him by her side. Father has promised to get him soon, for now Talia has to wait. 

She is in an alley near what she was told was called an orphanage. Talia could tell what it was, a place for unwanted children , children who have no one. That could have been Talia in the pit if not for her mother briefly and Bane. She had asked Bane why he took care of her, she knows that he did not have to. He had looked at her with a small smile on his face. “ Because you are smaller than me.” The answer had made her giggle. He looked at her then, his face very serious. “ There are few things in this pit that are innocent or beautiful, you are the only one and so I must keep you safe.” Talia is still not sure if she understands the second part of his answer. The thought of Bane makes her hurt so she continues her exploration and tries to not think of him right now. 

It is still light out but the alley is very shaded and if Talia had not been used to the dark in the pit she may have been afraid. It is winter and the chill in the air does brother Talia a bit. The pit had been hot most of the time. She warps her arms around herself when she notices another figure in the alleyway that sees her then hides behind some of the dumpsters. Talia knows it was a child and she is curious about why they are by themselves. As she makes her way to the space behind the dumpsters , the child tries to run past her, but Talia is very fast and it is nothing to stop them and make them go down to the ground and she sits on top of them her light weight pinning them down. It is a boy and he is smaller than Talia and his body seems to shake but she knows it is not from fear but rather he is very angry. His eyes stare up at her and she thinks they are the only beautiful thing she has seen in Gothom. “ Where are you going?”, she asks him , wanting to know why he is in this alley alone. He looks for a moment that he wants to not answer her but he can not get her to let go and so he spits the words at her. “ St. Swithin’s.” She knows that name. 

“ Why are you going there? Do you not have a family?” He looks like her words hurt him witch is not what she wants, she just wants to know why he is here. “ I did but they are dead and everyone wants me to forget about it and I’m going to be sent back there again and I just don’t want to be sent away so I thought I would just go back now and not have to worry about it.” His words come out in a rush and Talia is not sure what they mean exactly except for the fact that he is alone with no one to care for him. She remembers Bane’s words about why he took care of her as she looks at the boy’s face. 

“ What is your name?” She needs something to call him. “ John, well Robin but I don’t like being called that.” He is looking at her strangely and she looks at him just as strangely when he gives her a name that she knows that some birds are called. “ You are not a bird. You are much too big and I do not think you can fly. I like John . I am Talia.” She can tell he has not heard that name before. She gets up off of him and offers her hand to help him up. He takes it after a moment. She looks him over and brushes some of the dirt off of him. She will take care of him now; there is no reason for him to go back to where the other unwanted children are. She wants him and that is all that matters right now. “You can come with me. I will not hurt you. You are smaller, I will look after you, John bird.” She adds the bird to the end of his name as almost a tease. He looks at her like he is not sure that he can believe her. “I only have my father and soon my protector again but I will share them with you, you do not have to be alone.” She offers her hand and she can see him thinking. He gives her a small smile and takes her hand. He is still unsure but Talia pulls him close to her and starts to walk with him. They make their way back to Talia’s father and she feels a little less alone with him beside her. She still misses her protector but now she has something to protect while she waits for Bane. He will be proud of her.

 

*^*^*^*^*  
John is tired of being angry, tired of being sent away. He is tired of people saying they will take care of him and then they don’t. He knows he used to have a family, a mother and a father but it has been a while since they were all together. He barely remembers his mother, knows she died but he can not remember how it happened. He just knows that after his dad was not the same. There were bad people around them all the time and John remembers his father’s death better. Nothing was done about it , not really, and John was sent to a different family soon after. 

That had been when he was about five and a half and now he was seven and he has been with five different families and the boy’s home and he knows that is where he will be sent tomorrow. Everyone keeps expecting him to forgot about what happened , but he can’t. He had tried but when he closes his eyes he sees it. He thought this last time would be different but he had heard them talking downstairs about how it just wasn’t working. John knew what that meant and so he ran.

He knew the way to St. Swithin’s. It should not have taken him very long but in the alley he had seen someone else. He had tried to hide from them and then run past them but it had done no good and he found himself pinned to the ground. He was waiting to be hit but the hit didn’t come, instead she asked him questions. He could tell that she was a girl even though her hair was only a little longer than his and she seemed very different from any other girl he had met. When he told her that his name was really Robin and not John, he expected her to tease him, instead she had just looked confused and told him he was not a bird. Her own name sounded strange but pretty, just like her he thought. She had gotten up before he could tell her this and helped him up. She brushed dirt off of him, almost fussing over him. It was strange and not something John was used to but it is kind of nice , makes him feel like she cares. She says she will take care of him, calls him John Bird. He is not sure he should trust her.

There is something about the way she talks to him, she is a little older than him but seems more grown up and younger all at the same time. He takes her hand, he knows that more than likely he will be sent back to St. Swithin’s once Talia bores of him in a few moments, but it will not hurt him to walk with her. She shivers more than he does even though her own cloths look warmer than his. He walks closer to her to help keep her warm and she does not seem to mind his body being so close to hers. As they walk, she talks to him, asks him questions. He likes talking to her but he is worried when she talks about her father. Her father already has Talia and John knows that some people do not want very many kids, particularly kids that are not theirs and are angry all the time. 

They reach her father and he knows that she was not supposed to be in that alley. Her father looks angry and relieved all at once when he sees her. John knows now that he will not want John to stay with her but he does not want to leave her. Her father seems to not notice him, instead he is looking Talia over, telling her she needs to not wonder off. He finally notices John and his eyes look him over and John will not look away from him even if his eyes scare him a bit but he also does not let go of Talia’s hand. He knows that soon he will be sent away and he wants to hold onto her for as long as he can. 

“ What is your name?”, her father asks and his voice is firm but sounds more curious right now then angry. “ Robin John Blake.” He knows the man wants his full name and he can hear Talia stifle a little giggle at the word Robin again. “ Where are your parents, Robin?” Talia starts to say something but John answers before she can. “Dead, sir.” He adds the sir to be polite. He does not want to get into anymore trouble than he has to. 

“ He is going to the place for the unwanted children but I want him so there is no need for him to be there and I will take care of him.” Talia’s words come out as if there will be no argument about it. She pulls John closer to her when she says all this and warps her arms around him. Her pulling him close makes him feel safe but he knows that the decision about whether he can stay is not hers. 

“ Talia, we will be leaving soon. Gothom is his home, he may not want to leave.” What he says it true , Gothom is John’s home but he has no one here. “Your home can be with me John Bird.” She says this to him softly and the look in her father’s eyes seems different. “ Do you want to stay with Talia, Robin? We will not return here for a while once we leave, you may not be able to come back. I will give you the choice now and if you wish to leave, you can come with us. You can decide by morning, for now we will go back to where we have been staying.” John is surprised by Talia’s father’s words. He has never been given a choice about where he stays. 

That night, he stays with them. They eat , he finds out that Talia’s father’s name is Ra’s Al Ghoul witch sounds funny, and Talia tells him about the pit, about Bane. Talia lies in bed with him that night and he feels warmer than he has in a long time. The next morning , they leave and John goes with them holding onto Talia the whole time. 

*^*^*^*^*


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this part is a bit fluffy. Hopefully it is not so sugary that it can't be enjoyed.

*^*^*^*^*  
It took some time for her John Bird to get used to his new life. He had never been outside of Gothom and everything seemed different to him when they left the city. It is different for Talia as well. In the pit she had been the protected and now she is the protector. It was difficult looking out for another. The short time she had been out of the pit but before she had found her father, she only had herself to depend on and take care of. She supposes that her father takes care of them both now but John is hers and she wants to take care of him the best she can. 

He is sweeter than her in some ways, more innocent she thinks as well. He is angry sometimes. There is rage in him, a rage Talia knows well as she feels it just like John. The fury of a child who has lost much. She had told him of the pit that night in Gothom and he in turn told her of his father’s death. They understood each other in a way that most would not. It was then that Talia knew she would not let him stay in Gothom even if he chooses to. She wanted him with her and she would make sure that he was by her side. She did not have to force him, he came willingly the next day. 

For a while, it seemed he worried that he would be sent away. Talia would never allow that to happen. She would soothe her little bird when he worried. She would pet him, sing him the songs she remembers her mother singing to her. Sometimes he liked it and others he would tell her not to treat him like a baby. She would sometimes get mad at him if he lashed out at her but by the time they would go to sleep she had forgiven him. They sleep in the same bed. Talia prefers it that way since she never slept alone in the pit. 

As the weeks passed, Talia realized that she did not like others being around John. Her father was alright, even if he insisted on calling her John Robin. He said that parents give children their names for a reason but Talia knows John prefers to not be called that name. He did not look happy when father called him Robin but he did not complain and only Talia was allowed to add bird to the name he liked being called. John had told her about how he had been sent to different families but none of them wanted him. She could not understand how they could not want him and a part of her worried that someone would try to take him away. He makes her loneliness less. 

He knows more about this world outside the pit than she does. He teaches her things, tells her stories about some place called school. Neither of them go to one now. Father brings different people to teach them things. She teaches him things as well, things she learned in the pit. He looks at her as if she is the most important person in the world sometimes and she likes that he listens to her. 

Her John Bird has been with her over a year now and today is a special day. Her father has been gone for a little while, taking care of the promise he made her. There had been people watching them but they kept to themselves but this morning one of them came and told Talia that her father is back. John was still sleeping when father came to their room and told Talia that Bane was here now. He had told her where he would be and that she could see him but to wait a little while since he had been hurt. She knows that she has waited long enough. She wants Bane to see John and for John to see her protector. 

They are walking towards Bane’s room now. Talia is holding John’s hand, the one with his burn scars. She hates them. They are proof that she can not always keep him from getting hurt. He had gotten them shortly after coming with her. She had taken care of him best as she could after the oil burnt him but it had still scarred. It will be easier to take care of him now with Bane back. 

John has stopped walking suddenly. He looks nervous and she does not know why. “Talia, what if he doesn’t like me? Will I have to go away since he is here now and you won’t need me to help you anymore?” His words are very quiet and she almost does not hear them. She knows that John thinks that he takes care of her in a way too and she had told him all about Bane taking care of her in the pit. He thinks he is not needed now that she has her protector back but John is hers just as Bane is and she knows that they are both to be by her side. 

“ John Bird, you are mine, he will like you. I promise.” After her words, she kisses his forehead. He is growing very fast and he is almost as tall as she is, she doesn’t have to bend very far to put her lips on his head. It seems to soothe him and soon his excitement is back and they head to the door. 

*^*^*^*^*

Bane had not expected to live much longer after Talia had left. There was so much pain. He made himself focus on memories of her, of her rising. If he died, it would be worth it because she was away from this hell now. He was not sure how much time had passed until he had been rescued from the pit. Bane remembers the man that came to him in the pit, Talia’s father. He remembers leaving, remembers seeing the light fully for the first time. All of that has led up to this moment, seeing Talia again. 

He has been given a mask and it dulls the pain, he can think clearly for once. He worries what she will think of it. Will she see her once protector as a monster now? If she is scared, he would leave this place, he would not want her frightened of him. His Talia is brave though and she seems to pay no mind to the mask upon his face if the smile on hers is an indication as she enters the room. The sight of her makes him feel whole again. She is still very much a child, only a few years have seemed to pass since their parting. Her hair is longer, she has no need to hide her self anymore. She is so beautiful and his gaze is focused solely on her that it takes a moment for him to realize she did not come to the room alone. It is only when he looks at her hand that he sees she is holding the hand of a boy who appears a bit younger than her. 

The boy stares at him, not scared , more curious. When Talia gleefully says “Bane” and starts to move towards the bed , the boy seems to match her smile as if anything Talia is happy about , he is too. They climb next to him and he is not surprised when Talia hugs him but the boy mirroring her actions startles him a bit but he does not move. They are both a pleasant warm weight on his sides. 

“ We have been waiting for father to get you.” Talia’s voice is sweet and the boy nods in affirmation of what she said. Bane is not sure who the boy is. Talia’s bother , perhaps? “And who are we?” Bane’s voice comes out strange through the mask but neither child seems to notice it. “Me .” Talia replies and the boy looks up at Bane and says “ Me , too”. “ I have told bird about you, how you saved me, how you are my protector.” Talia explains as the boy then says protector like that is all he needs to know about Bane. Maybe it is. 

“This is John but father calls him Robin. He is mine.” Talia says this as if it is all Bane needs to know. It is. If the boy is Talia’s then he will be under Bane’s protection as well.  
“He came from a place almost as bad as the pit. I found him and father brought him with us and now he is mine. I take care of him.” Talia’s words are barely an explanation but when Bane looks at the boy’s eyes, sees the innocence there and the way Talia looks at him her words make more sense. His innocent had found her own little one to protect. He did not think his Talia could make him feel more for her than he already did but in this moment his love for her has grown. 

He spends most of the day with the children. It is nice to learn more about this place and Bane is glad to be near Talia again. John is shy but Bane can see why Talia has taken to him like she has. When it is time for rest, Talia’s father takes the children to their own room before showing Bane back to the chamber he was in earlier. 

Bane tries to find rest in the dark. It is not coming quickly. He reassures himself that they are all safe here, this is not the pit where Talia being away from him for a night could mean danger. He does not know how much time has passed when he hears his door open and sees two small figures make their way to his bed. 

“Should you be here?” He makes himself ask though he is glad to see them, he does not want them to get in trouble. “ It will be all right. Do you not want us here?” Talia asks this as she is directing John to climb into the bed on one side of Bane. The way she says it lets Bane know that she knows he will not send them away. “If you want to be here then you can stay.” He feels better with both of them here. Talia has climbed in next to John and Bane places his arm around her, John snuggled in between them. It is not long before they are both asleep and Bane lets himself drift away to the steady sound of their breathing. 

*^*^*^*^*  
John had never seen anyone as big as Bane. Talia had told him all about Bane, his size , everything he had done for her but it is different seeing him for real. The first thing he notices besides his size is the mask. 

It covers a lot of his face, John can only really see his eyes. Despite his size and the scars covering his body, his eyes do not scare John. They seem to light up the moment he sees Talia and John thinks they look nice that way. He is not scared because Talia isn’t and he trusts her. She would never bring him to someone that would hurt him. 

The next few days he gets used to sharing Talia more. He had always shared her with her father but that was a little different. Her father would spend time with them, teach them things, but sometimes when he looked at Talia he seemed sad. Bane never looked at Talia with sadness that John could see , only happiness right now. Bane is always nice to John because Talia is, so John is nice to him as well. He is glad he is out of the pit even if he has to share Talia with him. 

John had thought both Talia and her father had strange names but Bane was even stranger to him. That was the only thing he was called, from what Talia had told him, he had no middle or last name. Talia at least had a last name even if Ghoul was weird. It turned out that John’s name confused Bane as well. 

“ Why does Ra’s call you Robin and Talia calls you John and sometimes John Bird?” Bane asks him the question and John is confused by an adult not knowing something like the difference in names. He has to remember that Bane had never been outside of the pit, he may not know the same things as John. 

“My first name is Robin but I don’t like it and my middle name is John and I like that a little better but some of the kids back home…” as he starts to call Gothom home he sees Talia look at him , eyes narrowing in hurt, he changes what he is saying “ I mean, Gothom, used to call me Blake which is my last name. My mom always liked the name Christopher Robin but my dad did not want me named Christopher so she gave me Robin instead” He remembers just barely his mom reading Winne the Pooh to him and telling him that. It hurts sometimes, not remembering much of his mom. He asks a question to help himself not think about it. “Did your mother name you Bane?”

Bane takes a moment to think about his answer. John is getting better at reading Bane’s eyes but he is still not as good at it as Talia is. “ I am not certain. I have no memory of my mother and Bane is what they always called me in the pit. Robin is the name of a bird? Is that why you do not like to be called that?” John nods his head at that. “ I will call you John then. Why do you not get upset when Talia puts bird after your name?” John says “ Because it is her doing it.” just as Talia says “ Because he is mine” at the same time. Bane nods his head slightly like that makes sense. 

“ You can call me John Bird too if you want to.” It pops out of John’s mouth before he can stop it. He looks at Talia, expecting to see hurt on her face as he give another permission to use her nickname for him. Instead her face lights up in one of the most beautiful smiles John has ever seen. “ He is your little bird now too Bane.” Talia is excited by this and pulls John closer to Bane. Bane gets a funny look on his face that John can read very well but it looks like he is happy about something. That night when they go to bed, Bane wishes him a good night with a sweet dreams John Bird and it makes John feel warm and safe.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning Underage kissing I don't know if that really needs to be warned for. Also there has been interest shown by someone else to do this prompt as well witch I am super cool with. I will still do this story but soon there may be another story running around by an awesome writer that uses this prompt. I just thought I would let you guys know. Here is some more of this one for now

*^*^*^*^*  
Everything is packed and soon she will have to leave. Talia is not looking forward to this trip. She will be going by herself, a few of her father’s men with her, but not with her father and more importantly not with John or Bane by her side. She knows that she is not a child anymore, she is sixteen, a woman in many parts of the world and she can take care of herself but she prefers when the three of them are together. Her John is still young though he is not so small anymore and she does not like leaving him alone. Bane would be here to watch him but lately Father has kept him busy with other tasks and they do not see him as much as they would like. 

Last night she had almost snuck away to Bane’s room to get a chance to see him. They have not slept in Bane’s bed in a while, her father telling them that it is not proper because of her age. Bane takes her father’s words very seriously and had started to send them away when they would show up in his room late at night. She has had a separate room from John for a while as well but nothing has been said of the fact that she often would be in John’s bed at night or sometimes he would be in hers. They do not like to sleep apart. The fact that Bane would more than likely send her away if she went to his room last night stopped her from going there. She had spent the evening with Father and John instead and this morning she had been able to see Bane before he went to do his tasks for the day.

Their goodbye had been a slightly somber thing, Bane promising to look after John while she was gone. She had already been dressed in the clothes she was to travel in, a simple dress that she found silly, but it hugged her body in an appealing way. His eyes had noticed and Talia thinks she caught a glimpse of a something shimmering in his gaze before he turned from her. She had been noticing more that Bane is a man lately, not just her childhood protector. She has had glimpses of his body and the little bit she has seen has made something warm tingle in her. She knows when the time is right Bane will take care of her in whatever way she needs just as he always has. 

She has already said goodbye to Bane and now it is time to see John before she leaves. She makes her way to him, as she walks she plays with the little locket that hangs around her neck. All it contains is a small lock of hair, John’s from the last time it was trimmed. She had read stories of people keeping hair from their sweet hearts long ago and she remembers her mother keeping a bit of hers safe in the pit before her passing. John had found it a little strange but Talia had simply told him it was so she would always have a piece of him. She gave him a lock of hers as well. It is a silly, sentimental thing but her John Bird makes her soft in certain ways. 

 

She finds him in the hallway, on his way to see her off. His face shows his unhappiness a bit, if anyone else was here he would try to mask it, but he does not hide much from her. “ I do not understand why I have to stay here.” His words show his confusion. “ Father said there is no need for you on this trip, I would take you if I could.” It is the truth, she would rather John be with her. 

John looks at her, his face full of worry. Even frowning he is beautiful to her. “Just something doesn’t feel right, Talia.” He takes her hand holds it in his own. She knows what John means. There has been a feeling of unease in the air lately. Her father has insisted on this trip, telling her it would help her prepare for her responsibilities that she would have later. “ I will be back soon, Bane will be here to care for you.” He almost pouts when she says that. Talia thinks it is cute but he would not like her saying so. “ I do not need to be taken care of. I am not a puppy, you know.” 

“ I know. You are my sweet little bird.” He looks like he wants to argue with her but she pulls him forward giving him a kiss. It is something they have done before, when they were younger she would often kiss his hair or his cheek, now that they are older the kisses are different. Talia kisses much more now to claim than to soothe. Her John Bird is still young but he is starting to show what type of man he will grow to be and others have noticed as well. They are not often around others near their ages but the few times they have been, they have both been possessive. They belong to each other and no one else is allowed into their world except for Bane. 

John is hers, even if nothing more has been done than a few kisses. There will be time later for different types of touches between them but right now Talia ends her kiss with a little bite to John’s bottom lip, not enough to bleed but just enough that it is red. She enjoys the slight blush that is on John’s cheeks. “ I will miss you, John Bird.”

 

*^*^*^*^*  
Talia’s eyes are soft right now, soft in a way John knows she only lets a few people see. There is a slightly sad smile upon her face but she is still one of the prettiest things he has ever seen. This will be the first time they have ever really been apart since she found him so long ago. He touches her hair, fingers sifting through the soft strands. “ I will miss you too, Dew Drop.” Her eyes light up when he calls her that and her smile becomes a little less sad. 

He remembers asking what Talia meant once; he had always found it a strange name. Ra’s was not there for Talia’s naming and Talia herself was not sure why she was named that and so Bane had answered his question. “ It means Heaven’s dew. Water is precious where the pit is but Talia’s mother knew her daughter’s innocence was even more so.” Bane always talks about Talia as if she is the only thing that had ever mattered in his life in the pit and John sometimes thinks she is. John had teased Talia with Dew Drop but she liked it much more than John liked being called a bird. 

“ I will not be gone long and you know I will find you where ever you may be.” Talia tells him this just as her father enters the hallway. John can feel his gaze on them; he is watching them intently for some reason. Ra’s has always been good to John even if he insists on calling him Robin but lately John is worried about him for some reason. He does not seem to want Bane around them for some reason and John is unsure why. Bane has been a part of John’s world for a while, almost as much of it as Talia. 

Talia leaves soon after and John spends most of his evening with Ra’s studying. He does not see Bane at all and when he asks Ra’s about it, he is told that Bane is busy with other tasks and it should not worry him. John tries to rest but his room seems cold and lonely tonight. He is used to going to Talia’s or for her to come to his. He can not stand this feeling of loneliness and so he makes his way to another part of the compound, doing his best to avoid the eyes he knows Ra’s has watching at most time. Bane is not in his room yet but it still feels better to be here than in his own lonely room. It has been a while since he lay in Bane’s bed. Bane has been sending them away for a while now, something about it not being proper for them to be there. 

John snuggles into the bedding, he feels safer here. He hopes that perhaps Bane will talk with him for a bit before sending him away. It is with that thought that John drifts away to sleep while he waits for the owner of the room to show up. 

*^*^*^*^*  
Bane is tired from the day and he also carries the burden of worry. Talia is very far away from him and he does not like when he can not see to her safety himself. She had been able to talk to him this morning, telling him to take care of their little one. It was not a command that she needed to give. John is precious to him, perhaps not in the same way Talia is and not for as long but he is something beautiful in this world just like Talia is. John is still more child than man while Talia is almost completely a woman. 

Bane has tried not to see how Talia has grown, how she is changing, how sometimes she looks at him with the eyes of a woman seeing a man and not of a child seeing her guardian. He knows that she is starting to have urges, her father can see it as well and Bane knows this is part of the reason why he has been keeping him from her a bit. Bane can not help but notice her beauty but it is not for him to touch. He has never denied her anything but he will deny her this if it means he can stay near her, stay near them. John will be older soon and struggling with the same urges and Bane is sure that he and Talia will come together then. He has seen them share little kisses, stolen moments that very few get to see. He feels honored to see it , even though he is much too unworthy to think of either of them in that way. 

As soon as Bane enters his room, he knows someone else is still there. His body tenses but he notices the figure huddled in his blankets. It is John tucked into his bed. He had not been able to see him at all today and to see his face now eases a bit of the anxiety Bane had felt. He knows he needs to wake him, send him away before Ra’s knows he is not in his own bed, but he lets him sleep for just a few moments. 

He puts his hand gently on John’s chest feeling the steady rhythm of his heart. He has done this before with both of his innocents. Sometimes Bane just needs reassurance that such sweet beings were in fact real. 

John is sleeping so well that Bane can not stand to wake him. Instead, he picks him and makes his way to John’s room. He would let John stay with him if not for the fact that Ra’s will not approve. The journey is not that long and John is warm against Bane’s chest. He places him down on his own bedding ,placing covers on him. He thinks the boy will not awaken but as he goes to leave a hand grips his wrist. 

“Do you have to go? The room feels too cold without anyone else here.” John’s words are almost a whisper and are so honest Bane almost wants to stay. Bane knows he must tread around Ra’s , if the man thinks Bane has any ill intentions with his heirs than Bane will be cast aside. Bane will not allow himself to be separated from them. 

“ He will not approve. I will come here first thing in the morning to see you, you have my word.” It is not much but Bane hopes it will be enough to soothe John. It is. “ All right . Good night, Bane.” John is already starting to fall asleep and Bane leaves him with a goodnight John Bird that gets a small smile before the boy’s eyes close in sleep. 

Bane has trouble falling asleep but it is not long before the night has passed. Bane enters John’s chambers the next morning to find they are empty. There is a stab of worry that goes through his heart. He questions those around the room as to where John could be. He is informed that it is not of his concern and that he has been summoned to meet with Ra’s .

An hour later he is cast out of the League with no idea where John or Talia are.   
*^*^*^*^*


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is a bit more. There is some angst ahead.

*^*^*^*^*  
Talia had been called back earlier than excepted being gone barely two days and she is filled with worry. She had not been given a reason, just told her father needed her back. All she could think is that something befell John. She knew she should not have left him here and if something had happened to John more than likely something had happened to Bane as well. He would not let anything happen to their little bird if he has the power to prevent it. 

Talia knew as soon as she walked into the compound that something was wrong. There was tension in the air and many of the men would not look her in the eyes. There is no sign of John or Bane anywhere and it is her father who meets her. His eyes have a gleam of grim determination in them. He is moving stiffly and there are some bruises upon him that were not there when she left, but he is alive and whole so she does not inquire what caused his marks. “ Where are Bane and John, father? Are they all right?” It is the only thing that matters to her right now, knowing that they are safe.

 

Her father grabs her hands, holding them in a soothing way.“ This is not news that you will want to hear but you must. Talia, Bane has left. He does not hold the League’s ideals. There was a confrontation but Robin is safe but you can not see him right now. You both need time to think of what has happened. I know he was dear to you both but he was not as loyal as you thought.” Talia takes her hands out of his quickly. He is lying, she knows it. Bane would do nothing that would cause her pain, cause John pain. He would not leave them. 

“That is not true. Bane is our protector. There is none more loyal to us than him. Why will you not tell me what has happened to him? What has happened to John?” Her father must have a reason for not telling her the truth, maybe he is protecting her from something, but she knows that Bane would not leave them. 

“ He is gone, Talia, he is not part of your life anymore. You and Robin will be able to move on, perhaps even forget him in time.” He is touching her hair , trying to comfort her, but she feels there is a falsehood in his actions. She turns from his touch. She does not understand what her father is doing, why he is lying, why he does not have John here. 

“ I want to see John. He will tell me what has happened since you will not.” Her father shakes his head at her demand. “ You can not see him right now. Talia, believe me when I say that this is for the best. You need time to think before you see him, right now you both would upset the other. There is a new chamber prepared for you.” 

She wants to protest but she knows it will be better if she goes with her father for now. The chambers are very far away from John’s room. Her father tries to talk to her some more, tries to convince her that Bane left them behind. She knows it can not be the truth. It is only when she promises to lie down for a while that he leaves. There are guards out side her room and she thinks it is more to keep her here than for her protection. There are men here who are more loyal to Bane than to her father and one comes to visit her. The guards allow him to come in and Talia soon learns the truth. Her father exiled Bane, there was no fight , any hurt he has was placed there to provide false evidence for his story. 

Talia can feel anger burning through her. She will be able to go to Bane but first she must collect their little one. She would not allow her father to stop her even if the idea of hurting him made her feel uneasy. If he does not want Bane here than he also does not want her or John and it will be best that they leave this place and find their protector. They can make their way in this world just the three of them if they have to. 

 

*^*^*^*^*  
Ra’s knows she will come here, knows that this moment will be painful but it must be done. He waits for her , for Talia, to see her for what may be the last time, to let her know he will not lose everything. Looking back, the time before he fulfilled his promise to his daughter was the time he felt the most whole. 

He had not known of her or of her mother’s bargain. When he had been exiled he left not knowing why he had been spared but believing his beloved was safe. He should have known better, should have fought for her. When Talia showed up it had been years since he had seen his wife. The girl said she was his daughter and he saw enough of her mother in her to know it was the truth and that his beloved and the life they may have had was gone. Talia had told him all that she knew her name, her mother’s death, and her protector in the pit. He made a promise to her that if he was still alive that he would take him from the pit. It is a promise he should have never kept as it may cost him almost everything. 

Before the pit, there had been planning and a trip to Gothom. He wanted Talia to understand the League’s work as one day she would be carrying it out. He thought he had lost her again when she wondered away in the streets. Instead, she had found something. A boy, a bit younger than her, all alone. There was fire in those young eyes and the way Talia brought him along with her, Ra’s had known he could not leave the boy in Gothom. There would have been nothing but pain for him there anyway. He found out the boy’s identity, took care that it was covered up though a missing child would not matter much in Gothom. 

This was a chance. The boy could be shaped and in the future perhaps if they were fond enough of each other, he and Talia could marry. Ra’s did not like the idea of future suitors for his daughter but this could be one that he would be able to make sure is worthy of his daughter. 

Robin took to Talia and her to him. Talia would let no other claim him, not even Ra’s though he had more privileges towards the boy than Talia would allow others. She would allow him to be near and was the only one who could call the boy by his name that his parents had given him, Robin. She preferred calling him John as that was the name he liked better. He enjoyed watching them together. Seeing Talia sometimes made his heart ache for the wife he had lost but seeing her happy made it ache a little less. 

He fulfilled his promise to Talia. What he took out of the pit seemed broken to him, a mask had to be made for the man to even function without pain, but Talia still saw him as her protector and Robin saw him as the same. Suddenly, Talia started to refer to Robin as ours, hers and Bane’s. He worried about the attachment they both had to Bane. Bane’s loyalty is to the children and not Ra’s and he worries about the influence he has over them, the fact that Bane could perhaps turn those who are Ra’s family against him if he felt the need. 

Bane developed strength and skill and there was no denying that he had cunning and was a survivor. Ra’s could see though that he could be dangerous . He had been in the pit too long, was broken, barely human. He allowed him to stay because of the children’s love for him but he saw the threat in him. 

The time has come when Talia is more woman than child and so much like her mother that it makes him ache. He knew that she was starting to have urges and her eyes watched Bane and the desire that was there is what made Ra’s realized that he could not allow Bane to stay with the league any more. He knew that Talia would not understand , perhaps leave as well so he took measures. 

He made sure she was gone; there were certain times he would send her away for lessons. He also made sure to secure Robin. He threw Bane out of the League, making sure he was gone before calling Talia back. He had tried to convince her that Bane had abandoned her, left them, but he knows she did not believe him and that there are those in the League loyal to Bane that would tell her what happened. Once she finds out the truth she would try to leave but she would not leave alone. Now he sits in what was once Robin’s room and waits for her. 

He only hears her because he has been listening for her. She moves well, has taken what she has been taught and uses it. She is furious when she sees him and no sign of what she had came to get. 

“ I know why Bane is gone. We will be going to him now. Where is John, father?” The last word is uttered with such disdain, it sounds like a curse. 

“ Robin is safe and if you stay with me, I will take you to him.” He wants her to agree , wants her to stay with him, if he can just have more time with her he is sure he can make her understand. 

“ You have cast us aside. You have no place in the League for us.” He knows Talia is including herself and Robin in Bane’s exile. So much like her mother , that passion, the need to share in the punishment of those she loves. 

“ Only Bane. You and Robin still have a place with me. I know you do not understand but he should have never left the pit. I am granting him a mercy by not returning him to it or having him killed.”

“ A rejection of Bane is a rejection of us. Now, where is he? I intend to take him, his place is with us.” Her eyes shine with anger and he could find it beautiful if it was not aimed at him. Her hair is in her face and he goes to touch a strand and she moves from his touch. He thought losing his wife had left him without his heart but he knows that it is still there as now it is breaking. 

“Talia, I do not want you to leave and I will not allow you to take Robin with you. He is part of my family now just as you are and I will not lose you both to Bane. I will keep him from you until you give up your loyalty to Bane.” 

“John is not yours and I will not give up our protector.” She spits the words out. “ He will not thank you for keeping him from us.” He knows her words are true for now, but that can be changed. He will not lose both of them. 

Talia loves Bane, Ra’s knows this even if he does not approve, but she also loves Robin and it is that love that Ra’s will exploit now. “ Talia, if you want to find Bane then go, but know that you will be giving up Robin. Can you do that? Is loyalty to Bane worth giving up your John Bird?” 

He can see her eyes narrow when he says this. She is so angry and he can tell she wishes to lash out at him. “I will not be giving up either. Where is John? I will do what I must to find him.” He knows that she may perhaps hurt him to get what she wants but he has thought of that and planned accordingly.

“ He is safe but that safety comes with the condition that only my return to where he is will allow him to leave. I will do what I must to keep at least one of you away from that monster.” As soon as the last word leaves his mouth Talia slaps him. It stings but Ra’s heart hurts more at the look on Talia’s face. There is nothing there but anger. She is still so young and so rash. She is his daughter, his flesh and blood, but in this moment he knows that very little of her loyalty is for him, she gave most of it to Bane so very long ago and the bit that she had left, most was given to the little boy in the alley she found. 

“You will not be able to hide him from me forever, Father. I will find him.” She is almost shaking with anger as she starts towards the door, knowing she will not be able to get John tonight. He knows he could try to keep her here but he is not sure he can break her bond with Bane right now. She would cling to it stubbornly. 

“ Talia, if you leave I will do all in my power to keep Robin from you as long as you are with Bane. If you leave, he will be the only part of you I will have left and I will not lose him. Think about it Talia.” One last chance given, one final warning for his daughter. 

She turns towards him, eyes still so angry but determined. “ I will find him, you can not keep him from us forever. Good-bye, Father.” With those last words, she leaves and Ra’s is left alone . 

*^*^*^*^*  
John is not sure where he is or how he got here. He remembers going to sleep after Bane left and then nothing till he woke up in this room. There are people here but they will not tell him what is going on, they are only in the room long enough to leave food. He waits. He does not think he will be harmed here and he knows that if he is in any danger than Talia or Bane will come. They promised always to keep him safe and he knows that they will keep that promise.

There is a noise and John sees a figure enter through the now open door. It is Ra’s and the man looks sad and determined all at the same time. It is not who he was hopping to enter the door but John is glad to see someone familiar who will tell him. Ra’s comes over to him but he does not speak, instead he puts his arms around John pulls him close. The touch is not unfamiliar, Ra’s has always treated him in a way close to how he treats Talia but it has been awhile since he has embraced him like this. It worries John, this sudden embrace, Ra’s sadness. All John can think of in this moment is that something has happened to Talia. 

“ Is Talia all right?” He tries to keep his voice steady, he can be strong. If Talia is hurt, he can be strong for her. He wants Bane. Bane would tell him right away instead of staring at him like Ra’s is right now. 

“ You may not see her again. She has left us Robin.” His words do not sound right to John. He knows that she would not leave him. She is not like so many others, the families that said they would take care of him then never did. “No. She would not. Where is Bane? I want to see him.” He needs to see Bane. Bane will tell him the truth. 

“ He is gone. They have chosen each other, they will not come for you. I am all you have now, Robin.” Ra’s is lying, John knows it. There is a little fear that what he says is the truth but John will not dwell on that. Instead, he focuses on the anger he feels, the anger that never really went away just dulled into something manageable when Talia and Bane are near him. His words come out furious . “No. Where are they? Why are you not letting me see them?” 

He has ripped himself from Ra’s arms, the man is trying to calm him down, trying to explain Talia’s and Bane’s betrayal, but all John knows is that he is lying, they would not leave him if they decided to go, he would go with them. He is pelting him with his fists, Ra’s only blocking a few and after a good hit that has Ra’s staggering a bit, John makes for the door. He will find them if Ra’s refuses to tell him what is going on. 

There are others blocking the door. There are too many to make it past and a needle is stuck into his arm, something injected into him. It makes him woozy and his body feels kind of numb and his head starts to feel like it is stuffed with cotton. He does not fall to the floor as Ra’s is there to catch him. He wants to lash out at the man but everything is starting to feel strange. John is put on the bed and Ra’s sits next to him stroking his hair in a way that he has only allowed Talia or Bane to do. Ra’s stares at him with those sad , determined eyes and John is scared in a way though most of him feels fuzzy right now. 

“This is for the best Robin. You are all I have now, you will forget them in time. I know it will hurt for a bit but you do not need them, I will be all that you need.” Ra’s is trying to make his words comforting but John just wants to shout at him that he won’t forget them, that they are his but the words will not come out of his mouth and he is soon lost to the blackness that claims his vision.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, here is a bit more. Also I just wanted to let everyone know that Icalynn is also doing a version of this prompt, it is called Forgotten and so far it is super cute and awesome and you should check it out. Allright, now onto the story and let me know what you think.

*^*^*^*^*  
They have not been able to get John back yet. It is something that Bane knows troubles Talia and it causes his guilt and own pain to grow. 

When he had been forced out of the League, he had never expected to see either child again. It left him with a sense of loss, one greater than when Talia left the pit. Then he knew it was better for her to be separated from him, the pit was no place for one so innocent. He had tried to tell himself in the first few days of his exile that perhaps it would be better for them to be separated from him now. They would still be together, Talia and John, and Bane told himself that would be enough for them. Ra’s had called him a danger to them and it is a fear that Bane himself felt, that he would one day causes them harm. He had a few allies still in the League, very few but enough that he would be able to find information out about his little ones. He could still be reassured of their safety even if he could not attend to it himself. 

Talia had shown up where he had been staying shortly after his exile. He had not had any news of her yet, not even knowing where John was or if she had returned to the mountains. Bane had been glad to see her, a bit of his worry easing, but she was alone. Her face held so much anger and sadness, it hurt him to see it, but her eyes held a bit of relief when she saw him. She made her way to him then. The way she moved made her seem more a woman in this moment, one who held grief but determination. Whatever had transpired before Talia had made her way here has taken away many of the traces of her childhood she still had. Her fingers touch his mask and then his face as if reassuring her self he is there before her. 

“Talia, does your father know you have come here?” He is sure that she is not to be here, Ra’s had made it very clear that Bane was not to see either Talia or John again. She stills at his question, body tensing in anger, she is trying not to show too much emotion but he knows her so well that he can see it clearly. 

“ He does. I was sent for shortly into my absence. I was not told why. John was my first thought, something had happened to him.” He sees a very brief flash of pain over her face. “My father greeted me, John was not with him, there were bruises upon him, marks he tried to pass off as coming from you. He told me you left, were not loyal to us.” He feels anger that someone would ever try to make her doubt his loyalty to them. He does not say anything, lets her continue as his rage smolders just beneath the surface of is mind. “I knew it was a lie even before I was told by another the truth. I knew we could not stay there. I went to fetch John and confront my father. He tried to force me to make a choice.” 

Bane has an idea of what that choice was. “Where is John, Talia?” She almost shakes as words tumble out of her mouth.

“I do not know. He would not tell me, tried to make me choose to go to you or go with him to John. I will not give up either of you. He is not my father’s, he is ours and we will find him.” He is touched by her loyalty as he holds her, whispers promises into hr hair that they would find John and bring him back to where he belongs, beside them. 

It is a promise he has not been able to fulfill in the last few months.

The first few weeks had been the worst. They had no information. It is not an easy task to get information from the League after Bane’s exile and Talia leaving. Those who are loyal to Bane that Ra’s knew about were exiled when Bane was. There are a few still in the League that are unknown to Ra’s but they were unable to pass information for a while. More time had passed than they would have liked before one was able to make contact. 

Ra’s is keeping John in seclusion it would seem, hidden from most. He works on shaping John from what they have been told, trying to sever his bond with them. Bane does not like this. Their John is all alone, their ally can not do much without giving himself away. Right now Ra’s trusts their man and they need it to stay that way till they can get John back. They have not had new information for a while from him and it worries them both. 

Talia has changed in this short time. Hardly anything of a child remains and it saddens Bane. He wanted her to keep her childhood for as long as she could. She has always faced more tragedy than one so innocent should. He fears how she may change if they can not get John back. He also worries about Ra’s finding her, trying to take her away as well. It is a thought that had kept him up last night as Talia lay with him. Now morning has come and with it Talia had gone so see if any news was to be given today. 

When she comes back, her face is a bit grim but there is also hope in her eyes and Bane knows that they have news today. 

“ He is using a decoy now. He has sent him up to the mountains to get things ready, he is calling himself Henry now.” Talia does not refer to Ra’s as father anymore, just saying he or calling him by his first name, both usually dripping with venom. Bane can understand what she is feeling. “ He is still not allowing many to be around John without his supervision, but he has found someone he wants to train himself and he is bringing John back to the mountains soon. He could be distracted; we may have a chance soon.” 

Bane knows they will leave here soon, make their way to somewhere closer to the home of the League. Any chance to get their little bird they must take. He just worries what state he will be in when they find him. It is something they will deal with when necessary but for now there are plans to make.   
*^*^*^*^*  
No one will call him John anymore and Bane and Talia are never to be talked about. He tried to ask about them a lot in the beginning but all he would be told is that they are betrayers. He knows that can not be true but everything is a bit confusing. He clings to the idea of them but now he knows it is better not to talk about them. 

Since they left, John has spent almost all of his time with Ra’s. John never calls him that out loud anymore, only thinks it in his head now. The few times they have been around others that John does not know he is to call him Henry. There have also been times when they have been alone that the man has wanted him to call him father. John will refuse sometimes because it doesn’t feel right and he is so angry at him but then there are other times where his head feels different and it doesn’t feel odd to listen to him and call him what he wants. Some times, John even thinks of him as father and once his head feels less strange it worries him. Ra’s is not his father, his father died before Talia found him. He repeats it to himself sometimes in his head at night, it seems important to remember. 

He is given water that tastes strange and if he refuses it he is given injections. He tries to fight but it usually doesn’t work. That is when his head feels strange and the things he is told make more sense than they do when his head is not fuzzy. It was during one of these times his locket was taken away. It is the only thing of Talia’s he had left. He remembers Ra’s trying to take it from him, telling him it would remind him of those he need not think about. John tried to hold on to it, but the man with Ra’s at the time, Barsad, had taken it from his fingers and had whispered in his ear that he would keep it safe. John is not sure if he would but there was not much choice. 

He misses his locket, misses having something that reminds him of Talia and Bane. He dreams of them at night even if it is getting harder to think of them during the day. Sometimes, he thinks maybe Ra’s is right and they will not come for him but that thought makes him hurt. Soon, he is taken back to the mountains. 

John is watched constantly but Ra’s tell him shortly after they arrive that he will be seeing to someone’s training personally and that he may not spend as much time with him. It is a relief to John. The day that the newcomer arrives he is not watched as closely and sneaks out of his room. The chambers he stays in now are far away from where he used to sleep here and he wants to see Talia’s room again, see if she left anything. He wants something of hers, so that he can hold it and think of Talia and Bane. 

When John enters it, the newcomer is already there, and John knows he went through the ritual of the flower toady and he can not help but be curious. Even though he knows he should go back to his own chamber before it is discovered he is gone, he asks a question instead. 

“What did it make you see?”

*^*^*^*^*  
Bruce is exhausted, bone tired from the journey, and still shaken from his experience with the fear toxin. He knows that tomorrow will be just as hard, if not harder, but he needs this, needs a purpose, something to help direct his anger. 

Henry had bought him to a room so he could get a few moments rest. He almost thought he caught a flash of pain in the man’s eyes when he showed him the room but he is not certain. 

It is simple but there is bedding and that is all Bruce needs at the moment. Before he can rest completely , he hears the door open and he is on guard instantly , expecting perhaps another test. Instead what he sees is a boy who enters the room, one who can’t be more than thirteen or fourteen. 

“What did it make you see?” The boy asks him, tone almost curious. He is staring at Bruce as if he can see more than he should. It is strange to see one so young here. Bruce decides it can do no harm to give the boy at least part of an answer. 

“Bats. Why are you here?” Bruce wonders if he will get an answer, the boy seems to be thinking deeply about what to say. He after a moment gives an answer but there is a pause in it as if he is not sure how much he can tell Bruce. 

“ I wanted to see what was still here, wanted something of hers, something that might have been theirs, even if I am not supposed to think of them.” The answer is very strange. He wonders who the boy is, what he could be doing here. It does not seem a place for children. 

“ What is your name?” It is a simple question but it makes the boy’s eyes darken with worry a bit. Instead of giving him a name, he asks for Bruce’s instead. 

“ Bruce Wayne.” When he says his last name there is a spark of recognition in the boy’s face. “From Gothom?” He asks moving closer to Bruce a little bit. 

“ Heard of me?” Now Bruce is even more curious. 

“ I know Gothom. Or I did . I was born there, have not been there in a long time.” His words tumble out, as if he is glad to have someone to talk to . “ Are you here to learn to help cleanse it?” The boy sits down near him now, waiting for answer. 

“ I suppose I am. I still don’t know your name.” The boy still does not give him a name yet, instead he asks another question. 

“Are bats really what you are must afraid of ? You are much bigger than they are.” He speaks as if Bruce is being particularly strange with his fear. “ They frightened me when I was young. Once I fell into a cave when I was younger than you. There were bats everywhere. There were so many of them and they swarmed. I thought they might bite a finger or maybe something else off.” The boy smiles slightly when Bruce says this and it makes him look a little less sad and angry which is how Bruce would have described him when he first appeared

“ You could have always bitten them back, Mr. Wayne.” Bruce smiles a bit at that. “ I will keep that in mind for next time. You can call me Bruce. What do you want to be called?” He really wants to know the kid’s name if he is going to sit here and chat with him. 

“ I want to be called John, but no one will call me that now. My first name is Robin.” The boy is scowling as he says this and Bruce wants to lighten the mood. 

“ You look a little big to be a bird.” Something about those words makes John’s eyes sad. “ Some one else told me that once, before I left Gothom. I am not named after the bird, but they used to call me John Bird before they left. I shouldn’t be talking about this.” John looks like he is about to leave but Bruce finds that he is still curious about this boy. 

“ Did you come here with your parents, John?” He doesn’t see any sense in not calling the boy the name he wants. It seems to relax him a bit , hearing that name. 

“ No. My parents died. My mother in a car accident, I was there but I don’t really remember it. I remember my father’s death, I was young but I was there for that one, too. He was shot.” John says the last part with slight hesitation. Almost everyone in Gothom knows who Bruce Wayne is and how his parents die. Bruce can also see a bit of anger in his eyes, an anger he has felt himself. 

He places his hand on John’s shoulder, not sure if he wants the contact. Bruce isn’t very good with kids, even though John is not all that much of a kid, but John seems all right with the touch. John is looking at him and when he speaks, it is something Bruce is not quite excepting. “How did you get out of the cave? Did you climb?” 

It takes him a moment to realize what John is asking about. “ My father got me out. My arm was broken, not too badly, but it still hurt.” With his answer he hears footsteps approaching. John tenses up besides him a bit and waits the door. 

It is Henry who enters and when he sees John in the room , he looks a little relieved but also concerned. His eyes seem to linger on Bruce’s hand on John’s shoulder and it makes Bruce quickly take his hand away. “ Robin, you left your room.” It is a statement, not a question, but John gives an answer none the less. 

“ I was lonely.” It is such a simple statement and Bruce once again wonders what John is doing here, there does not seem to be any other children here and he is struck by the fact that it is possible that John has no one here that he feels connected to. 

Henry’s eyes seem to soften a little bit as he moves towards John, there is affection and something else in the way he places his hands on John’s shoulders and looks at him.   
“Perhaps you can visit Mr. Wayne later. For now, he needs rest and there are lessons you need to attend to.” Henry starts to lead John to the door. “ I will see you in the morning, Bruce, there is much to do.” 

“ Good-bye. It was nice talking to you.” Bruce says this to John and it is the truth, even if the whole thing was a bit strange. Bruce has a lot of questions he will need answered about John but he knows that now is not the time. 

“Good-bye, Bruce.” John leaves with Henry and as he does so, Bruce is once again struck by how odd the boy being here seems. It is something he will think about till he gets his answers but for now he rests. Henry is right ,there is much to do. 

 

*^*^*^*^*


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So my brain wants to skip ahead a bit and I'm trying to stop it from doing that. I hope this part doesn't drag but I got a bit stuck but I think I have worked it out. Please let me know what you think.

*^*^*^*^*  
After he had taken Bruce to Talia’s old room to rest , he had gone to see Robin. It is a risk to train someone else as Robin is still clinging to his bond with Talia and Bane, but Ra’s can not allow the opportunity that Wayne represents to slip through his fingers. He has potential and Ra’s will shape it and then Gothom will have its reckoning by the hand of its favored son. 

The shaping of Robin is taking longer than Ra’s would prefer. He used to admire the loyalty Robin holds for Talia , found their devotion to each other sweet. He had encouraged it to grow even as he had tried to weaken the devotion the children hold for Bane. Now, Talia has left him and he needs Robin to stay and if that means breaking his bond to Talia then it must be done. Perhaps once Robin’s loyalty is secured, he may be able to get his daughter back but for now he needs to see Robin. He will start Wayne’s training tomorrow and time to be spent with Robin will be less and every moment counts. Robin has been softening towards him and he needs it to continue. 

He enters the chambers where Robin is being kept, connected to his own. The boy is not there. Panic enters him then and he knows he must find him. He talks quickly to a few others but he has an idea of where Robin may go and starts his way to there. Not everyone can be trusted here and he knows he has not weeded out all those who may still help Bane and Talia. He can not risk a possible traitor finding Robin first. 

He is now regretting allowing Wayne Talia’s room for his rest. He opens the door and Wayne is talking to Robin who tenses up when the door opens but seems comfortable in Wayne’s presence. Ra’s takes notice of the hand upon Robin’s shoulder. It is hard to watch him not move away from Wayne’s touch, to watch him give this man he barely knows this privilege while it has taken time for Robin to stop jerking away from his touch in anger. Wayne removes his hand quickly at Ra’s glance and it settles the slight anger the sight gave him. 

He quickly gathers up Robin, ushers him out of the room before Bruce can ask any questions. This is not something he had planned for. He had no intentions of Bruce knowing about Robin or even his own identity. Bruce has potential but is still shackled by many of the rules of Gothom. Ra’s will have to think of what their meeting will mean for both of them.

 

He does not speak to Robin on their way back to their chambers, instead thinking of what Robin had said about being lonely. There are no others around his age here. It had not been a problem with Talia here, they seemed to need no others their age when they had been together. Robin has no connections tying him here, he has still not accepted Ra’s as he should. Perhaps if he befriends Bruce, there will be an additional bond to keep him here. 

The idea has its advantages. If he can monitor their interactions, tailor them, it can be a way to ensure that they both take the place Ra’s has decided for them. Tomorrow, he will start shaping their future interactions but tonight he will work on Robin.

It is difficult molding him. Ra’s does not want his fire to dim but he needs him loyal to him, not to Talia and Bane. The drugs help. They make him susceptible to suggestions, blur his memories a bit. It seems to have hit a bit of a standstill recently and Ra’s has started to wonder if perhaps the doses have been weakened. He will need to speak to Barsad about it as the man has been the one in charge of the chemicals mostly. 

That night, he does what he can. Robin is weakening in his resolve to remember his bond with Talia and Bane and Ra’s starts to place the idea of a friendship with Bruce into his mind. It is not difficult. Robin seems to like Bruce, perhaps it is their common ground of where they come from. The next day, he is not surprised when Bruce asks questions. 

“Who is he? He said he was from Gothom He also said something about someone leaving? .” Ra’s does not need Bruce to clarify who he is asking about. 

“His name is Robin John Blake, he was found in Gothom many years ago. There was nothing left for him there. He is to be Ra’s heir when he comes of age.” Everything he tells Bruce is the truth, even if Bruce does not know all of it. “ A few months ago there was a man who betrayed us. He attempted to take Robin form here. He is dangerous but Robin is fond of him and Ra’s believed he may try to use that fondness to his advantage. He was stopped but Robin is still in danger till he is gone. ” He paints a picture for Bruce of Bane’s betrayal, of Robin’s life here. 

He allows Robin to spend time with Bruce that day and the next. He is there with them watching, making sure that nothing happens to make either suspicious. Robin is growing fond of Wayne and it seems mutual. Wayne also seems dedicated to the cause and things seem to be working out better than he had planned but Robin still clings to the idea of Bane and Talia even if he never refers to them by name any more. He had heard him whisper something to Wayne once about dew drop and their protector and that night he increases the dosage of the drugs. He had heard rumors that they are near the mountains now and he is certain that they may try to take him soon. Ra’s will make sure that Robin will stay right here. 

*^*^*^*^*  
Bruce is determined to make a difference and it seems that the League could be his chance. He is learning quickly, every mistake seen to and corrected. He has very little interaction with Ra’s himself but he sees the man watch him from time to time. Most of his training is done with Henry and spare moments are spent with John. 

Bruce calls him Robin around others since it seems to be expected but the few moments they have been alone he has called him John since it seems he prefers that. The boy being here still seems very strange to Bruce. He is watched constantly and for being found by Ra’s and made his heir, Bruce has yet to see them interact. Most of the time he has seen John, the boy is with Henry. 

Henry treats John kindly from what Bruce has seen. There is a fondness there and he thinks back to what Henry had said about having a family once. Bruce wonders if perhaps he had lost a child as well as his wife and that is why he watches John so closely. 

John is curious about Bruce and asks questions constantly. Bruce finds it easy to talk to John for the most part, even easier than it had been to talk to Rachael. 

“ Where were you before you came here? Were you found in Gothom, too?” 

John asks him this one day when they are by themselves for a change. 

“ I was in a prison.” 

John doesn’t find his answer all that strange. 

“ Was it like the pit? Did you have to climb out?”

“It wasn’t a pit. I was let go. Do you know someone who has climbed out of a prison?” Bruce means the question as a bit of joke but John takes it seriously.

“ Yes. They were here before but now they are gone.” John will sometimes mention a mysterious they, the only names Bruce has been able to get from him have been a mumbled Dew Drop and protector. Bruce wonders if this is the exile that Henry told him about , the one who is dangerous. 

“That must have been difficult.” Bruce wants to continue the conversation as he feels that there is something he needs to know. 

“ I was told you can only trust yourself when you climb, can’t trust the rope.” John says this as if it is an old childhood story. “I shouldn’t talk to you about this, if I say too much I might not be able to see you.” 

“ John, why can’t you talk about this?” Bruce is starting to feel uncomfortable about all of John’s talk about what he is supposed to or not supposed to do. 

“Their names are not to be mentioned. They are betrayers but I do not believe that. I’m supposed to forget about them and sometimes I think I am and it scares me. I don’t want to forget them.” He looks very lost in this moment and Bruce is reminded that he is still fairly young. Bruce has also noticed that he is rubbing the inside of his arm and he looks at it. There are little puncture marks on it. “I wish I had my locket. It makes it easier to remember when I have it.” John has talked about the locket before and Bruce wonders why John thinks about it so much. Their conversation is ended abruptly as Henry enters the room. 

“Robin, it is time to go back to your room. Bruce, I will see you shortly.” Henry always takes John back to his room anytime he may be gone for a while, it is almost like John is trapped here and the thought worries Bruce.

“ Why don’t I walk with you? Robin, do you want to show me your room?” Bruce tries to make it sound casual, that he is just interested in anything John might want to show him, but in truth he wants to know where John stays here, wants to see what conditions he lives in. 

Henry looks like he is going to deny the request but John is replying yes before he can and he seems to give in a bit. 

John’s room is in a part of the compound that Bruce never really goes to. John’s room seems just like many of the other rooms, not much in it but a bed and a small table and chairs and a bookcase with a few books. It is connected to one of the other rooms and Bruce wonders whose it is. 

Shortly after they enter the room, one of the other men shows up.Bruce recognizes him as one of the few he has had conversations with . His name is Brasad and he looks a little surprised to see Bruce in the room. He has what looks a little like a medical case with him and Bruce is not sure why that is needed right now. He thinks for a moment to the marks on John’s arms. John looks at the case and there is a bit of fear in his eyes. 

“Now, Robin you know it won’t hurt. This is needed. It will only take a moment then you need to rest. Bruce, Robin has some medicine he needs to take, it may be better if you leave. Barsad can show you back to your chamber and then we will have some more training in the evening.” 

Bruce looks at Henry than at John. He is sure that Henry cares for the boy, would not let any harm come to him but John seems a bit ill at ease right now. 

“ Do you want me to stay till it is over? I used to hate any medicine I had to take when I was your age.” Bruce asks John this, hoping it will get him a chance to see what is going on.   
“ If he stays, will you take it with out any problems?” Henry asks and is looking at John, watching for his reaction. 

John nods his head and Bruce watches as he is given an injection. The liquid is not one Bruce has seen before it makes John’s eyes glaze a bit. Bruce helps him to his bed and as he does, he can see Henry talk to Barsad in a hushed tone that he can not make out words with. 

“My head feels fuzzy.” John says it softly so that only Bruce can hear. 

“ I’m sure you will feel better soon. Why do you have to take it?’ Bruce asks because he needs to know. 

“ To help me think the way I’m supposed to.” Something about that answer troubles Bruce. 

Before he can ask more, Henry is ushering him out of the room with Barsad, saying that Robin needs rest. Bruce says good bye to John and touches his shoulder as he leave and he notices Barsad watching. 

Bruce has spent a little time with the man he walks with now and he wonders if Barsad will be willing to answer some of his questions. Before he gets a chance to ask anything, Barsad speaks. 

“ He seems to like you. Are you fond of the boy as well, Mr. Wayne?” The question seems simple but Bruce has a feeling this is a test of sorts but he is not sure whose. 

“ Why does it matter to you?” 

“ Just wondering. Not many are allowed around him, you should feel privileged that you are.” 

“ What did you give him back there? He said it made his head feel fuzzy .” Bruce is not sure he is going to get an answer but he does. 

“ Something that I had to. Trust me, Mr. Wayne, when I say that I have no intention of harming him. Do you think he should be here?” 

It is a strange question but Bruce decides to answer it honestly, maybe he will get some more answers. 

“I am not sure. Is there something I should know? I do not want John hurt.” 

Bruce lets the name slip out and Barsad looks at him in a curious way. 

“ Did he say that is what he wants to be called?” Bruce doesn’t answer so Barsad continues. 

“I can not tell you much but know that there is more going on here than you know about and some of it deals with John. Think about how much you care about him.” 

Barsad is looking at him as if he is trying to decide something.

“ This is his. Next time you are alone with him, give it to him. Do not let any one else see it.” Barsad gives him something quickly and Bruce puts it in his pocket. It feels like a locket and he thinks about what John has said before. With that Barsad leaves and Bruce just has more questions he needs answers to.

*^*^*^*^*  
John is starting to forget things. He tries to repeat them in his head but it is not helping as much as he would like. Saying them out loud helps but he can not do that around most people. Bruce lets him talk about the things he is not supposed to and sometimes even asks questions and it helps John a bit to have someone to talk to. 

Bruce will call him John sometimes and that helps him to remember a lot. He is being called Robin so much that sometimes that is the name he thinks in his head but then he will be alone with Bruce and he will call him John and things feel less fuzzy. 

He is being given the injections so much now that he doesn’t really fight them anymore. It won’t stop them from happening and if he doesn’t fight they don’t hurt as much. He tells Bruce about it making his head feel fuzzy and Bruce said he would feel better soon. He hopes Bruce is right. 

He feels like he is losing himself piece by piece every day as he starts to forget them. He starts to not mind. Maybe it is better this way, that is what Father, no not Father, Ra’s tells him. John’s head is confused about what to call the man and a part of him tells him not to listen to what he says but that part is starting to get quieter.

He is with Bruce right now and they are alone. Bruce and Henry are the only people who he can be with by himself. His head is feeling even fuzzier today. Bruce looks at him strangely before taking something from out of his bedding. 

“ I was told this is yours. Is it?” Bruce holds out a necklace and when John sees it , things in his head start to clear. His locket. John grabs it quickly, needing to feel its weight, make sure it is real. 

He opens it once it is in his hands. The hair is still there. John hurts a bit, a lonely ache.   
It is hard to think about them but John wants to. He wants to see them but he doesn’t know where they are. He holds the locket tight. He doesn’t want to forget them. 

“ It is mine. I had almost forgotten. He wants me to forget. I do not want to.” He almost feels like crying but he does not want Bruce to think him weak.

“ John, you need to tell me what is going on. Does the forgetting have to do with the medicine that I saw you take?” Bruce looks worried but his hands are on John’s shoulders and that makes John feel a little better. 

“Yes.” He whispers, not sure how much he should tell Bruce , but he trusts him. 

There are sounds coming now. Someone will be here soon. John hides his locket in his pocket. It is Henry at the door and soon he is taken back to his room. Before they leave, he looks at Bruce who still looks worried about something. 

That night, he only takes the locket out once he is alone. It makes him feel a bit more like himself to have it back.   
*^*^*^*^*


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So this part was a bit of a struggle for me. I had to talk it out with my cat witch does not work that well but I got it figured out . There is some angst here but please let me know what you think.

*^*^*^*^*  
It was very risky to give Wayne the locket. The man is still an unknown in many ways, is being groomed by Ra’s himself, but he is the only one who has access to John without Ra’s presence around. Barsad must hope that what he has judged about the man is correct. 

The task he has been given by his brother and sister has been difficult. He must always be aware of what he is projecting, least Ra’s finds out where his loyalty lies. Giving the locket to Wayne to give back to John was an act of desperation in a way. John is starting to loose himself, Barsad can see it. He is doing all that he can to prevent it but Ra’s is determined and it is hard to stand in the man’s way. 

He had been surprised when Ra’s had started allowing John to be with Wayne alone. He watched how John interacted with Wayne and thought perhaps the man could be an ally. The night that Wayne saw John get his injections seemed to be the time to take a chance. Wayne seemed worried about the boy, had called him John, and Barsad saw it as an opportunity. John would do better if he could have a reminder of those who are waiting to get him back. 

The next few days are spent with Barsad worrying about if the gamble will pay off. Ra’s has started increasing the dosages and Barsad is not always the one to mix them now. It is possible that the man is starting to suspect something. Barsad has not been cast out yet so he trusts that Wayne has not said anything about the locket. He is confronted by Wayne a week after he had given him the locket. 

The man speaks calmly but there is anger in his eyes and Barsad can see why Ra’s would want to handle his training himself.

“ I want to know what is being done to John and why that locket was taken away.” 

Barsad knows he must tread carefully.

“ The locket was taken from him because it reminds him of someone Ra’s would rather he forget. The drugs are to help sever his ties. Did you tell anyone about the locket?” 

“ No. I gave it to John, he looked relived to see it. Who gave it to him?” 

Wayne is curious but cautious . He cares about John and Barsad hopes it will be enough. 

“One who cares for him greatly. The boy is not safe here. There is not much I can tell you, Mr. Wayne, but know that there are those who would care for him if he can escape here.”

“Henry cares for him. I do not believe he would have John here if he thought it would cause him harm.” 

Wayne trusts the mask Ra’s wears. It is a problem. Barsad knows he can not tell the whole truth at this time but he must say enough to start planning doubts in Wayne that John should be here. 

“He does care for the boy but he is loyal to Ra’s and his goals more than you know. Ra’s believes that John needs to loose parts of himself so he can be molded into what Ra’s wants him to be.” 

Wayne is staring at him as if he is trying to decide if Barsad is worth trusting.

“Why did you want me to give him the locket?” 

“ I believe you care for him and want to help him. The locket is his and he was forced to give it up. It was time for it to come back to him. I only have the boy’s best interests in mind”.

Wayne looks like he wants to ask more but Barsad knows it would seem suspicious if they are seen talking about this. 

“I must go. I have other business to attend to but watch what is happening here, what is happening to John. If you decide he is not safe here, there are those who will help you.” 

Barsad does not wait for Wayne to speak. He leaves him quickly, hoping he has planted enough doubt in Wayne that he may help to take John from here. 

Days pass and Barsad knows that they will need to make a move soon. Wayne seeks him out sometimes, wanting to know more about what is happening. Barsad gives little pieces of information, enough to satisfy Wayne’s curiosity but not enough to give himself away. Something happens that causes him to have to leave the mountains and he can only hope that when he returns Wayne is willing to help John leave this place. 

*^*^*^*^*  
Robin’s memories all seem blurry around the edges now. He has to try to recall things that used to be so easy to remember, like how he got the scars on his hand. The locket helps him to focus but it all feels like it is slipping away. 

He knows to keep the locket hidden, he can’t remember why he isn’t supposed to have it but he does not want it taken away. Robin carries it with him but he only takes it out when he is alone.

He does not see Bruce as often now. It makes him feel even lonelier. Bruce’s training will be over soon and then he will leave. Robin doesn’t want to be left again. He tries not to think about when he will be all alone again because right now he is with Bruce alone for the first time in about a week. 

Bruce makes him feel better, though lately he has looked worried about something. He has been asking him questions sometimes, questions about his past, about Ra’s, about his medicine. Today, he asks another question.

“Do you want to be here, John?” 

It is the first time in a while he has heard that name and with it a sense of himself comes flooding back. John, John Bird, that is who he is and he had started to think of himself as Robin. He feels so angry right now, so very lost at what is happening to him. 

“No. I do not want to be here but he will not let me leave.” 

“Ra’s?” Bruce asks like he already knows the answer. 

“ He lies. I would have gone with them but he kept me here, said they did not want me.” 

John is angry even though his memories are still blurred. He takes the locket out, needing it right now, Bruce gave it back to him so he can see it. 

Bruce kneels beside him. He puts his hand on John’s, feeling the locket with him. He looks at John and there is worry in his eyes and something else. 

“Where would you go?”

“ I would find them.” John has no doubt that if he could just leave here, he could find them. 

“ And if you couldn’t find them, John? Where then?” 

John does not want to think about not finding them. He has no one besides them, can see himself nowhere but with them but there is perhaps one other place he could go. 

“ Back to Gothom with you.” 

Bruce is the only one he trusts besides them, he doesn’t want to be left here again. 

“ John, I will do what I can to help. I promise.” 

John believes him. He puts the locket away. He will be picked up from here soon. The rest of his short time with Bruce is spent telling him what he can still remember, saying it out loud. He has told Bruce about them before, just a little bit, didn’t even say their names. Now he still doesn’t say their names because they are fuzzy in his head but he tells Bruce about what he can, about what is not as blurred. He almost whispers it, not wanting anyone else to hear it. He tells of her rising from the pit, of being found, of his mask, of how they cared for him. He talks until Bruce hushes him, till it is obvious that it is almost time to go. 

That night he is given more of the injections than usual. His head becomes fuzzy and what Ra’s tells him makes sense until the man leaves. When he is alone, he pulls out the locket and thinks of what he told Bruce, of the promise that was made and he tries to hold onto himself.   
*^*^*^*^*

“ You were not followed? We do not want your loyalties discovered.” 

Talia trusts Barsad as much as she can trust anyone that is not Bane or John, but she still worries. He is their only ally that sees John regularly and if he is discovered they may loose any chance to get him. 

“ I made certain. Now, let me see to the mask and then there is much to discuss.” 

Barsad makes quick work of taking the mask off of Bane. He had examined it when he first came here, doing as much of the repair as he could before its removal. The mask becoming damaged had been an inconvenience but at least now they could make plans in person. 

Bane for his part sits as still as he can despite the agony Talia knows he is feeling right now. Usually when the mask has to be removed to be repaired and the chemicals replaced, he is given a sedative so that he may sleep till it is placed upon him again. He did not wish to sleep as it may mean not being able to plan with them. Barsad can not be here for long. 

Talia holds his hand, tries to soothe him through the worst of it. This pain is almost hers in a way; the scars that cause it are his sacrifice for her. Barsad works quickly and soon the mask is back to a properly working state. 

Talia is glad when Bane’s pain is once again at a manageable level. There are very few people in this world that Talia cares enough about to worry about their wellbeing and knowing when one of them is in pain hurts her in a way as well. She hopes John is safe as much as he can be right now. 

They talk about what can be done. It is a difficult task to get John away from Ra’s. He has been increasing his efforts to have John forget them.

“I have been trying to dilute the drugs as much as possible but he has noticed when they are weakened and has increased the dosages. He allows no one but himself or Wayne around John alone. I will not be able to get close enough to bring him to you.” 

That is a problem they had been aware of for a while. Talia knows Barsad has done as much as he can. He kept John’s locket safe then got it back to him through Wayne, encouraged Wayne to ask John questions, being their eyes in the mountains. They are running out of time in a way, soon Wayne’s training will be over and it is possible that John will be moved again. 

“Wayne is the only way to get access to John. How loyal is he to Ra’s?” 

Bane asks the question they have been thinking about for a while. Barsad has laid ground work with Wayne but Talia is still not sure if she wants to trust the fate of her John to a stranger that was handpicked by her father.

“He is unsure of what is being done to John but he does trust your father or at least who he believes your father to be. I can only give so much information to him with out giving myself away. I have made it clear that there may be somewhere else for John to go but I am unsure if Wayne is willing to trust me yet.” 

“When you return, perhaps you can convince him to try to take John to the village. If we can get him to take John out of the mountains, we may be able bring him home. “ 

Talia is growing anxious, desperate in a way. She has promised to care for him and now he is trapped away from her, being poisoned against those who care for him by her own father. Ra’s betrayal still cuts deeply. 

“And what of Wayne? He may not want to hand John over.”

“He can be seen to. If he will not be an ally, I can break him. It is time for John to be back where he is meant to be.” 

Bane’s words comfort her. The League trained him to be deadly and they are skills that he never hesitates to use if it will benefit her of John in some way. 

Barsad shakes his head at this.

“John cares for him from what I have seen and that may not be the best course of action if he is still confused by Ra’s efforts.”

A small, possessive part of her growls at the idea of John being loyal to someone in her and Bane’s absence. He is theirs. 

“How much of John’s fondness for Wayne has been manufactured by Ra’s?” 

Her words are angry. From what Barsad has told, her father has been trying to make sure John and Wayne have a bond. Talia can guess at his purpose, to give John something to stay for. 

“I can not be certain but I believe at least some of it is genuine. You know I will do all that I can to bring him back to you, sister. Wayne cares for John of that I am certain and we may just have to trust that he cares enough to bring him home.” 

Talia allows Barsad to touch her hand. It is more physical contact than most are allowed. 

“When you return do what you can to get Wayne to take John from there. It may be our only chance. Send word as soon as you can and we will make our way to the village.” 

Where they are now is at least a day journey from the mountains. They have been trying to stay close but far away at the same time but now they need to be near their little bird. Talia knows that something is going to happen soon, she can feel it. She just hopes it is John being able to come home. 

*^*^*^*^*  
All of his careful plans have been burned to the ground along with the compound that houses the League. 

Ra’s is furious but he is alive. Wayne made a mistake in saving him, one he would pay for. Robin is gone but Ra’s is certain he lives. Wayne would not have let him burn and there is no sign of Robin’s death. Ra’s will cleanse Gothom, punish Wayne for his betrayal, and then he will find his heir. Too much time and effert has been put into the boy to give him up and Ra’s can admit he is fond of him. Robin is still his main link to Talia and Ra’s will not loose him. 

Talia still looks for Robin but this perhaps gives him a chance to stop her quest. Barsad was not here for the destruction of the Legue and Ra’s has long started to suspect that the man has been giving his daughter information. He had not exiled him or made his suspicions known as he thought he may be able to use it to his advantage. He makes sure that only a trusted few know the whole story and the rest know a lie that will be given to his daughter in time. 

Ra’s feels a pang of guilt for the pain he knows this will cause her but it fades as he remembers the choice she made. He will focus on Talia more at a latter time for now he plans Gothom’s and Bruce Wayne’s fate.

*^*^*^*^*  
Talia lays in his arms, asleep at last, but he knows that it will not be very restful. She is nude, her body beautiful but he can not enjoy the sight like he should. Bane had taken her moments before, giving into her demand for physical comfort. It was her first time and Bane knows it is not what he wanted for her but in their shared grief he could not deny her. Bane is glad that it at lest provided exhaustion so that she may sleep. He stays awake to mourn in his own way so that he may be strong for her when she awakes.

John is gone; they can not get him back now. Barsad had returned to the League but came back to them soon after. Bane could tell that the news he had brought would not be good. His face is grim as he tells them what he went back to.

“Wayne betrayed the League, burnt it to the ground. He is back in Gothom. Your father lives though his decoy is dead.” 

Barsad pauses then, his body tense. Talia is anxious when she asks the question they are both thinking of.

“What of John? Where is he now?” 

“ When I got there, nothing was left but ruins and a fresh grave that had a very simple marking on it, a drawing of a red bird. I had to find out what happened from rumors, whispers in the village of what Wayne did and that Ra’s is in mourning of his heir. I failed you both. He is gone.” 

Bane feels like he is being torn apart all over again. Talia for her part looks numb. Barsad offers to give them his life for not getting there in time. Bane is angry, would like to take it out on someone, but Barsad has always been faithful to them and they will need him in the future. Talia sends Barsad away for while and then it is just them alone in their chamber. 

His beautiful Talia is wreaked with guilt and pain. Only Bane will be allowed to see it, she will not show this to the rest of the world. Bane wishes he could take all of her pain onto himself, spare her from it. He wishes he could take John’s place if it meant that they would both be alive and safe but he knows nothing has ever came from wishes so he does not dwell on those thoughts. Instead, he comforts her as best as he can and bottles his own pain to deal with later. When she starts to undress herself , he does not stop her even though he feels he should. He can not deny her anything right now.

“Please, he is gone and you are all I have left. I need to know that you are mine.” 

Her voice is as close to pleading as he has ever heard it. 

“ I am yours, always will be.” 

He hopes the words are a comfort. He is as careful with her as he can be. When they finish, he cleans her gently with some warm water and makes a promise. 

“They will suffer for taking him. I may not have been able to keep them from taking him away but they will hurt for this.” 

Talia looks reassured as she lays down next to him. There are still traces of tears on her face and Bane wipes them away. Neither of them mentions how cold the bed feels right now or the fact that they have left space for a third as they always have and soon Talia is asleep and Bane is left awake with his thoughts and a sense of pain that the mask can not get rid of. 

*^*^*^*^*


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, there will be a time skip in here but it shouldn't be too strange. Thanks for reading and please let me know what you think because comments help me write.

*^*^*^*^*  
Bruce knows now that the League could not give him the purpose he had desired. He could not become an executioner and now the mountain fortress lies in ruins and Bruce Wayne is back in Gothom. He just wishes he could have figured it out sooner, gotten John away from there sooner. He tells himself that John is safe now, can have a fresh start but he is not sure if he believes it. 

He had taken Henry to safety, couldn’t let the man die. He had also found John, knocked out under some rumble, but alive. Bruce is not sure what he would have done if the boy had died. John could not be left alone. He had thought of leaving him with Henry but he knows the man is loyal to Ra’s and he does not want John around that any more. Barsad had said something about there being a place for John to go but he was not around and Bruce is not sure if he can be trusted. 

 

He remembers John saying that he would go with Bruce back to Gothom if he couldn’t find who he was looking for. It is something John himself did not seem to remember. In fact, when he had awoken after Bruce took him from the rumble he did not know who Bruce was. Bruce had saved him from burning but had not saved him from the drugs. 

It was not difficult to have John placed in a boy’s home and cover any tracks. The boy’s home he was placed in was one he had been in before. It would be better for him to not be around Bruce. If there are any left of the League, Bruce can make sure that John is not found. It hurts knowing he couldn’t protect him any better than he did. 

Alfred had asked about the boy he had brought back to Gothom and then put in St. Swithin’s discreetly. Bruce told him what he could, his reasons for not keeping John with him. 

“ He wanted to come back to Gothom.” 

“From what you have said , Master Bruce, he wanted to come back with you, not be placed in a home.” 

Alfred looks disapproving, it is a look he can do very well. 

“ He doesn’t remember that. He doesn’t seem to remember much. It is better if he doesn’t. This is a chance for him to have a normal life. If I stay away then the League won’t know he is here.” 

Alfred eventually stops pestering him about it but Bruce knows he still doesn’t quite approve of what Bruce did with John. 

He tries to put John away from his mind. He is safe, being taken care of. Bruce had hoped that maybe a foster family would take him in but none of them worked out. He donates money to the boy’s homes of the city, making sure John will be taken care of. He keeps track of him but he must focus on Gothom right now. 

There are good people in Gothom, Bruce knows this. He needs to bring hope to them. Despite the problems with the League, they were right about the power of symbols. With work, he can make Batman a symbol of justice, a symbol of hope for Gothom. He has to. 

*^*^*^*^*  
John Blake will no longer be put in any foster homes. It is a relief in a way, not having to try anymore. The last few months have been difficult, what having been brought back to St. Swithin’s with no real memory of what happened since he was around seven. He knows someone found him somewhere and then brought him to the home but he doesen’t rembember who it was. He has scars, the most noticeable being on his hands and the marks on the inside of his arms. Junkie marks is what one of his foster parents had said but John doesn’t know how he got them The only possession he had when he was brought back here is a locket that he keeps hidden.. It doesn’t help him remember, there is no picture in it, just a lock of hair John can’t get himself to toss. He is still angry most of the time and there is a sense of loneliness that he can not fill. He practices a smile in the mirror and hopes that no one notices that it is not quite real. 

He hates whenever any one tries to call him Robin. It feels wrong even if it is his first name. The other kids tease him and find him strange and make up stories about what he had been doing in the time he doesn’t remember. John has heard more alien probe stories about himself then he would like. The kids settle down after a while when John does not seem very interesting any more. Batman has taken away the attention.

John is fascinated by him. He collects every piece of information about him that he can. He wonders who he is, why he is doing what he is doing. There are theories of course and John has heard them all. Some of them are easy to dismiss, such as Batman being a vampire or a robot. John is still not sure who he is but he is enjoying the puzzle. It gives him something to think about during the day. 

At night, he dreams. He can not remember them, not really, just snatches of things. A girl’s voice whispering John Bird in his ear, some kind eyes, and a few promises made to him. He feels safe most of the time when he dreams, as if someone is taking care of him, but when he is awake he feels more alone than ever. 

*^*^*^*^*  
The attack damaged Gothom but it did not destroy it and Gothom will survive and become stronger. Bruce feels much the same way about himself, about Batman. He will survive and endure because Gothom needs him. It still hurt to know the truth about Henry, about Ra’s. 

It had been a shock to see him in his house, realizing what had been hidden from him the whole time. John saying Ra’s lies, Henry spending so much time with John, and Barsad’s words about Henry being more loyal to Ra’s goals than Bruce realized, it all in hindsight had been so clear. Hearing the man talk now, Bruce can not believe he allowed himself to be taken in. 

“You should be by my side, my greatest student. You were lost when I found you; I gave you purpose and you left your path and stole something from me. Where have you placed Robin?” 

Ra’s sounds so clam, so matter of fact but Bruce knows that there is some anger in his tone. 

“John is not in Gothom, he does not remember his time there so you have no use for him anymore.” 

Bruce is not even lying; he knows that St. Swithin’s had taken most of the older boys out of town today, a rare trip for them. He is relieved about it right now, no matter what happens tonight, John should still be safe. 

“I will still find him but it may be for the best if you are telling the truth, it would do no good for him to possibly be hurt in the chaos that will come from tonight. Gothom will tear itself apart in fear and with its death much of this society will fall.” 

Ra’s is a fanatic and has many men devoted to his cause. Bruce knows he must fight against what ever the League will try to do here. He is not surprised when Ra’s attacks, leaves him in the manor to burn. Alfred saves him, being there when he is needed like always. 

Bruce and Gothom survive the night, Ra’s does not. The city starts to recover, the manor starts to be rebuilt, and Bruce is Batman but he works on playing the part of billionaire playboy. He visits the boy’s homes of the city and he tells himself it has nothing to do with the thought of John. 

St. Swithin’s is the last one he visits, playing his part the best he can. He sees John watching him, not with recognition but like he is working out a puzzle. Bruce keeps away from him, wanting him to keep this chance at normal but he is glad to see him well. John will endure just as Gothom will and Bruce lets himself have a bit of peace at that thought.  
*^*^*^*^*  
Gothom is still dirty. 

Talia knows many consider it cleaner now, less corrupt, but she can still see all of its filth. It would be cleansed from the earth soon but till that time she must keep up being Miranda. 

Being in Gothom fills her with a sense of anger and guilt and thoughts of her John Bird. She had taken him from here long ago but she had not kept him by her side like she had intended. She does not let herself dwell on his fate more than she has to, uncertain now that it may be. John had been mourned by them for a while, the wounds of their failure of protecting him still very open when her father died, when Wayne had stopped the destruction of Gothom. The League had been leaderless and the few who came back from Gothom searched her out, the only connection to Ra’s left, and so they went back to the mountains. 

Talia remembers going to the grave with Bane. It was the first place they went to when they had returned to the mountains. They needed to see his resting place. Neither cried. It would not change anything and they are unwilling to show any softness in front of these men who were once her father’s, men who are now willing to pledge themselves to her because there is no other choice. One came up to them and told them all that had happened in Gothom and part of the story stood out more to Talia than anything else.

“Despite our efforts, we could not take back what Wayne had stolen. He has hidden him well.” 

After hearing this, Talia had the grave dug up. There was no body, in fact it was completely empty. John did not die here, of this they were certain of, but he was still lost to them. They had no information to go off, no starting point of where Wayne may have taken him. Wayne did not keep John with him and that is all they know. 

They rebuilt the League, Barsad by their side. Bane worked as a mercenary, hired muscle in a way but only so that their own goals could be accomplished easier. Talia went about her tasks differently, often hiding who she was. She built other identities for herself just the way her father had. Miranda Tate being one of the most useful, with that mask she has been able to infiltrate Gothom, put herself in a position of power one that had her near Wayne in a way. 

Wayne had taken much from her, from them, and now the time is nearing for Gothom to fall. It is not as satisfying as she had hoped. With the seeming peacefulness of the city, Wayne had hidden himself away, became a shell of what he was. He had still provided the tools for his own downfall and the time was nearing for it to be complete. 

Talia has not been in this part of Gothom for quite a while. St. Swithin’s looks much like she remembers. She has been avoiding it, not wanting to see this place because it reminds her of finding John but the end for this city will be soon and she wants to remember again. The father shows her the rooms where the children sleep, how crowded they are. As Miranda, she looks sympathetic, while as Talia she knows the condition of this place is just another sign that Gothom needs to fall. The city can not even care for its children. 

The place is noisy and it is obvious that many of the children who are here are considered lost causes. Talia is comforted that she had been able to spare her John from this for at least a little time. The father is talking, trying to show how much needs to be done but also that they are getting by as well as they can. 

“We rely on volunteers mostly to help with any activities we may do. There are a few here today if you would like to meet them.” 

Talia nods her ascent. It makes no difference who she meets but it is important to keep her mask. Miranda Tate is trying to help the poor of this city. 

There are boys outside, playing some sort of game. There is a man with them, one she pays no attention to till the father calls him over by name. 

“Ms. Tate, this is one of our volunteers, Officer John Blake.” 

John Blake, she has not heard that name in a long time. When the man comes over and looks at her, Talia sees familiar eyes staring at her, there is no recognition in them but there is a fire she remembers all too well. Her mask does not slip, she is much too practiced for that. 

He has grown, no longer the boy she had left in the mountains so long age, but a man now. He is polite but Talia can tell that much of his smile is not real. He seems a little hesitant to shake her hand, almost shy, but he lets her take his hand in hers. She can feel that the skin on it is a little rougher, feels like it is scarred. Talia manages to look down and catch a glimpse of his hand before he hides it slightly next to his body. 

It is scarred, marks that look as if hot oil had dripped upon it. They have faded with time but the marks are still vivid on his skin. This is her John Bird, she is certain of it. Wayne had hidden him in plain sight, kept him in Gothom.

She wants to keep him with her for as long as she can, wants to reclaim him right now, but she knows he will just be confused right now, the time isn’t right yet. He has changed from being away from them for so long, is trying to be a part of this city, but she can still see his spirit shinning through. He is still the only beautiful thing she has seen in this place. They talk until he is called away, but Talia watches him till he leaves, not wanting him out of her sight in case this is a dream. 

 

After leaving St. Swithin’s that evening, Talia knows that she must speak with Bane. Their plans may have to change but Wayne will still suffer. Now, however there is chance for them to be whole again, for John to return to his place beside them. Talia will not fail this time, John will be home with them soon. 

*^*^*^*^*


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is a little short but I liked having this part by itself. Please let me know what you think because this story has taken over my brain sort of.

*^*^*^*^*  
The time is coming for everything to fall into place and for Gothom to burn but Bane is not focusing on that as much as he should. Instead, he waits for Barsad to come with news about the task they had the thief do for them. Selina Kyle would soon no longer be useful once Wayne’s fingerprints are secured but for now they take advantage of her skills. Talia is certain and Bane has always trusted her instincts but he must have proof to ease his own doubts. Bane will protect her, if the results end up proving her wrong about the man she saw, than Bane will take care of the problem. 

He looks over the files they have collected the last few days since Talia come from the orphanage. There had been a rare sense of excitement when she had come to him the other night. Talia was not one to show emotions so clearly but there was a rare glitter in her eyes he had not seen in a long time. 

“He is here, alive. Wayne brought him here, he does not seem to remember his past but he still has his fire, I could feel it in the brief moments I had with him.” 

He did not have to ask who she was talking about. Bane could still feel the hole left from John’s loss, a hole that not even Barsad and his devotion could fill. The thought of him being here the whole time they had missed him did not sit well with Bane. John should not be in such a corrupt place. What if this city’s taint had killed the innocence and spirit that drew Talia to him, made him theirs? 

Talia believes his spirit is still mostly intact even if he is trying to serve this corrupted place in a way .From what Talia had said this John that she thinks is theirs is a police officer here. It is not a path Bane would have chosen for him. He should not be defending this city, he should be with them cleansing it. Talia did not seem pleased at his profession either but she talked about him looking after the children with a hint of warmth in her voice that Bane had not heard for a long time. He knew that she had already decided that this Officer John Blake is their John Bird from so long ago but he had to check, he did not want Talia having false hope. He has seen how it poisons and his Talia has already lost so much. 

Barsad should be here soon and then Bane will have the answers he needs. He stares at a photo of the young officer. There is a familiarity in the man’s appearance. Bane can see how Talia thinks this man is grown from the boy they knew. 

John Blake’s history is spread out in front of Bane but there is a note about files being lost, so there is little information about the man from when he was about seven till about fourteen. The information about him before the lost files matches up with their John. It is possible Wayne simply brought the boy back here and did not even change John’s name. Bane would call it foolish but if this is John Bird, Wayne had kept him hidden for such a long time by putting him in the open. 

He stares at the photo and does not look up when he knows Barsad has entered. 

“Is it done? Did the cat manage to get what we needed, Brother?”

One little hair is all that is needed to know the truth. 

“She did and took something for herself as well. She thought it a shiny trinket, nothing more; it was not difficult to take it from her when I saw it. I almost did not run the test but I did and have the results but first I would like to show you what she took.” 

Bane still keeps his focus on the photo as Barsad hands him something. He can feel the weight of it, the feel of metal and the shape and he could see why perhaps Barsad would take this as proof. Bane’s fingers trace the locket. He wonders if John does this, if he feels comforted by the action like Bane does right now. 

“The hair is a match then.”

He would be rather surprised if it is not at this point. The locket, the scars Talia said she saw, the look of him, the lost files, their John Bird is here. Bane should know never to doubt Talia’s instincts. 

“Yes. He was here the whole time. I had assumed that if he was in Gothom that Wayne would have kept him near him but apparently not. He left him to the system here.”

There is a hint of disapproval in Barsad’s voice, one that Bane only hears because he knows him so well. Barsad had thought that Wayne would do what was needed for John and he was proven wrong. Bane knows it is something that has haunted Barsad in a way through the years even if they have all tried to move on from it. Wayne will pay for all that he has done but now there are other things to focus on.

“Can he recover what he has lost?”

It is the main thought that has gone through Bane’s head since the locket was placed in his hand. It would be cruel of fate to dangle their lost one in front of them if they can not truly ever have him back. 

Barsad takes a moment to consider his answer. 

“It could be possible; the memories are more than likely buried rather than lost. It will be difficult, he may think himself loyal to this place, to this system, but with time and certain methods he can return to you.” 

It is an answer with promise. 

“We still proceed as planned but I want him watched, once an opportunity presents itself than he can be brought to us.”

“It has already been done. She has him being observed as well as Wayne.”

Bane is not surprised at Barsad’s words. Talia had been certain. She had longed for John the whole time he had been absent. Bane had seen how she had hardened with out him there. She had lost some of her spark but perhaps now she can regain it. His thoughts of Talia are interrupted by Barsad speaking. 

“I will do as much of the observation myself as possible. I will not fail you again. He will be back where he belongs soon.”

Bane claps Barsad on the shoulder at his words. Barsad is their faithful, the only of their men that they are affectionate with. He has proven his devotion again and again and Bane knows that he will do all that he can to bring John back to them. Bane is counting on Barsad’s loyalty now. 

“I have always counted on you, brother and I may need to ask you something that she will not approve of. Talia is willing to burn here and I was willing to allow it but that was before we knew about our chance to give her back what she has lost. There may need to be a martyr to burn with the filth and I am willing to sacrifice myself but I would have them live. If it must happen, I would have you take them from here and serve as protector in my place.” 

It is something Bane has thought about since Talia had spoken about finding John at St. Swithin’s. The idea of John being found and returned to them, of Talia regaining a part of herself, but then it would all burn in this city saddened him. Gothom deserves the flames but they do not. There would need to be someone here to make sure that all their plans came to be and there are few that Talia would trust to see it through. Bane would see it to its end for her but he would not leave his little ones with out a protector and Barsad is the only one who could take such a task. 

Barsad looks shocked but also flattered. He should be, the task he is asking him to possibly take he would not give to just anyone. His voice has a hint of awe in it but also a bit of sadness.

“ I know you would give all for them. There may be other ways but if it is needed, I will do all in my power to do what you have asked. For now, I must go and see to other work but I will keep in mind your request.”   
Barsad leaves after giving Bane’s hand a slight squeeze, a touch that reinforces what his words said. Bane knows it is selfish of him in a way to plan this but he does not want them to fall with Gothom if it can be avoided. He puts that thought aside and thinks about how they will go about getting John back. 

Bane knows they will have to be patient. John is lost in a way right now. He will be confused at first, may think himself loyal to this place, but John was always Talia’s and Bane will just have to have faith that he will be again. 

*^*^*^*^*


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So have some more. I will be playing with the timeline of the movie a bit but nothing too crazy. Hope you enjoy.

*^*^*^*^*  
His locket has gone missing. 

There are much bigger things to worry about right now, the dead kid from the sewers, Gordon being shot, the possibility of an army underneath Gothom, but still John wants to know what happened to his locket. He used to carry it around all the time but he stopped as he got older. He had kept it his dresser draws and hadn’t taken it out for a long time. The other day he went for it and it was not there. He wanted to touch it because it always makes him feel better. It made him think maybe one day he could remember how he got it. 

John had started to think his past was lost to him. He could remember bits of his early childhood but the later stuff but before he was a teenager , he could not recall. His dreams even went away for a bit. Just the other week they had started again. He thought maybe it had been due to his brief conversation with Ms. Tate when she had visited the orphanage the other day. She had asked a few questions about his past and it must have made his mind dwell on it. He can’t think about his missing past right now, Gothom may be in trouble and it seems no one wants to help it. There is only one person John thinks may listen to him, Bruce Wayne, Batman.

It was one of the most nerve wracking moments John had ever experienced knocking on that door. How exactly are you supposed to act when you show up at a billionaire’s house and are going to tell him that you know he is Batman and it is time to put on the suit again? It is not exactly a common social situation. John decides that confident police officer who knows something is the best way to approach it. It gets him into the door. 

John is sure the butler, Alfred, knows everything, the help usually does but this guy seems like he would know everything anyway. He takes John to a room that he calls a study but that may be bigger than John’s whole apartment. 

“ I will inform Master Wayne that you are here to see him, Officer…?”

“John Blake.” 

John almost thinks he sees the man’s eyes widen slightly but he does not know why his name should matter. He is pretty sure he is not very important in the grand scheme of things. 

He sits down where the man gestures and waits. John is tying not to feel too nervous but he is in Batman’s house so he figures nerves are ok to have. As soon as he feels somewhat clam, Bruce Wayne enters the room. 

John has thought about Bruce Wayne , replayed how he looked when he came to St. Swithin’s so many times in his head, has looked at so many pictures. He told himself he was merely fascinated by the man but in truth it may have been a bit of a crush. The man has changed but he still looks better than most people. He looks worn out, though, John can see it in the way he walks into the room, and he looks like he has given up on something. 

He sounds so causal when he asks what he can do. John tells him of the commissioner and then cuts right to the chase. 

“ What he needs is you, what he needs is Batman.” 

Wayne looks a little surprised at that but plays it off. John thinks most people would buy his reaction but John is not most people. 

“If Gordon thinks I’m Batman, he must be bad off.” 

“ Look Gordon, doesn’t know or care who you are but we met before.” 

That seems to get Wayne’s attention more than anything John has said up to this point. 

“ When I was a kid.” And John almost thinks that Wayne looks guilty about something but John is not sure what. “At the orphanage.” 

With that Wayne seems to relax about and John tells him his story, not about the past he can’t remember but about his parents, the anger, figuring out who Batman was. He thought it would be harder to tell him all this but talking to Wayne seems easy, safe in a way. He starts to finish up.

“ I don’t know why you took the fall for Dent’s murder but I’m still a believer in the Batman even if you’re not.” 

Batman is one of the only things John has ever been able to believe in. 

Wayne moves forwards, closer to John. John can not help but get a little excited standing so close to Batman. 

“Why did you say your boys’ home used to be funded by the Wayne Foundation?”

There is genuine confusion in is his voice and John realizes it is not just Batman he has stepped away from, it is his life in general. 

“Because the money stopped. Might be time to get some fresh air and start paying attention to the details. Some of those details might need your help.” 

He just needs him to understand, this city depends on him. 

“So how is the boys’ home managing now?” 

The question stops John from leaving, not because of its importance but more because Wayne still wants to talk to him it seems and John doesn’t want to stop talking to him quite yet. 

“As well as it can. Miranda Tate has started to donate a bit, even visited a few times.” 

“ I hear she is lovely.” 

The way Wayne says that makes it sound like something that had been the cause of a debate. John is not sure what to make of that so he just answers with the truth. 

“She is.” 

John has spoken with her a few times and there is just something about her that draws him to her. She seems interested in speaking with him, even though all their interactions have been brief, and her smile is beautiful. 

“Look, Officer Blake…”

“Call me John.” 

He just blurts it out but it does not seem to faze Wayne that much. 

“John, I am not sure if I can do what you are asking. Batman went away for a reason.” 

“ All I am saying is that maybe you should check into things a bit, Mr. Wayne.”

“ You can call me Bruce.”

For some reason, that gives John a sense of familiarity. 

“ Bruce, just look into things.” 

Wayne, Bruce looks at his face for a moment as if trying to determine something. 

“ Leave your number in case there is something I need to know later.” 

John tries not to blush as he writes down his number, it is not like Bruce asked for his number to call for personal reasons. He leaves feeling like maybe he accomplished what he came here to do. 

*^*^*^*^*  
Bruce watches John leave. It had been so strange to see him here, after so many years. Bruce could see so many traces of the boy he once knew. He thought that maybe John’s memories had come back, that he was here to confront Bruce about everything. The talk of Batman had been unexpected but John had always seemed to see more than most people. 

John is a man now, a police officer. Bruce can just imagine Ra’s rage at such a thing, the one he had decided was his heir becoming a sworn protector of Gothom. The uniform looked good on him and Bruce wonders how long he has been on the force. He had stopped keeping track of John after a few years. There had always been a temptation to seek him out and Bruce did not think it would be good to be in his life. John had a clean slate and Bruce did not want him to remember things that may be best forgotten. Now, though John has appeared in Bruce’s life and told him of danger that might be here for Gothom. 

He is drawn out of his thoughts of John by Alfred clearing his throat. 

“ Am I correct in assuming that is the John Blake that you brought back to Gothom, Sir?”

Bruce just nods. Alfred already knows the answer, he just wants Bruce to answer it anyway. Bruce answers Alfred’s unspoken question as well.

“He still doesn’t remember. He came here and told me that he knows I’m Batman and that there may be trouble brewing.” 

Alfred raises a brow at his words. There is a speculative look in his eyes.

“He seems to have grown into quite a clever and nice young man.” 

Nice young man is spoken with the same tone of voice Alfred has used when referring to Miranda Tate as lovely. Bruce decides not to think about that and instead changes the subject by asking for Alfred to find information about Bane. He also asks about the foundation and finds out the state of his business. Bruce had hidden away from the world after Rachael’s death but it may be time to start looking at it again.

He goes and sees Fox, hears about how lovely Miss Tate is. He may have to see her at some point, find out if she is worth trusting. He sees Gordon. The man is in rough shape but he can still see all the strength in him. They talk about the lie, about the possible trouble that may be coming and Bruce tells him how he is unsure if Batman exists any more.   
“ He must. He must.” 

Gordon says it with so much belief. Bruce doesn’t say anything after that, makes no promises, just leaves Gordon quick like he always has. It hurts quite a bit to move the way he is and he knows he needs to start using the brace Fox gave him. 

The cave still smells dusty that night as he sits in it. He has been down here recently to research Kyle but now he looks at his uniform. John’s words echo in his head and his hands holds a cell phone and a piece of paper with a phone number on it. John came to him but he still doesn’t remember what happened before, how Bruce had failed him once and it would be best if he has little interaction with him. He knows he shouldn’t but he finds himself dialing the number on the piece of paper.

He gets ready to hang up on the fifth ring when a sleepy voice speaks.   
“Hello, who is this? It is late, better be a good reason to call.” 

Bruce tells himself he does not find John’s grumpiness adorable. He doesn’t give his name, just asks the question that has been in his mind most of the night.

“ Why are you so certain Batman can help now?” 

“Bruce?”

The voice sounds more awake now and continues after a few seconds when there is no confirmation of who is speaking. 

“He always has. He came to Gothom when he was needed, when most had given up. I don’t think he would give up on Gothom even if Gothom may have given up on him. I haven’t given up on the Batman.” 

There is certainty in those words. Bruce is reminded of how John had sounded so long ago when he had spoken of his mysterious them, how sure he was that they would not have left him. He says the only thing he can think of in this moment.

“ I can’t promise anything but I will try.” 

He hangs up before John can answer. That night, when he goes to sleep for the first time in a long time it is not Rachael’s eyes that he sees in his dreams. It is the eyes of a young boy he knew so long ago, a young boy who is now a man that Bruce wants to get closer to even if he knows he shouldn’t.   
*^*^*^*^*


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, I haven't had a comment on this fic in a while but I hope people are still reading it. Here is some more.

*^*^*^*^*  
It will not be long till Talia has control of Wayne’s business but she has found herself focusing on other things since discovering John again. She had known it was him from the moment she saw him but she could understand why Bane had sought out proof. He had blamed himself in many ways for their separation from John and she knows he did not want her to become attached to the idea of having him back if it was not him. The hair was a match. 

John had kept the locket for all these years. They will return it to him when the time is right. She has been to St. Swithin’s a few times since her first visit, all times that she knew John would be there. She has kept their conversations casual but she enjoys their brief encounters, enough that he has seen her real smile a few times. It is strange how familiar he l seems and yet different all at the same time. He is still her John bird in so many ways and it pains her when she remembers how much time they have had to spend apart. 

Talia can tell he is lonely. He does not say much about himself if he can help it but she knows from the little he has said that he really doesn’t have anyone in his life that he could call a lover or family. She is torn between being glad that he has not found anyone to replace them and angry that her little bird has been left alone all this time. They had found his files or at least the few files of his that exists and they tell a tale of Wayne leaving him to St. Swithin’s. Talia thinks that in a way she might have understood, perhaps even have been able to forgive Wayne, if he had taken John here and kept him but now there is mostly anger towards him that he took what is theirs and did not even appreciate him enough to keep him safe, to take care of him. Wayne will hurt for that, Talia will make certain of it. 

This moment she is not focusing on Wayne, instead she is heading to the orphanage to catch John right before he leaves. She checks in with the father first to make it seem like that is the reason for her visit before going to find John. He spends a majority of his time here when he is not working as a police officer. She is not happy about his career but she is not surprised. When he first came with her, he told her that he had hoped to be a police officer when he was younger, before she found him. It had been the cause of their first fight. 

“Why would you want to be one of them? Father says that they are corrupt, a sign of the weakness of the system.” 

Talia has only been out in this world for a short time but from what she has seen the police do no good for most people. The law did not prevent her mother from being placed in that pit, the law did not save Bane from being put in the pit for crimes he did not do, the law did not keep John’s family alive. The law just hides injustice and the police help it to do such. She does not like the idea of her John wanting to do that with his life. He is hers now and he will help her in the League when they are old enough. John looks at her when he answers her question.

“They can do good. They help people. Not every one of them is bad. They keep the law so people don’t get hurt.” 

John is so earnest but his defending what her father tells her is a broken system angers Talia. She lashes out with her words. 

“The police did not help your father. They let him die and left you all alone.” 

Her words hurt him she can tell. He is angry at her, tries to hit her. She is too quick for it to land and he looks ashamed at what he tried to do. He says nothing, just leaves the room. She waits a little bit but he does not return. She worries that he will try to leave. He stays away from her the rest of the day but she sees glimpses of him and she allows that to reassure her that he will stay here. That night is the first night he does not eat dinner with her and father, instead father says that John would not dine with them because he does not feel well. Talia lays down that night worried that she has ruined something. John climbs in next to her but he does not touch her. His words break through the silence.

“I am sorry I tried to hit you. I was angry but I shouldn’t hit you. Will you send me away?”  
Talia wraps her arms around him at the apology. 

“No, you are going to stay here with me. I am sorry my words hurt you.” 

It is the truth in a way. She is not sorry that she said them, she thinks he needed to hear them but she is sorry she cause him pain. 

Talia remembers that first fight so very well. It does her no good to dwell in the past when now she needs to focus on spending time with John so that her presence may trigger something. She sees him with some of the boys and he looks so tired, she knows that he is trying to investigate the commissioner’s shooting, running himself ragged while doing so. When he sees her, she can tell the small smile is genuine. She watches as he bids farewell to the boys and makes his way to her. 

“Hello, Miss Tate. Just checking up on the place?” 

He is still so polite and formal with her most of the time. If only he would remember then he would feel no reason to call her by a title. She wishes he would call her dew drop again. For now she must settle for getting him to call her by her false first name. 

“Please, John, call me Miranda. I was just speaking with the Father. Are you leaving? I was getting ready to go get a coffee, would you like to join me?” 

She can see his eyes brighten slightly at the idea of fresh caffeine though he looks like he may not take her up on her offer. 

“I have a few hours but I should go get ready for my shift. ” 

“ I promise not to take up too much of your time. It will be my treat.” 

It takes a few more moments of gentle prodding but soon they are walking to a small coffee shop near by. They talk as they go nothing of real importance but Talia is just enjoying having him near her once again. It does not escape her notice how close he walks to her, how anytime someone who looks suspicious comes near them, he angles his body so that she is blocked from their sight. He has always been protective. 

The coffee shop is small and there are not very many people at this time. Talia orders coffee and looking John over once again some muffins and she pays before John can offer to. There is a small table away from everyone else that they sit at. John says thank you when she gives him the muffin before starting to eat it. 

Their conversation is light so Talia watches him as he eats and as she picks at her own muffin. He has grown handsome as he has gotten older just as she knew he would. He is still soft in many ways, still so sweet , and Talia can see his anger still. He hides it but Talia knows masks and she knows the child this man used to be and so she can read him well.   
John has finished his muffin and so Talia slides her own mostly uneaten one to him. He needs to eat more, she is sure of it. 

“I don’t need that.” 

He pushes it back to her but that is when his stomach lets out a small growl. Talia sees his face blush slightly in embarrassment when she gives it back to him.

“I will not be able to finish and it seems that you may need to eat a little bit more. Someone should start to take better care of you.”

It sounds like a tease but Talia is not pleased with how little care John seems to receive. He is giving so much to this place and is given very little back. 

“I can take care of myself. I’m not a puppy, you know.” 

John grumbles this but starts to eat the muffin. Talia stills at the familiar words, ones that were spoken so long ago, and she has to stop her self from calling him her sweet bird. She does not want to reveal things too soon in case he gets spooked. She is brought out of her thoughts by John saying that he should get back so that he can get ready for his shift. They walk back to St. Swithin’s and soon John is off for his shift while Talia prepares for Miranda’s fund raiser. 

Talia has always been a bit bored by these events but they are necessary to keep up her mask. She would much rather being spending her time trying to get John to remember but they are so close to getting vengeance against Wayne that she must keep up her charade right now. She is surprised when the focus of many of her plans shows up. 

“Bruce Wayne at a charity ball?”

She puts a little shock in her voice but some of it is real. She knows that John had visited Wayne. They are both being watched and they had taken the Harvey Dent celebration as a chance to bug some of the more public areas of Wayne Manor. She had heard John encourage Wayne to get out and about and looks like he had taken the advice. Talia is sure they can make it work to their advantage somehow. 

They banter for a bit. Talia can see through Wayne but she must admit that his mask is a good one. John had seen through it as well. Her little bird had always been clever. Wayne has a charm about him, Talia can see it. She can see how John could have been drawn to him. She leaves him after a while certain that she has intrigued him. It is necessary for her to get his attention so that she can have control over the board soon. Just a little while longer and Wayne and Gothom can start suffering for all they have done to her, all they have done to them. 

*^*^*^*^*  
John waits for whatever Bruce may end up doing but he is still trying to help as much as he can till Batman returns. He is tired when he gets off his shift and does not have much to show from it. Sometimes, he wonders if the police really ever help the city at all. 

His bed is not the best in the world but it feels wonderful when he lies down. It does not take long till he is asleep.

John dreams. 

He is not sure where he is but there is a girl with him. He can not remember her name but she feels familiar. John is young in this dream, he is only a little older than seven. The girl is showing him something, a lamp of some sort. There is oil that she puts it in. As she does so, she talks about how in the pit only a few had lamps and how her protector broke someone’s arm when they tried to take theirs one day they had left their cell for a few moments. The girl is pretty. Her hair is short, like it had been cut really short at some point and has just started to grow back. She looks only a few years older than John. She shows John how to light the lamp so that the oil burns bright. 

John sees her blow out the lamp and John starts to try to light it. The girl stands really close to him, trying to give him instructions. She jostles him at one point and he drops the lamp. It spills hot oil on his hand before it hits the floor. The pain hurts so much but he does not want to cry in front of her, does not want her to think he is a baby and not want him here anymore. The girl quickly calls out to her father who comes and help. Soon in the dream, John’s hand is bandaged and the pain is less. He lays in a bed now, the girl next to him. She kisses his bandaged hand.

“It will heal soon, John bird.”

John feels comforted by her words. When he wakes the next morning, he traces the scars on his hand and wonders who that girl is and where she is now.


	12. Chapter 12

*^*^*^*^*  
Bruce tries not to think of John after the phone call but it is proving difficult. He tries to distract himself from the idea of contacting John. He tracks down Selina and ends up getting his car stolen. He also meets Miranda Tate that night. Everybody is right when they have said she is lovely and Bruce can see she has a sharp mind as well. Even all that is not enough to keep his mind off of John. So the next day he does something that is not usually in character for him, he goes and reports his car missing. 

Of course, he could have just called but he had managed to find out John’s shifts and so now he is at the station just as John has desk duty. There are murmurs as he walks around the station. It has been a while since Bruce Wayne has been out in public so he is expecting a bit of a reaction, after all his appearance last night had been in all the papers. 

John for his part does not do much when Bruce sits across from him to file his report. He just looks at him all business like but Bruce can see a little bit of curiosity in his eyes. 

“So Mr. Wayne, what can I do for you today?” 

Bruce can play along like this is their first meeting. 

“Please call me Bruce. Officer Blake is it?”

He looks at John’s name tag as he says this, then lets his eyes gaze over his face. 

“Yes. All right Bruce, what do you need today?”

There seems to be a bit of blush when John says his name and Bruce should not feel as flattered by it as he does. John is a bit younger than him, hell Bruce knew him as a kid even if John doesn’t remember, he shouldn’t be checking him out. 

“My car was stolen last night at a charity gala and I thought that perhaps I should report it.” 

“I had heard you were out and about. It is big news that you were out last night even though it seemed nobody could get a picture.”

There is a twinkle in John’s eye when he says this as if he knows that Bruce had something to do with the lack of photographic evidence of his return to society. Bruce allows a small smirk to grace his face. 

“Cameras are tricky things. You never know when they may stop working.”

John passes him a form and Bruce fills it out. He does not really put anything down that will lead to Selina Kyle being arrested. He can at least admit to himself that he is here to see John more than anything else. 

“Is this all, Mr. Wayne?”

John looks over the forms, his face looking somewhat bored like a police officer dealing with Bruce Wayne may look. For as earnest as John seems, Bruce can tell he wears a bit of a mask just as he told him when he came and saw him. He wonders what John’s real smile looks likes now. He remembers the one he had when he was younger, as rare as it had been; it had been a nice smile. These are dangerous thoughts. He is interrupted from them by John speaking.

“You haven’t put down your licenses plate number.” 

“Ah, just can’t remember it. I have it written down somewhere at home. Can I take the forms with me? I can return them or perhaps someone can come by.” 

Forgetful playboy is a part he knows how to play well even if it has been a while. John plays along even if he knows that it is not the truth.

“If you insist but it will be a while before we can do anything.” 

Bruce nods, says his goodbyes and leaves the station with the papers. He knows that he has just invited John back to the manor in a round about way and that he should keep his distance. He tells himself he is just interested in what John might know about Gordon’s shooting that it has nothing to do with wanting to see him, wanting to know how much of the boy he remembers is still there.

He waits for John, tries out the knee brace Fox gave him. It hurts but he is moving better. Alfred tells him what he knows about Bane and the information is interesting. The fact that he is working with Daggett means that Bruce Wayne may be targeted but it is the rumors that he speaks of that make something stir in Bruce’s gut, a slight feeling of dread.

“There is a prison, in a more ancient part of the world. A pit. Where men are thrown to suffer and die. But sometimes, a man rises from the darkness. Sometimes, the pit sends something back.”

He has heard Alfred speak in this tone of voice before, when they had discussed Joker. He is worried but if Bane is a danger then Bruce will take care of him. He listens as Alfred tells more about the rumors, about Bane’s origins. Something seems familiar about the story Alfred starts to tell of a babe born in a prison, that grows to escape somehow. When he mentions Bane being trained by Ra’s the dread in his gut is a firm knot, one he is doing his best to ignore. 

“Bane was in the League of Shadows.”

“Till he was excommunicated and a man considered too extreme for them is one that is not to be trifled with.” 

This starts a small argument. Bruce gets Alfred’s concerns but the city needs Batman. Alfred talks about the city needing him as Wayne more but Bruce knows he has failed when he tried that path. 

“You can fail as Bruce Wayne, as Batman you can not afford to.” 

Alfred’s voice is almost pleading. There is a sound of the doorbell and Bruce knows that it must be John. 

“That’s what you are afraid of, that if I go back out there I might fail. We need to go upstairs.” 

As he starts up the stairs, he pretends not to hear Alfred’s reply.   
Alfred is all business when he lets John in and Bruce is glad for it. Alfred goes to makes them tea like it is just some standard visit and not as strange as it really is. Bruce thinks he misses having people in the manor who are not the help or here for some charity event Bruce won’t show his face at. John is not in his uniform right now and it makes this visit seem more personal in a way.

“So I have feeling that those forms are not going to be returned. What did you want to talk about?” 

John cuts right to the chase when Alfred leaves, doesn’t even wait for them to sit down somewhere. He had been that way in the mountains from what Bruce remembered. It reminded him of Rachael at the time and it still does and that hurts in a way. 

“I saw Gordon. Is anything being done about his suspicions?” 

It will not do any good to beat around the bush with John. 

“Most of the men aren’t worried. They act like there is nothing left to do here but there is still a lot wrong with Gothom. You can’t stop at just one problem, you have to fix the system. I don’t know, maybe the system needs to fall sometimes so something better can come from it.” 

There is conviction in those words and frustration. They aren’t Ra’s words but they could be close, could be twisted perhaps into Ra’s ways. Bruce wonders how much of Ra’s training, how much of his conditioning remains, if it still effects him even if he can’t remember it. It is a chilling thought that John could still not be free of his past. Bruce tries not to dwell on that, focuses on how John is now. Before Bruce can say anything to John, Alfred arrives and tells them their tea is ready. He leads them both to it.

Alfred has put the tea in one of the drawing rooms. It is smaller than the study, more intimate in a way. He has already pulled out two chairs at the table, the two that are closest together. It almost feels like a setup date in a way, the nicely laid out tea and scones and the view to the garden. Bruce is wondering if his thoughts towards John are broadcasted on his face more than he realized or if Alfred is just getting desperate in his attempts to get Bruce some companionship. He gives Alfred a look as John sits down, one that Alfred does not respond to. He just simply tells John to help himself and that he can be reached if they need anything before making his exit. 

Bruce feels a bit awkward right now and he can tell John does as well though he seems to enjoy the scone he has started to eat. Maybe the best course of action would be just to talk for now.

“I’m looking into Bane but can’t do much till he is found or he makes a move. So you figured out who Batman was, did you tell anyone before you told me?” 

John shakes his head as he starts to say no before realizing his mouth is full. He swallows quickly before he speaks. Everything comes out in a rush as if he is trying to tell Bruce before he starts accusing him of something. 

“No, it was no one’s business and I don’t think they would have believed me anyway. There were always so many theories about Batman and everyone thought theirs was right. I asked Gordon if he wondered about who you were, may have told him if he had wanted to know, but he didn’t seem to want to know.”

John shrugs at that, like he can’t understand someone not wanting to know something so big. Bruce remembers all the questions he used to ask, all the curiosity, and he wouldn’t be surprised if John is still like that, still wants to know everything he can. 

“So was it only my smile that gave me a way? It seems to fool most people.” 

Bruce knows that John is not most people, could tell from that first moment he saw him, that he was special. 

“I had been collecting things about you, about Batman and when you came as Bruce Wayne and I saw the show you put on, it made sense. Batman was a mystery and I had wanted to solve it so I wouldn’t focus on my own.”

John seems to still at his last sentence as if he had said something he didn’t mean to. Bruce can’t help but ask even though he is sure of the answer.

“Your own mystery and what might that be?” 

There is hesitation in John’s eyes. Bruce knows that this is not the best idea, asking John questions, spending time with him, but he can not help but want to be near him in a way, want to get to know this man who grew from that lonely and angry boy he met in the mountains. John’s eyes lose that look of uncertainty and his voice is soft and has a bit of sadness and pain to it when he starts to speak.

“I have a chunk of time missing. I ran from a foster family and was missing for years until I was found injured and someone brought me to St. Swithins. I just remember waking up there but had no idea how I got there or why. I have dreams sometimes, things that feel like memory but I can’t really remember them when I wake.”

He watches John as he talks, as he rubs the crook of his arm where there may still be a mark from a needle being placed there repeatedly, as he shifts, touches the scars on his hand. Bruce knows that he should tell John the truth but he can’t do it, doesn’t want to face what the truth could bring. Instead, he puts his hand on John’s shoulder. John doesn’t move, doesn’t shake his hand off.

“Maybe one day you will remember.” 

It feels strange to say that when he knows some of John’s past and will not tell him right now. Bruce has kept their shared past secret for so long, stayed away for so long, he doesn’t even know how he could bring it up. His fingers move slightly on John’s shoulders, just a little brush of contact. 

“Maybe.”

John sounds both hopeful and doubtful all at once. His eyes seem to glance at Bruce’s hand and there is a look in them that Bruce tries not to think about. Bruce can feel the heat of his body through his shirt and the thought of feeling more of that heat causes him to pull his hand away. John has a brief flash of something that almost looks like disappointment in his eyes before he starts speaking again.

“Why did you go to the police station today? You could have called like you did the other night. Was it just to have me come here, to ask me if I told anyone?”

It is a question Bruce is not sure how to answer. He takes a moment, thinks it over. 

“I just wanted you to know that I thought about what you said, about looking into details. If the city needs Batman, he will be there if he can.”

There is a small smile on John’s face just for a moment. It looks nice, makes some of the doubts leave Bruce. Without quite realizing it, Bruce has leaned towards John while he spoke. They are close now, so very close, and all it would take is to move just a little bit more and he could kiss him. He shouldn’t, he knows he shouldn’t and he is not sure which of them moves but for just the briefest of moments, their lips meet. It is not a full kiss, just barely a brushing of lips. They both pull away. Before either can say a word, Alfred enters the room.

“Will you need anything else?”

The words are spoken politely but Bruce knows that Alfred can sense that something happened right before he got there. He has a way of knowing things. 

John seems embarrassed if the way he avoids looking at Bruce is an indication. He gets up out of his chair quickly, suddenly in a hurry.

“Thanks for the tea and well, looking into things but I should head out. Um, have a nice evening.” 

He rushes out of the room and Bruce lets him go. Alfred is now staring at him, too much knowledge in those eyes. Bruce could never get away with anything with Alfred around.

“Do you plan to tell him what you know? It seems you may want him around more often.” 

Bruce bristles a bit at the question. 

“There is no reason to tell him, he doesn’t remember and that keeps him safe and besides he is only here because of what is going on with Gothom.”

 

He leaves the room before Alfred can say anymore. If he checks the feeds of the traffic light camera near John’s apartment that night in the cave it is only to make sure that he got home ok, nothing more. At least that is what he tells himself. 

*^*^*^*^*  
He kind of kissed Bruce Wayne, his lips touched Batman’s lips. This thought keeps repeating itself in his head after he leaves the manor. It just happened, one moment they were so close to each other and then their lips were touching. He knows he rushed out of there but he wasn’t sure if he could talk to Bruce for another moment without wanting to kiss him again, more of a kiss this time. 

He makes it back to his apartment. It always feels lonely here, all by himself. Sometimes he hated the boy’s home because it was so crowded but he has also always felt like he shouldn’t be alone either. He has tried dating various people but it has never quite worked out. He never felt comfortable enough with anyone to tell them about his whole missing years of memory stuff and after a while they just didn’t want to be with someone who did not share more of their past than he did. In fact, Bruce is the first person he has told. 

John trusts him. It is a strange thing that he trusts him so much after really only talking to him a few times but he feels like he knows him in a way. It is not just the fact that he knows he is Batman, there is more to it than that. He feels safe around him, something he does not feel around very many people, Miranda being one of the only others. 

He looks over some of his notes from the last few days before going to bed. He has never felt right sleeping alone but he doesn’t really have much choice. For a moment, he imagines what it would feel like for Bruce to be in bed with him. It is not even sex he is really thinking about, more just being close to him. He drifts off to sleep with that thought in his head. 

*^*^*^*^*


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, so this part is very short but I should have more up super soon like in the next day or so and I realized if I waited to post till then that it would be a super massive chapter and I thought this had a good stopping point so here it is but just know that there will be more very soon.

*^*^*^*^*  
Bane made himself seen and Bruce had returned to the cowl. Even with Batman’s return, whatever Bane did at the stock exchange seemed to be successful and if Selina Kyle is to be believed had something to do with his finger prints. Bane seems to be hired muscle for Dagget and nothing more. 

Selina Kyle is interesting and may be able to help him if needed. Her cost is high, a program that could erase her from all records, a program he has to keep it out of the wrong hands. He just needs to decide if she wants it for the right reasons. That is something he will need to think about soon. 

He is back in the cave and as soon as he is, Alfred is on him. Bruce knows he is worried but he doesn’t need the man to worry about him. Every point Alfred tries to make Bruce counters it. The police can’t be trusted and when Alfred mentions John, he is stumped for a moment as he does trust John. 

“He is just a rookie, no real influence to change things yet. You thought I didn’t have it in me anymore.” 

Alfred’s face looks even more anxious but determined as he answers, as he tells Bruce that he doesn’t have it, when he asks Bruce what he will do when he comes up against Bane.

“I will fight harder, I always have.” 

It is the simple truth. 

“When you had something to fight for. What do you fight for now? Not your life.” 

Alfred’s voice carries both anger and sadness as it draws his attention to the tape of Bane at the exchange.

“Take a good look. At his speed, his ferocity, his training. I see the power of belief. Of the fanatic. I see the League of Shadows resurgent.”

He can admit that Bane has had training. A man that size could not be able to move so quick without it but there is no way that the League of Shadows still exists. It died with Ra’s and he says as much to Alfred

“But who leads them now?” 

“John was supposed to but he isn’t. The League was beaten when Ra’s was. Bane is just a mercenary and we have to find out what he is up to.”

Alfred looks like he is going to say more but when the drive shows trades made by Bruce’s fingerprint, he does not say much. When Bruce tells him to give it to Fox, he says it is the last thing he will do for him as Batman. Bruce can feel something cut him inside, a hot knife of guilt and a feeling that he is about to lose one of the few things he still has. Bruce tries to explain to him that any life he could have had beyond the cowl died with Rachael. At the mention of her promise to him, Alfred has his own look of guilt. Bruce feels hot anger burn through him at Alfred’s confession. 

“You had no right to keep something like that secret. Why would you do that?” 

“To spare you pain. Isn’t that why you won’t tell John the truth? I am doing what you seem to not be able to do and I am sorry. I know what this means”

The mention of John makes the anger flare more and there is guilt around the edges of it but he ignores it

“Sorry, you destroy my world and say sorry? What does this mean?” 

Alfred looks for once like all of his years, worn out and weary and it almost makes Bruce soften towards him. 

“It means your hatred. It means loosing someone I have cared about for his whole life but it also means you may live.”

Bruce knows that Alfred means it but he can’t stop. This is all he has left.

“Goodbye, Alfred.”

Alfred looks like he may have preferred Bruce to have punched him in the gut but Bruce can see when his resolve strengthens. 

“Goodbye, Bruce. No matter what happens you should tell him the truth.” 

He avoids Alfred after that and the next morning he is gone. It feels wrong for him not to be there but there are more pressing concerns like making sure Dagget does not get his company. He shows the reactor to Miranda, the only choice he has and soon the company is no longer in his hands. He is surprised when John shows up but he takes the man’s offered ride and tries to ignore Alfred’s words repeating in his head. 

*^*^*^*^*  
John still can’t believe that Batman is back. It is like a dream come true in a way. Not only is Batman back but he is currently sitting in John’s car. Having Bruce so near him is making him a bit nervous. 

It has been a few days since the kiss incident, which John had done a fairly decent job about not thinking about. There were tunnel maps to look through and John’s dreams are starting to be a little easier to remember once he is awake. Details are super fuzzy right now but he can remember feelings and blurred outlines of events and a girl that was with him. Some of the dreams seem to have someone with the girl as well but their face is still a mystery when he wakes up and all he can really recall is that their eyes are kind and that they made him feel safe. 

Right now he is not thinking about his dreams but more what he should about Bruce Wayne in his car. He offered him a ride but he didn’t expect him to take it. 

“So when you began, why the mask?”

It is the first thing he can think to really say. He had always wondered about it. 

“To protect those I care about.” 

The answer makes sense but John feels like there has to be more to it than that.

“You’re a loner with no family.”

It is a blunt statement because John has never been very good at sugarcoating the truth. Bruce seems to take no offense to it even if his voice sounds a little sad as he speaks.

“There are always people you care about. You just don’t realize how much until they’re gone.”

John wonders who he is talking about but it doesn’t feel right to ask. Bruce continues speaking. 

“The idea was to be a symbol. Batman could be anybody, that was the point.”

The idea of symbols is something John has always found fascinating. 

“Symbols hold power. You can kill a man but a symbol is harder to.” 

There is a glint that almost looks like worry or something in Bruce’s eyes when John says this. John decides to not dwell on the topic of symbols anymore and goes back to that of the Batman. 

“It was great seeing him back.”

“Not everyone was happy to see him back.”

Bruce sounds resigned. 

“They’ll figure it out in the end.”

John is sure of that. Gothom needs Batman. 

“So got anything on Bane’s whereabouts?”

John is fine with talking about the problem Gothom has right now. It is better than talking about that sort of kiss. 

“Yeah, I’ve got five hundred pages of tunnel records and a flashlight. I could use some help.”

He has been trying to narrow it down but it is difficult. He feels like he could figure it out with a little help or a bit more time. He still has his job to do and he has to have time to visit St. Swithin’s. Sometimes he stays there longer than he means to, usually whenever Miranda is there. He can’t help but want to spend time with her even thought she is very out of his league, much like the man sitting next to him right now. John has always had complicated taste when it came to those he wants. 

“You know what? Drop me in Old Town.”

Bruce sounds so sure and John can’t help but be curious as he starts to drive there. 

“What is in Old Town?”

“The person who stole my car.” 

It is an odd answer. 

“Ok, so after your visit with the car thief, you want to look at tunnel maps with me? I know you may have other plans but it might be helpful to have a fresh set of eyes.” 

That is all he is asking for is Batman’s help with this,it is no like he is trying to ask Bruce to hang out with him for another reason that may or may not have to do with the sort of kiss.

Bruce takes a moment, thinking it over. John is about to say something, pretending like he didn’t mean it when Bruce answers. 

“Sure, I would offer to have you come to the manor but they may be turning off the power soon and Alfred is not around to make tea. I will come to your place after your shift is over.”

John keeps forgetting that Bruce is broke now. 

“Do you even have a way to get to my place?”

“I’ll just take a cab.”

“ Do you even have any cash?”

The sort of sheepish look on his face is enough to give John an answer. John hands him some bills and thinks how strange it is to be lending Bruce Wayne cab fare. He drops Bruce in Old town and goes about finishing his shift. He gets home and hurriedly cleans the apartment. It shouldn’t matter, this isn’t a date. He should probably make sure that they have something resembling dinner at some point. The state of the food in his kitchen is not good. There is hardly any there and what is there is not enough for a full meal or expired. Miranda would give him a lecture about not eating enough if she saw it. He decides to just call out for something. Even if he is buying the man dinner, this is still not a date, no matter how much John may want it to be. John still takes extra time in the shower but he tells himself it is just because he had a long day not because he wants to look nicer for Bruce.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I promised that my next update for this would be quick and I think that it is. Let me know what you think.

*^*^*^*^*  
Barsad knows that soon Gothom’s reckoning will start and his brother and sister will get their revenge and their missing one back. Talia has control of what is needed to bring the city to its knees and soon they will be able to take of the police force here. Barsad has just found out news that will allow them to take care of Wayne. The cat is proving to have quite a survival instinct and quite a healthy fear of Bane and this will help them to lead Wayne into a trap. 

 

Wayne had visited her just today and Barsad made a personal visit to the thief afterwards. He would have much rather been watching John but this could prove useful. It was obvious she was planning on running soon and it was something that Barsad knew could be used to their advantage. 

“What do you want? I thought you were finished needing me.” 

She is trying to sound flippant about his arrival but he can detect just a hint of fear. 

“Perhaps there is one more job and then you can be free. Tell me what did Wayne talk to you about?”

He can see her warring with herself as to how much she should say but the chance to save her own skin loosens her tongue. 

“Says he has a powerful friend that wants to know Bane’s whereabouts and asked if I did any other jobs for Dagget or Bane. I told him I might know where to find Bane and mentioned going to the police officer’s apartment.”

So Wayne may have an inkling that they are aware of John. It is no worry. It may perhaps even cause Wayne to seek Bane out even more now. He speaks to the cat a little longer, finding out all that she told Wayne and then telling her that if she leads Wayne’s powerful friend to them, that the threat of her life would be ended. Before he leaves she asks one question. 

“Why the interest in the cop?” 

Her voice is curious but weary. It is not something she would understand, a thief like her with very little bonds. Instead, he gives a reply that also speaks of a threat. 

“Remember, Miss Kyle, what curiosity did to your namesake.”

He makes his way to Bane certain that Talia will be there tonight as well. He had John’s apt bugged just as Wayne’s house had been and he is certain that they will be listening in tonight. Wayne has been seeking out John and Barsad wonders if perhaps he will tell John the truth. If he does it may make his punishment less severe. 

Barsad remembers the trust he had placed in Wayne in a way, the faith that he cared enough for John to bring him back to them. When he had seen the grave, it had filled him with disappointment, despair, and shock. He had failed Bane and Talia and now John was lost to them. He had thought perhaps the grave was a lie but it appeared that John was no where to be found. Wayne did not have the boy with him and Barsad had taken that as proof that his death had occurred. When the truth was discovered, Barsad did not understand why Wayne had not kept John with him. He thought the man had cared for John, perhaps not as deeply as Talia and Bane but enough to take care of him. Despite not taking care of him, Wayne seems drawn to him now and Barsad knows that soon Wayne will be parted from him.

Barsad knows that things may change once John is back where he belongs. The place he has had with Bane and Talia may change but he is willing to step aside for a while for their little bird to take his place. Bane and Talia have given more to him than most others and he is grateful for it all and will not allow jealousy to linger in his heart for the fact that soon most of their affection may be given to another. John had been theirs first after all and Barsad is certain he will be theirs again, even if he may be resistant or unsure at first. 

Bane has not spoken about the promise he has made Barsad swear to. If it comes down to it, if one must sacrifice with the filth, then Barsad will try to take his brother’s place so that he may be with the ones he holds so dear. 

It had been Bane that had drawn Barsad to the League. He had seen him when he had been part of another man’s army, an army that had forced him into its service despite his reluctance and youth, an army that Bane and the men with him crushed. Bane had spared him, had found him worth more than most would, offered Barsad a chance to be something else. Barsad had pledged himself to Ra’s al Ghul because that is who he had thought Bane was loyal to. It was later that he had heard the rumors, about a pit and a child that escaped, how Bane was taken from there and his mask given. Before Bane had been rescued, it was said that Ra’s found an orphaned child that he took as his own to raise with the child of his blood. It is said that Bane watches the children closely and that some question his intentions. 

Barsad had been with the League for months before he had seen the children that were spoken about. They were not always in the mountains as Ra’s would take them to various places for their education. It had been after one of those trips that Barsad finally saw them.

He had gone to Bane’s chamber at night to speak with him, something that had become a bit of a habit the last week. His brother had seemed lonely the last week but would not speak of it but did seem to enjoy Barsad’s company. As he approaches the door, he sees that it is open and that there are children speaking with Bane. They look young though Barsad knows that to some his own years are few. The girl is a little older and seems to have Ra’s bearing. The boy stands next to her, his hand wrapped in hers. 

“Why do you want us to go?” 

The boy’s words have some anger to them as well as a bit of sadness. 

“We have always slept with you. We just came back today, are you not glad to see us?”

The girl asks and he can see from where he is hidden, Bane softening a bit as he speaks before strengthening himself.

“I am glad to see you both, you know that, but you must sleep in your own rooms now. It is not right for you to lie in my bed with me anymore. It would not be proper.”

The boy does not look happy at the answer but nods a little bit at it. The girl just seems angry and confused by the answer. 

“Why is it not proper or right? Is that what father says? In the pit, we always rested together.”

“This is not the pit, Talia. I will see you in the morning. You need to go back to your own rooms before your father finds you out of bed.” 

Talia looks stricken as Bane turns them away. 

“Come, John Bird. We are not wanted here.” 

The boy follows her as she walks angrily away. Bane looks as if the act of sending them away has caused him pain. It is only when Barsad knows the children will not see that he moves towards Bane’s room. He is surprised when Bane allows him to enter. 

“You know who they are.”

Barsad knows that Bane is asking how much he has heard, how much he knows. 

“They are Ra’s heirs. The girl is Ra’s daughter, comes from the pit, from where you were. The boy was found by Ra’s, made his child.” 

Bane shakes his head at Barsad saying the boy was found by Ra’s. 

“Talia did rise from the pit, yes, and then she found John. This is the first time I have sent them away. It is necessary.” 

That night, Bane tells him of Talia, of John, and Barsad realizes that Bane belongs to them and not Ra’s. When Bane was forced to leave some time later, Barsad stayed to make sure his little ones knew the truth. 

Barsad is forced out of his memories as he has made it to the tunnels. His brother and sister are where he expected, listening to the feeds of John’s apartment. Wayne is with John. Talia is listening intently, Bane beside her. Barsad knows that his information is important and so he tells them. 

“He knows that we have been looking into John. The cat told him but she is willing to trade him for herself. She will lead him here when we need.” 

Bane nods and Talia looks pleased at the news. 

“Everything else is ready but John still does not remember yet. I can not risk telling him yet not till Wayne is taken care of. I had hoped that he would remember by now.” 

Barsad can hear the frustration in her voice.

“It will be taken care of soon, Talia. Wayne will suffer for all he has done to us, for not telling our little bird his past. ”

Bane soothes and Barsad sits with them, listening to the bugs. After a while the conversation changes, there is less talking. There is no mistaking the noises that are being heard. Barsad knows that there will be little mercy for Wayne now unless something changes before the cat brings him to Bane. 

*^*^*^*^*  
Bruce is not sure that he should be here with John but he can’t stay away. He knows that Bane has been looking into John for some reason but Bruce will take care of that soon. He almost doesn’t show up at John’s but the idea of going back to the manor where he would be all alone is not very appealing. 

“She is going to help me but I would like to see what you have as well.” 

Bruce figures it is ok to get right to the point after he enters the apartment. John has just recently showered, his hair still wet. He tells Bruce to take a seat as he shows him where the maps are. 

“I don’t have a whole lot but here it is. Have you eaten yet? I might call in a pizza so would you like some?” 

He hasn’t eaten all day and so he nods his head at John’s question. As John goes to make the call, Bruce looks around the place. It is pretty bare, not many personal touches. From all he has gathered, John is pretty alone. It is not what Bruce had hoped for him when he brought him back here all these years ago. He tries not to think about that instead looking at the maps and everything else John has lain out. 

John has made notes about the tunnels, about Bane. In the margins, he has doodled. It looks like mostly chicken scratch but Bruce can recognize little bits of symbols used in other languages and he is reminded once again that John may not remember his past but it is still there. 

Once the pizza is ordered, John comes and sits next to him. They discuss the maps for a few moments. As they talk, Bruce realizes that the couch is not very big and that they are almost touching. Bruce is not sure if he should scoot away more or move closer to John. Before he can decide, John asks a question. 

“So why a bat? I mean I know now why you had the mask but why dress up as a giant bat?”

John seems a bit nervous sitting on the couch next to him but he decides to ignore why that might be and just answers his question. 

“They scare me. When I was young, I fell into a cave and bats swarmed around me. My dad pulled me up. It was one of the most frightening things in my life.” 

Bruce knows it is dangerous talking about something that he has spoken about with John before. For a moment, John looks like the conversation might be triggering something but then the door bell rings and he goes to get the pizza. When he comes back, it seems that he is fine and Bruce is not sure if he is relieved or disappointed that John is not remembering right now. 

They eat in silence. Once the meal is finished, Bruce starts to talk about how late it is, how he should be going. It is dangerous to spend so much time with John. 

“It is a long trip back to your manor. You could stay here, take the couch or I could take the couch and you could have the bed for the night. I know I made things awkward the other night, with sort of kissing you and everything but I promise to be on my best behavior.” 

John is babbling. It is charming in a way. Bruce knows that he shouldn’t but he leans forwards and catches John’s mouth in a kiss. It is not the slight brush of lips that the last one was. He takes advantage of John’s mouth being slightly parted from his ramblings to let his tongue run along his lip and then his teeth. John responds to it, opens his mouth for it more. It has been a while since Bruce has felt the need to kiss anyone in such a way. He pulls back after a moment, looks at the flush covering John’s face. 

“Was that alright? I don’t want to push you into anything.” 

He wants John even if he knows he shouldn’t have him. He should tell him the truth, warn him about Bane and leave but he feels so lonely and wants to be a little selfish in this moment. He is giving John an out but a part of him hopes John doesn’t take it. 

“I’m fine. You aren’t pushing me into anything. It just has been a while.” 

John puts his hand on Bruce’s shoulder as he says this, the touch shy in a way. Bruce knows he shouldn’t do this but he knows this may be his only chance for this. He kisses him again, puts his hand on the back of John’s neck so that he can pull him closer. He can feel John’s hand grip his shoulder tighter. When they pull away, John lets out a little whine that makes Bruce’s pulse pick up slightly. 

“It has been a while for me as well but I’m clean. Do you have anything?” 

He leans forwards as he asks the question, his hand rubbing circles against John’s skin. 

“I’m clean. No condoms but there is lube in the bedroom.” 

“I guess we will have to end up there soon.”

He brings John’s head closer to him, kisses him again. John’s lips are soft and he seems eager for the kisses. He starts to take Bruce’s shirt off and he lets him. John pulls back to look at his exposed skin and he looks so very young in this moment. Bruce tries not to think about the age difference, about the fact that he knew him as a child. As John’s fingers start to trace some of the scars that litter Bruce’s skin, he reminds himself that John is not a child anymore. 

“Are all of these from your time as Batman?” 

There is a hint of awe in his voice as he asks. 

“Most of them.” 

He takes John’s hand away from his skin, holds it for a moment, feeling the scars there. 

“How did you get these?”

Bruce knows John has had those scars from before Bruce knew him but he had never heard the story behind them. He has no idea if John remembers or not. 

“ Hot oil from a lamp, maybe. I got them in the years that are missing from my memory but I dreamed about it and I think they are from hot oil.” 

Bruce nods, he doesn’t want to ask John too much about his past right now. He helps John take off his own shirt, touches his skin as it is bared before him. He rubs a finger against the mark in the crook of his arm but does not ask about it. That is a scar that he knows how John got. 

“ We should go to the bed before we lose the rest of our cloths.” 

John nods and shows Bruce where it is. There is a small table next to the bed and John opens the drawer in it and pulls out a small bottle of lube that he places on it. Bruce removes his shoes and socks, John had been barefoot being in his own space. John works his zipper open, slides his pants down. He touches Bruce’s member through the fabric of his boxers. It has been a while since a hand other than his own has done so and it responds eagerly. Soon, John pulls the boxers off as well. Bruce grabs his hands, places them so that one is on his own zipper. John takes his pants off quickly, boxers as well. 

John grabs the lube off the table, start to prep himself. Bruce touches himself as he watches, slowly as to not get too excited too soon. John has worked two fingers in and Bruce is not sure if he can watch much longer. 

“ Put some on me.”

It comes out almost as a plea but John doesn’t seem to care. He removes his fingers and pours more lube onto his hand and then places it on Bruce. It is slick and warm and is one of the best things he has felt for a while. 

When everything feels ready, he sits on the bed and has John sit on him as he eases into him. It would be easier to have him on his stomach or his knees but he needs to see his face. John seems to loose himself in this, rocks himself on Bruce, he keeps closing and then opening them as if he can’t decide which he should do. Bruce keeps his eyes open the whole time, wants to see how John looks right now. 

It will be over soon but Bruce slows it down a bit, wants it to last a little longer. He strokes John, works a rhythm that he is sure is enjoyable if the moans coming from his mouth are an indication. John buries his head in Bruce’s shoulder as he comes and he can smell his shampoo. Bruce does not last much longer after that. 

He holds him for a moment before helping him off his lap. John looks pleasantly worn out. He lies down on the bed and Bruce finds the bathroom, gets a wash cloth to clean them. He cleans John first and John seems about to fall asleep. Bruce cleans himself after. He places the sheets on John and starts to make his way back to the living room. 

“You can share the bed. I won’t cuddle unless you want to.” 

John says this sleepily, moving so that Bruce has space to lie down. He gives in to this need to be close to John, lies down, and pulls the sheet over them both. He hesitates just a moment then wraps John in his arms. He hears a mumbled you smell nice before John falls asleep. 

He stays awake for bit, enjoying this. It won’t last. Tomorrow, he will need to find Bane. Once the man is taken care of, then he has to tell John the truth. He thinks about how it may push John away from him but he knows it is needed. That will be later, right now he lets himself fall asleep to the sound of John’s relaxed breathing.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am supper into writing this right now apparently. Please let me know what you think.

*^*^*^*^*  
Bruce wakes the next morning when John’s alarm goes off and his phone does as well. It is surprising it hasn’t been shut off yet but as he checks it, he sees a message from Kyle saying to have his friend meet her at one of the tunnel entrances tonight. John is mumbling next to him about it being too early as he smacks the alarm off. Bruce can’t help but look at him, all rumpled from sleep, it is a sight that he almost thinks he could get used to but he knows he won’t. This can’t last. This isn’t meant for him.

“I would offer you breakfast but I don’t have much in the kitchen beside coffee.” 

John is avoiding looking at him as he gets out of bed and mumbles this as he pulls some boxers on. Bruce grabs his hand, turns him so that he can see his face. 

“Coffee would be great and then I have things I have to look into as I’m sure you do as well.”

John nods his head and then goes to the kitchen. Bruce dresses as John makes the coffee. He finds his shirt in the living room, buttoning up as John comes with a cup of coffee. 

“I just left it black, I have no idea how you take it.”

“Black is fine.” 

He takes the cup from John, trying not to let his fingers brush his too much. This is dangerous, the whole morning after thing, this taste of something normal. He tries to distract himself from his thoughts by taking a sip of coffee. It tastes cheap and bitter and nothing like Alfred’s. The thought of Alfred makes him tense a bit. 

“So I don’t think I have time to drop you off but I do have some cab fare you can borrow. Sorry if this whole thing is a bit awkward, it has been a while since anyone has stayed the night and I mean, Batman is in my living room drinking my crappy coffee.” 

“It’s fine. I will head out in a few moments. I have a lead on Bane. You should stop by sometime after tomorrow, I will have information for you.”

Bruce knows he could tell John now, should tell him now, but he doesn’t want this moment to end. He just sips his too strong coffee as John nods and goes about his routine. He is out of John’s apartment before the man is out of his shower. 

The cab ride to the manor goes by quickly, a call to his lawyer to set up a change in his will, the manor being left to the city and a bag with coordinates left for John. He will take care of Bane but if he doesn’t walk away from the fight , he needs to make sure John can still find out the truth. Alfred is right, he deserves to know. It is raining when he gets there and he is surprised to see Miranda at the door. She is soaked through but still gives him a small smile. 

“I tried to come by last night but no one answered, just like now. Do you have keys?” 

“Never needed them.”

It is the truth and so they walk till they find a way in. The manor seems even lonelier right now. 

“Where did you go last night?” 

“Stayed with a friend.” 

He supposes he can call John a friend, even if he feels like more. He reminds himself that friend may be the best he can hope for. 

“I did not know that Bruce Wayne had friends. Anyone I know?”

Her voice is lightly teasing. This feels comfortable in a way. 

“John Blake, he volunteers at St. Swithin’s.” 

There is a smile upon her face when he says John’s name and her voice is fond when she speaks. 

“ I have spoken with him on occasion. He is a good man.” 

She has made her way to the desk, uncovers it. There are pictures on it and she looks at them. 

“ Don’t worry, I will take care of your parent’s legacy, Bruce. Who is this?” 

She picks up the picture of Rachael. He puts it down, doesn’t answer the question. He can’t think about her right now. 

“Where’s Alfred?”

“He left.”

She turns to him when he says this, looks at him, and then she is leaning forward, lips against his. It is different than with John, feels different, but he gives into just like he had with John. The light shuts off after a moment but that does not slow down what they are doing. He gives into the moment, tries to forgot about everything for just a bit, even if his mind can not let go of John very easily. 

*^*^*^*^*  
She tends the fire as Wayne’s fingers brush against her back. She had kissed him, wanting to touch lips that had touched John’s, had touched what shouldn’t be his. He had given into her easily and she had found that she enjoyed it more than she thought she would. If this man had not cost her so much, she could find herself wanting him. 

“You are pretty good at that.” 

Wayne’s voice is complementary and curious. 

“When I was a child we had almost nothing. But on the nights we had a fire, we felt very rich indeed.”

She remembers the fires that Bane would make in the pit for the two of them. She taught John how to make one, it went better than learning how to light the lamp did. There were nights before Bane’s exile, before her father tried to keep Bane from them, when the three of them would build one together. 

“I assumed your family was wealthy.”

His words bring her out of her thoughts. She tells him that they had not always been so, tells him that the mark on her back is from an old mistake. He says he has had a few as well. Talia knows that he has made more than he knows, many that will cost him soon that will cost this city. She had thought about granting him mercy for John’s sake. John cares for him, Talia can tell from what they have heard and she does not wish her little bird to suffer. He is still so very sweet and she knows Wayne’s fate will hurt him till he knows the truth. She hopes any fondness he may have for Wayne will fade once he is theirs again, once he knows all Wayne has hidden from him. 

His hand finds its way to her neck, feeling the skin there, till his fingers find the chain, trailing down to the locket it is attached to. She had forgotten she was wearing it. She had it tucked into her cloths so he wouldn’t see it, possibly recognize it as a match to John’s from long ago. She wraps her hand around his so that he won’t see it clearly.

“ An old keepsake, a reminder of someone special that is lost to me now.” 

It is the truth, though soon John will be theirs again. 

“ We could run away. Take my plane, go anyway we want.”

The offer is a distraction but she wants to see what he will say.

“Maybe sometime, not tonight.”

She knows there will not be a sometime, Bane will break him tonight, make him suffer. There is a moment when she wonders if he wants to stay because of John but she knows it does not matter. He may care for her little bird but not enough to keep him safe, to make him whole again like they will. She smiles at him, kisses him and knows that soon her revenge will take place. 

*^*^*^*^*  
Bane waits in one of the tunnels, on the bridge, in the area they have chosen for Wayne to be brought to him. He can hear their foot steps; hear the gate slide into place. This is a moment he has been looking forward to for years, a chance to face the man who has kept John from them for so long. 

“ You have made a serious mistake.” 

Bane moves forward, ready to make Wayne pay for all he has done, all the time he has cost them. 

“Not as serious as yours, I fear.” 

Wayne turns towards him, looks him over, eyes lingering on John’s locket which currently hangs around his neck. It seemed fitting to wear to this battle, to remind Wayne of his past with John. 

“Bane.” 

His name comes out as a growl when Wayne says it. 

“Let’s not stand on ceremony here, Mr. Wayne.”

He hears the thief gasp at the name as Wayne brings a fist forward. It is nothing to catch it, land his own blows. 

“Victory has cost you strength. Your peace has made you weak.” 

It is nothing to throw him off the bridge to climb after him. Wayne looks around as Bane climbs down, checking his surroundings, seeing Bane’s men watch. Bane notices that his gaze stays on Barsad a moment longer than the others and then he is throwing little flares. It is one of the first tricks any League member is taught. 

“Theatricality and deception are powerful agents, to the uninitiated but we are initiated , aren’t we, Bruce? League of Shadows, then you betrayed us, took something precious of ours away, and hid him in this squalor.”

He has Wayne in the air, hands around his throat. A part of Bane wants to crush the breath out of him but death is not in the plans for Wayne yet. He must suffer before his life can end. 

“Us? You were excommunicated by a gang of psychopaths. And John does not belong to the League.” 

He throws Wayne to the ground after landing some more blows. Wayne speaks of things he does not understand. 

“Now, I am the League of Shadows, here to succeed where Ra’s failed and I will guide John back to his proper place.” 

There are blows reigned upon him but Bane barely feels them. After the agony of being ripped apart in the pit, there is very little physical pain that can compare. Wayne charges at him, rips the locket from his neck. It is an insult in a way, one Bane will not allow. 

“That is not yours to take; Mr. Wayne, even if you were once entrusted with it. I will give it back to its owner when the time is right, when you are no longer around to lie to him, to keep him unaware of who he is.” 

 

He goes to finish Wayne when the man ducks from him, uses a device to rid the place of lights. It would work well against one who is more use to light than dark. The dark of the pit had been his constant companion for a large part of his life. He tells Wayne such as he listens for the man, as he makes out his breathing and shape in the dark. He soon has him caught off guard and in his grasp. 

“The shadows betray you because they belong to me.”

He throws Wayne against the ground, pounds at his mask till it is broken. Wayne is on the ground, worn and Bane knows there is not much fight left in him. He is a shadow of himself, all the fire once in him little more than embers at this point. It just confirms that the man is not strong enough to be worthy of their bird, worthy of the affection that John gave him last night. He thinks about how Wayne has touched John, how he has touched Talia and he lets his anger take over for a moment and brings his boot down on the man’s wrist so that he is forced to let go of the locket. Only the chain is broken and that can be replaced. He tosses it to Barsad who gives him a detonator. 

“Now, I will show you where I have made my home as I prepared to bring justice and then I will break you.” 

The charges go off quickly and soon Wayne’s armory is shown. He thanks Wayne for it as the man gets up, too stubborn to know when he is beaten. 

“I wondered which would break first your spirit or your body.” 

Wayne’s punch does not connect and it is nothing for Bane to pull him forward and then down upon his knees. The crack of Wayne’s bones is one of the most beautiful sounds he has heard and his only regret is that Talia is not here to listen to it. He leaves the traitor broken on the floor, mask shattered beyond repair as he goes to finish preparations to take Wayne from here. The man will never again keep their little one from them now.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really love writing this story. I may try to focus on a few other stories soon but here is a decent length update. I will get into more stuff that is not just the movie soon. Please let me know what you think.

*^*^*^*^*  
Talia knows that there is no need for her to be here before they leave to take Wayne to the rest of his punishment that it is a risk but she wants to see Bane. She walks quickly, looking for him. She wears a different mask in a way right now in her plain cloths, hood drawn up; most would not see her as Miranda Tate right now. 

She sees the small plane that they are preparing, a cargo plane, one that is not associated with her mask. Barsad is instructing men to move a figure into it. It is Wayne. Barsad sees her, makes a gesture that he will meet her a little ways away. It will do no good for Wayne to possibly see her. Escape would almost be impossible from the fate they have chosen for him but Talia will not take a chance. 

“It is good to see you, sister, but there was no reason for you to come. Wayne is broken. I will assure that he survives the journey but there will be no relief given for his pain.”

Talia smiles at Barsad’s words. He feels just as wronged by Wayne as they do. Talia thinks that maybe in a way he might feel even more wronged as he had known Wayne, had considered the man almost an ally at one point. 

“Bane?”

The way she says his name is both asking where he is and if Wayne managed to do any harm. She knows that her protector is strong but even the strong can be damaged. The mask he must wear is proof that even Bane can be made to bleed. Barsad understands both of her questions.

“I shall take you to him. Wayne did not do any damage to his person, though he did try to take something from him. Our brother took it back. Wayne’s wrist is much more damaged than this.” 

Barsad pulls John’s locket from his pocket. Talia can see where the chain has been broken. It will be easy to fix or replace. They make their way to Bane and soon Talia can see him. He turns to her and speaks softly as she places her hand on his shoulder.

“Everything is ready for Wayne to be delivered to the pit unless you want something else to be done.” 

She knows that Bane still believes that Wayne deserves the pit but he is giving her a chance to have him killed or to grant mercy if she deems it needed. She thinks about how the man could have been more than he is, how he has kept her bird in the dark and she knows that the pit is what he deserves.

“No, the pit will do. I will call a meeting once you return so that we can start the reckoning. We can take care of the police but I want our bird safe.”

“Gordon has been having him investigate for him, it should not be difficult to prevent him from being in the tunnels. I will make sure that he does not suffer the fate of the others.” 

Barsad’s words are a comfort. She gives him a short kiss to show how she appreciates his devotion to them. 

She thinks about how Bane had been wearing John’s locket and she comes to a decision. She removes her own, places it on his neck. In a few days, she will be in a position where some may try to take anything that seems to be of value and she must keep up her mask and preventing someone form taking it with her methods could shatter her mask. 

“You will keep it safe. I wait for your return.”

She embraces Bane briefly and then makes her way to where she has been staying. She needs to be in place to assure that this place can start its fall. 

*^*^*^*^*  
Bruce remembers fading in and out as they took him from Gothom. So many of his bones are broken and he has no idea why Bane has not killed him yet. He knows that they have taken him far away from Gothom. He remembers a little bit of the plane ride, all the pain from the turbulence jarring his broken body, glimpses of Barsad. They may have spoken, Bruce gasping out accusations of Barsad working with Bane the whole time, Barsad giving no denial, telling Bruce he should not have given John to the city. If the conversation happened, it is fuzzy in his head with all the pain coursing through his body. 

He is startled awake by some noise and he realizes that he is in some sort of cell. Bane stands near him, looking up towards the large hole, towards the light. A little bit of light catches the locket he wears, one that is similar to John’s but he knows it is not. He had ripped it off of Bane and then the man took it back. His wrist still aches from the force of Bane’s boot though it is a dull ache compared to that of his back. He wants to know why he isn’t dead but the first words out of his mouth are about John.

“He doesn’t remember anything about the League.”

“I am already aware of that, Mr. Wayne. Ra’s had been working on making him forget certain aspects of his life and perhaps what ever happened to him before you took him caused his memories be buried. They can be unearthed. You had a chance to help him recover them perhaps, a chance to tell him of what you know but you did not take it. That was very cruel of you and now you shall suffer for it.”

Bane sounds pleased at the idea of Bruce suffering. He thought when Selina first mentioned Bane having her steal John’s hair that Bane was simply interested in John because of his connection to Ra’s but now he thinks it is more than that. He must have known John before his excommunication, Barsad being among his men and the locket that matches John’s just confirms that thought. 

“You were the one Ra’s thought would take John.”

Bane does not turn towards him, just continues staring at the small ray of light.

“He would have left the League and come with me quite willingly. He was never Ra’s though the man wanted him to be.”

There is something important here, Bruce is sure of it, and he ignores his pain and focuses on getting as much information as he can. 

“Ra’s found him, took him out of Gotham.”

Bruce is certain even with all of the lies he was told, that this is the truth. 

“Ra’s was not the one to first notice his fire but that does not matter now. What matters is that you hid him in a life he had chosen to walk away from, took his affection and denied him his past but now I have separated you from him.” 

“ He wanted to return to Gothom.”

It is not the whole truth but Bane doesn’t deserve to know that John only wanted to return to Gothom if he couldn’t find those he was looking for. Bruce thinks that Bane may have been who John had been speaking about and the thought chills him a bit. 

Bane turns towards him now and there is a flash of anger in his eyes that leaves quickly. Bruce got under his skin for just a moment. Bane would kill him, Bruce is certain of it, and that raises a question.

“Why am I still alive?” 

“You do not fear death. Your punishment must be more severe.”

Bruce knows what that means, has been preparing himself for it as soon as he woke.

“Torture.” 

“Yes. Not of the body but of the soul.”

Pain is racing through his body and Bruce is not sure what more Bane could do to him. 

“Where am I ?” 

It is a simple question but one he needs to know the answer, needs to know how far from Gotham he is, how far from John. 

“Home. Where I first learned of despair and where you will learn of it as well.” 

The pit, there is no other place that Bane could be speaking of. He listens as Bane speaks about hope poisoning, how he plans to destroy Gotham, about how Bruce will be able to do nothing but watch. 

“And when it is done, when Gotham is ashes, then you have my permission to die.”

Bane presses down on him as he exits the cell. He wants to get up but he can’t, his body is too broken. All he can do is wait to see what happens to Gotham.  
*^*^*^*^*  
John had been nervous and excited when he had gone to Wayne manor after the night with Bruce. He wasn’t sure how he was suppose to act around him after sleeping with him but Bruce had said to come by and John wasn’t going to not listen to Batman. Besides, he wanted to tell him about being promoted to Detective. There were very few people John felt important enough to tell the news to besides the kids and Father Riley. Off the top of his head, the only ones he would want to tell are Bruce and Miranda. John knows that Miranda is busy with Wayne board stuff so Bruce would get to hear the news first, only he was not there. 

The empty manor had made a sick feeling settle in his gut. Bruce had went to face Bane and the little bit John had heard about the man made him sound formidable. Batman is dangerous but it has been a long time since he has been in the suit on a regular basis and even Batman can be hurt. He goes looking for the thief and he found her trying to escape Gotham. She seemed calm and collected but John can see fear beneath it all. She admits that she is not sure if Wayne is dead but she knows Bane has taken him out of commission. 

“Is that all you wanted to know, Officer?”

Her voice holds a little disdain, like she is trying to cover up the fact that she had shown fear earlier. 

“Detective John Blake and unless you have something else you need to tell me, I will be on my way Miss Kyle.” 

When he says his name, something passes through her eyes like she is debating something with her self. He turns to go, leaving her alone in the room for a few moments before having others to take her to Blackgate when her voice stops him.

“I had a job that was for Bane. It was taking a hair from your apartment. Took a locket too but that was taken from me by one of his men. He has an interest in you, if I was you, I would leave this place.”

Now he knows where his locket disappeared to. Why would Bane of all people want his hair? 

“Why tell me this?”

She shrugs and he knows that he is not going to get anymore from her. 

He is telling Gordon about Batman’s disappearance when Foley walked in with news of Bane kidnapping the Wayne board. John’s first thought is Miranda and how he doesn’t want another person he cares about to be hurt by this mercenary. The tunnels are being searched and John figures out what is happening but a moment too late. He goes to Gordon, helps the man leave the hospital, the whole time worrying about Miranda. Bane is a monster, he has no doubts about that now, and he is unsure if he let Miranda go or not. 

He watches Bane at Blackgate with Gordon. John had barely seen him at the stock exchange but now he can see him fully, see the mask, something silvery that hangs off his neck. John gets a strange feeling when the flash of shine from the chain Bane wears catches his eyes but once his words start, John is much more focused on Gordon’s speech. He knows it is the truth from Gordon’s reaction. 

Harvey Dent being killed by Batman was a lie. It made John angry to know that they tainted Batman’s reputation for a murderer, tried to make a symbol out of someone who fell. A lie that is crumbled now and John knows it will just add to the chaos around Gotham. He lashes out at Gordon but he still wants to help Gotham and Gordon is one of the few people that can. 

They try to make a resistance but most of the cops are trapped in the tunnels. There are a few still up above and they work together the best they can, avoiding Bane’s men and the criminals that were released. John wonders about Bruce, about Miranda, if they are all right, checks on the kids as much as he cans and wonders why Bane wanted his hair. He still dreams at night, about the girl and the other with her, the man with his face always hidden to John. He is their protector and when he speaks in John’s dreams, his voice almost mechanical sounding. Something about that worries John and he tries not to dwell on it, he has much more pressing things to worry about.

He makes his way to the Wayne building. It hasn’t been checked out yet and John thinks it may have a good vantage point. When he enters, he is sure that people are there. He makes his way through the halls, quietly, as to try not to draw attention. He enters a room and sees a few people huddled away from the doorway. It looks like the board has stayed here. He makes his way over and one notices him.

“And who are you, son?” 

The man who asks this doesn’t seem scared or weary. John thinks he looks familiar, maybe it is Fox. Before John can say there is another voice that answers. 

“Officer John Blake.” 

John turns towards the voice and it is with relief that he sees Miranda standing there. She doesn’t look like she has been hurt. 

“Detective now, actually, got promoted a couple days before all of this. Have you been here the whole time?” 

She smiles a little at him, not a very bright one but it is still a beautiful sight. 

“Congratulations. We have been. It was said the police were trapped. ” 

John can hear a bit of a question in her words. Fox is watching him as well, waiting for his answer.

“Not all. Can’t tell you too much but there is some of us who are going to do what we can to stop this before they get bored and pull the trigger.” 

John knows that the trigger will eventually be pulled. This isn’t a revolution, no matter what they may say. At the mention of trigger, Miranda and Fox exchange a look. 

“ John, we can show you a spot where you may be able to see most of the city. Come this way.”

Miranda takes his hand and John enjoys the feel of it for a moment. They walk with Fox till they are away from the others.

“There is something that most people don’t know but if you are in contact with anyone coming up with a plan, it may be good for you to be aware of something.” 

Fox’s voice is steady even if there is little bit of worry in it. Whatever they want him to relay to the others can not be good. 

“The bomb is not stable. It is not meant to be one, it is meant to be a reactor. They are aware and are counting on it blowing.”

John knows that this is bad news.

“Do you know how long?”

“About five months form when they first got.”

Miranda’s hand is still in his and he tightens his hold slightly. She lets him, rubs her thumb along his. 

“I will let the others know when I see them next. We know that they have it in a truck, is there anything that would help us to track it?” 

Fox nods at him, says to give him a little time and he may be able to scrounge something up. He leaves them alone after a moment. Miranda leads him to a window and she is right that he can see most of the city from here. 

“I am glad to see you, John, even if this is not the best situation.” 

He is glad to see her as well. She moves closer to him, takes her hand out of his and wraps his arm around herself. They stay like this for a few moments, looking out over the city, at the chaos that engulfs the city now. John feels so very angry at all of this, so helpless. There is only so much he can do but he will do all that he can. It is harder now, knowing that they are on limited time. 

“Are you heading back out before dark? You could stay here, we have room and it would be safer.” 

It would be safer but Gordon expects him back tonight and now John has news the man needs to know. 

“I have to go back today.”

She turns to him after he says this, his arm sill around her shoulder. They are so close together, probably closer than they should be, but John doesn’t move away. 

“I can go with you. You should not be out there alone.” 

“I will be fine. Stay here. I will come back when I can, when I know something.”

He needs her to stay here, where she is somewhat safe. There are so few people he really feels connected to and one of them is suffering a fate John can only guess at. 

“Be safe.”

She tells him this and then she is placing a kiss upon his cheek. Her lips are warm. She pulls back for just a moment and then places another kiss, this one on his lips. He feels frozen by the brief contact, like he should move away but at the same time it feels so comforting, almost like it is something they have done before. Before he can think about it more, she pulls away from him and he hears the sound of someone else coming to them.

Fox is here again and John wonders if he saw the kiss. If he did, he says nothing about it. Instead, he hands John a device that should be able to trace the radiation. John thanks him and then is on his way. As he makes his way outside, he looks up and can see Miranda in the window looking out. She is there for just a moment and then she is back inside. John tries not to think about how her lips felt as he makes his way back to Gordon for the night. 

*^*^*^*^*


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this story is turning out long but I enjoy writing it.Please let me know what you think.

*^*^*^*^*  
Gotham is falling into ruins just as they had planned. Bane has helped to fell many corrupted places in his time but this one is different in a way. Their plans for Gotham had been more long term than many and were just as much about revenge in a way as just cleansing the earth of this filth. Some of the League left from Ra’s time believed it to be fulfilling his last failed mission and as a way to avenge the man. Bane supposes it is in a way but the vengeance is really about their little bird, about the fact that this city took him from them, that Wayne had taken him from them.

So much time lost, time they can never regain. Their little bird has grown and changed away from them though Talia assures him that much of the boy they knew is still there. Bane has yet to even be able to see John in person. He knows that it was needed for him to stay away from him but now that the occupation is in full swing, John can be captured if it is needed but that will come later. 

He spends his time being the figurehead for their so called revolution. He monitors the courts, makes sure no outside influences come, and waits for word from Talia. She is in contact with John and through him most of the resistance. John is fighting against them and it feels so very wrong. Bane tells himself that it will not last for long, that their John will understand in time. It is still difficult to know that he wants this corrupted place to survive right now. 

There is still some time left for this city and Bane has been counting the days. He wonders how much Wayne has been able to stomach to watch, how much pain he is feeling. The idea of Wayne’s suffering is pleasant to him. There are very few people in this world that Bane has felt strong emotion about, positive or negative, but Wayne is one that Bane can admit he hates just as much as he hated Ra’s for what each of them did. Their actions took John from where he should have been, made Talia feel as if she had failed someone she holds dear. Neither man can hurt his innocents anymore. 

Bane does not want to spend his time thinking of those who have wronged all three of them so, instead he thinks about the date coming up, what it means. Birthdays have always been a tradition that Bane has found fascinating. It was not something he was aware of being much of a ritual till Talia and her mother. There was not much that could be done for celebration in the pit but once a year had seemed to pass, Talia’s mother would give a small gift to her daughter, often times a toy made out of scraps or a bit more food. After she deemed Bane to be safe, she would spend time talking to him and she explained why it was celebrated, why gifts were given. She had asked him when his birthday was and he told her that he could not remember. He had been placed in the pit so young and time was hard to keep track of there that he had no idea just how many years had passed. She started giving him a small token on the same day she gave Talia one. When Talia’s mother died, Bane kept up the tradition with Talia but felt no need to give anything to his self. The small smile Talia would get at him remembering was gift enough. 

Things changed slightly after leaving the pit. He would still give Talia a gift every time summer first came, on a date that her father decided must be the day she had been born but he also had another that it seemed important to give a gift to as well. John’s birthday was when fall started to turn into winter but he knew what date it was and that made it easier to keep track of. Bane remembers when John asked him about his own. At his explanation that he was not even sure what season he had been born and so had never really celebrated a birthday, John looked sad. Talia had told Bane that he deserved to have a day and so he needed to pick a date. Every year, his little ones would give him gifts and more attention on the date he had chosen, the day that he had been reunited with Talia, the day he met John. Bane had felt that it was fitting in a way. He had always been touched that they felt he deserved a celebration but he much preferred celebrating theirs. 

Their birthdays had always been simple affairs. Ra’s did not see much point in anything elaborate but there had always been small gifts given and a special meal ate. Bane had not always been able to spend time with them on those days, Ra’s not wanting him there but he always made sure to give them something for it. Talia’s for this year had already passed but John’s was soon and Bane intends to indulge in a tradition he has not been able to in sometime, even if a gift from him may not be welcome. 

He makes his way from the court to where they have been staying. His room houses both Barsad and his self, there is little in it besides their bedding and a few personal effects. There has never been much need to have many belongings but there are a few things that Bane has felt the need to keep. He had kept very little in the pit, the ring Talia’s mother wore that he had given to Talia once he was freed, his teddy bear that had come into the pit with him, and Talia’s first knife were the only things that he felt were important enough to keep safe. He had made sure when she escaped the pit that she had one that was stronger, one that he had given to her as one of her birthday gifts. Most of the gifts he had given his little ones had been practical things or things that they would find dear. He had a few more belongings in the League but most were left behind in his exile, just a few things taken. There is one in particular he is looking for now. 

He can hear Barsad’s soft foot steps as he looks for what he seeks. His brother had been running an errand for Talia, securing something that was not necessary but Talia had asked for. It was a little easier for them to get supplies and what she had asked for is something they would not miss and Bane is certain it was wanted for John, to give him something on his day. Bane knows that she will have an easier time giving it to him than he will, that the gesture will not seem strange coming from her mask. He finds what he is looking for and takes it to the bedding to inspect, make sure it is still in good condition. Barsad joins him on the bedding, looks over his shoulder as he takes stock of what lays in his hands. 

“Our sister was pleased that I could sneak the package to her. I do not think anyone will question her about how she got it, she is resourceful and even those who only see her mask know this.”

Bane nods at Barsad’s words and continues his examination. It is in good condition despite the fact it has not been looked at for a while though it needs sharpened. Bane had been uncertain why he had kept it all these years but now he is glad of it. The knife is a simple one, can be folded up and carried easily but it is sturdy. He had gotten it before his exile, meant it as a gift for John’s birthday, carried it with him when he left and had hoped to give it to him when they were reunited. That had not happened and Bane remembers looking at it days after the news of John’s supposed death, thinking of tossing it, but keeping it instead, and now having brought it with him to Gotham. It seems fitting to have it given to John now. 

“It is dull but it has held up well. I need the wet stone.”

Barsad fetches it for him and sits in companionable silence as Bane goes about his task. He thinks of some of the gifts he had gotten John before, the book of Winne the Pooh he had gotten him after John told him of the origins of his name. He remembers John reading it to Talia and him, how John said his mom used to do voices or at least that is what he remembered, how Talia had laughed at the idea of a bear being friends with a pig. 

“A bear would eat a pig, not talk to it. Though one that small, he might need to eat the donkey as well.” 

“Pooh only likes to eat honey, that is why he gets stuck all the time, besides I wouldn’t read it if Pooh ate Piglet, it would be too sad.”

Bane had enjoyed their talk about it, wished he still had John’s copy of the book. Bane is certain Ra’s had taken most of what he had given him in his quest to erasure Bane from one of his heir’s life. The knife is soon sharp enough to prove useful if John needs it to. Bane knows that he can not give it to their little bird in person, not yet, but it can still be given to him.

“Would you like me to give that to Talia to give to him?” 

“No. I think it is best if he knows it is from me, it may help trigger something. We have talked about seeing what training remains and this may be a good time to find out. I want you to give it to him.”

“I will do so gladly, brother.” 

They talk for a few moments more, going over plans before they lay down for their rest. Bane knows that Barsad will make certain to give his gift to John.

*^*^*^*^*  
Barsad knows that John does not stay put in one spot. Talia had spoken of how he searches the streets and he is certain that he will be able to find him to give Bane’s gift. It is a sentimental thing but Barsad will not condemn his brother or sister for the softness that comes from their need to care for their little bird. 

He finds him near one of the sewer grates. It is too small for anyone to come out of but it has enough of an opening for notes to be slipped into it and that is what John is doing right now. He is trying to keep in contact with the other police. Barsad can admire John’s determination even if it is not for a worthy cause. He does not let himself be seen, waits for John to leave. He follows him, keeping out of sight but it is obvious that John has gotten a sense that someone is following him. When Barsad goes to attack, John counters quickly, moving in a way that is not born from police training. It looks as if some of his skills he learned from the League are still there, even if they are rusty from not being used. Barsad manages to back him against the wall, pins him there.

“Hello, little one. I bring a gift.” 

He does not say these words in English, wanting to know how much of his lessons are still there hidden from him. Barsad is pleased when John replies, his answer in English but knowing what was said. 

“A gift from who? I don’t want anything from any of you.” 

“Bane wants you to have this. It will not harm you to take it, I assure you. If you desire the truths that have been kept from you, that you were forced to forget, all you have do is seek him out.” 

John stills at his words and Barsad lets him go, takes the knife from his pocket and places it in John’s hands. John is tense but he stands there, ready to attack if needed. Barsad starts to leave and John tries to stop him. It is not too difficult to knock him off balance, to go to the street. John does not follow, goes the opposite direction. Barsad is certain he will make his way to Talia. What he has seen from John shows that his past is starting to surface and he knows that it will please his brother and sister.

*^*^*^*^*  
Talia holds the coffee in her hands. It is fresh and warm and has sugar in it, a rare thing at this time. It is a simple treat but one she is sure John will enjoy. Barsad had teased a bit at her asking for it but made sure to get it to her in time for today. 

John had gone straight up to the vantage point and Talia knows that something is bothering him. He did not say anything to her which is a strange occurrence. Since finding her, he has tried to visit as much as he can, occasionally staying the night. She has been touching him more, giving him little kisses here and there, building up to what she wants. He seems hesitant with her at time, perhaps feeling like they are betraying Wayne but she knows that he will give into his need soon. 

She sees him at the window, looking at an object in his hand. When she is close enough, she sees that it is the knife Bane had intended to give him so long ago. She now knows why he had seemed out of sorts today. He tucks it into his pocket before she can ask about it. 

“Is that coffee? How did you get?”

He gladly takes the cup out of her hand. His eyes close as he takes the first sip, enjoying it. She sits beside him, closer than what is needed. 

“Yes it is. I have my ways and it is not much of a birthday gift but I felt you might enjoy it.” 

He looks at her when she says this, a little bit of confusion on his face. 

“How did you know that is today?” 

“You told me once a while ago. You must have forgotten that you said anything.” 

John nods at that and tells her thanks. It is the truth and Talia has been telling John more of it lately, hinting at their connection to hopefully help draw his memories to the surface. She can not outright tell him as she needs to keep her mask for now. He had spoken to her about the years he had forgotten and she has been encouraging him to try to think about them. 

“Is everything alright, John? You seem troubled.” 

He looks at her when she asks this and he grabs her hand as he starts to speak. She runs her thumb over the scars. 

“ I had an encounter with one of Bane’s men today. He gave me a present from Bane and I am worried about what it means. I think he may been involved with those years I can’t remember. ” 

He pulls out the knife when he says this. She can hear anger and a bit of fear in his voice when he says Bane’s name and it upsets her knowing her father got his wish in a way. Ra’s caused their seprtation, tried to get their bird to forget them and he had. He should not fear their protector and the fact that he does makes her wish that her father and Wayne could suffer more than they already have. 

“I should toss it.” 

She stops him from rising, looks at the knife. 

“You should keep it. Any form of protection is hard to come by and I know you are not carrying your gun anymore. You should stay here tonight, it could be dangerous for you to go out there if you have already been stopped today.” 

It takes a little more prodding to get him to lie with her in her bedding. They do not speak of the knife the rest of the night. Talia lies next to her little bird, sharing a blanket. It feels much like it used to and when she gives him a good night kiss, he lets her deepen it a bit. She enjoys how he tastes, so familiar yet different at the same time with a bit of coffee taste in his mouth. He lets her touch him, lets her stick her hand rub between his legs. When her hand starts to undo his zipper, he stills her hand, tells her they shouldn’t do this. 

“I want to, John. It will cause no harm, I need this, want to feel something reassuring.” 

He gives into her, lets her hand go back to rubbing him. She encourages him to touch as well, his hand nervous in its exploration of her breast but soon he loses himself in what she is making him feel. It is quick, both just using their hands but Talia still enjoys his touch, enjoyed how his fingers felt inside of her. They will be able to do more soon, explore each other’s bodies in greater detail later but for now she is content to lie in his arms. 

*^*^*^*^*


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy. I noticed that with a lot of my fics I write a lot of people sleeping. I apparently just want my characters to get lots of rest.

*^*^*^*^*  
Every moment that he is in this pit feels like a lifetime for Bruce, a lifetime away from the city he tried so hard to save, a city that is now in a monster’s hands. He had watched Bane’s grand speech, his false revolution, and it made anger rise up in him. He needs that anger desperately now, needs it burning to fight his doubts, his fears. 

He listens as they speak of Ra’s wife, of the child that was born in this pit, of how Bane would not want this spoken of. The idea of Bane being Ra’s child is terrifying in a way but it makes sense why the League would allow him to take over after he was excommunicated, why Bane would feel the need to finish Ra’s last mission. When his back is set, when he is hanging by that rope, he imagines Ra’s taunting him. The man speaks of the League being continued by Bane, of Gotham’s destruction, of John being back with them, felling Gotham as he should have before Bruce hid him. Even knowing that the vision was caused by pain, it still haunts him. 

John is a constant in his thoughts. He wonders if John remembers yet, if he is angry at Bruce now for not speaking of their connection. He wonders what Bane wants with him. He remembers the possessive tone in Bane’s voice when he said John’s name, the flash of anger when Bruce spoke of John wanting to return to Gotham. Bruce wonders if some of this vendetta Bane has against him is because of John. He needs to get back to Gotham before it is destroyed.

There is only one way out of this pit and that is to climb. It looks impossible but Bruce knows that it has been done once before and he can do it now. He is still healing, his body weak, but he knows he can not waste time. The rope is heavy around his waist but to try the climb without it would be foolish. He can hear the men speaking, knows that they are all watching but he can not focus on them right now. The stones are hard to hold onto. He can not keep his grip and he falls. He is not terribly injured in his tumble but he knows it will be a few days before he can try again. A terrible thought occurs to him that he may never see Gotham or John again and that hurts worse than the damage the fall did to his body. 

*^*^*^*^*  
John decides to tell no one except Miranda about where the knife comes from. He knows that receiving a birthday present from Bane of all people will look crazy and not good. He is worried about what the others may think if they knew he has a connection to Bane. It has only been about four days since he was given it but it feels longer. The days feel both long and short due to John knowing that they are limited now. The knife is taken with him and it always feels heavier in his pocket than it should. 

He has barely been sleeping, worried about what his dreams may show him. John goes about his routine but he has not stayed with Miranda since the night of his birthday and has kept his visits with her brief. Their friendship seems to be becoming more and John is not sure that it should. He feels guilt when he touches her even though he has made no promises to anyone. Sleeping with Bruce before all of this had been great but John has no idea where the man is or even if he is alive and from some of what Miranda has said, she has slept with him too. The whole thing makes him feel like a bundle of guilt and strange feelings. Even the guilt he feels doesn’t seem to be enough; being with her seems strangely comforting. And comfort is something he needs desperately right now. 

There has been a bit of calm lately. John walks the streets now and they seem quiet in a way that Gotham never has. There is still looting and the courts but it has all just become a routine now. There is very little word from the world outside and John wonders how much people are still talking about Gotham, if they have just forgotten it or have already decided that it is dead. Gotham has always had its share of problems and John can understand in a way why it would be targeted but he is not sure if full out destruction is the right way. There has to be a better way than blowing everybody up. 

He is making his way to the Wayne building as quickly as he can but he is trying to vary his route now. He had been found once and he doesn’t want it to happen again. John thinks he may be able to hold his own in a fight against some of them and that is strange in a way. He doesn’t remember having any sort of training like what Bane’s men have had but when he was approached by Bane’s second, he had been able to evade him, block him. Even with some possible hidden skills he is unaware of, it would still be possible for him to be taken, to be used for information. Gordon trusts him and he knows a lot of what the resistance is doing and he can’t risk any of it being known. He still makes his usual stops, the Wayne building, St. Swithins but he is careful to see if he is followed. 

This is the last stop of the day and he does not see Miranda when he first enters. He speaks with Fox, telling the man about how marking the trucks is going. John feels like they should be doing more, working on getting the officers out but most of the men are so focused on the trucks, his words are doing no good. After finishing with Fox, he makes his way to the room that he knows Miranda uses. He feels so very exhausted when he sees her and he knows he must look it if the expression of her face is anything to go by. 

“John, have you slept much the last few days?”

Her voice has a hint of concern in it as she approaches him. He is not used to people worrying about him like she does. She still seems so composed, so regal in a way even with all the chaos that has been going on, beautiful in a way few are. 

“Not really.”

It is a simple answer and she frowns at him. She takes his hand and leads him towards her bedding. 

“You will stay here tonight. I can find extra bedding if you do not want me to lay with you, but you need sleep, John, and this is the only way I can make sure that you rest.” 

Her voice holds no room for argument. Miranda can be a force to reckon with and there are times John is very glad that he is on her good side. 

“I will stay and you don’t need to get more bedding.” 

There is a little tiny bit of heat in his cheeks as he says this. Miranda smiles at him as she sits down next to him, holds his hand. It always feel right in a way when they touch and John isn’t sure why. 

“You know, John, there is nothing wrong with what we have done. No one will blame us for getting comfort where we can and I care for you.” 

He nods at her words, tells her that he cares for her as well. There is a knock and Miranda gets up. He can hear her speak quietly to Fox as he asks if John is staying and that there is a little extra food if it is needed, John feels the need to say that he doesn’t need any of their food but he can hear Miranda tell him that it would be appreciated and she follows Fox out. She is back quickly with two plates and some water. 

“You didn’t have to get me any.” 

He still takes a plate as she sits down. It is not much, looks like someone tried to make a sort of stew with canned beans and veggies and some sort of jerky. John has had worse during the occupation. 

“ It is hard to store it so you may as well eat it. I am sure you could use a little extra nourishment.” 

There is almost a bit of teasing in her voice. They eat and as they do so, Miranda asks him about his day, about how the kids are doing. He tells her what he can and soon their plates are cleaned. She takes the plates away and while she is gone, John pulls out the knife and looks at it, as if it can tell him why it was given to him, who Bane may have been to him once. There is something familiar about Bane that has been nagging at him, something he doesn’t want to see as a possibility. 

“Have you told anyone else about that?” 

Miranda is back and her voice is soft and the question is curious. He puts the knife in the pocket of his outer jacket, taking it off to get ready for sleep. They lay down together, huddled under the blankets. It is still cold but they are warmer lying like this. 

“No, I haven’t. Not sure I should.”

“It is your choice about who should know. Just know that you can’t always run from your past, John.” 

She knows that he doesn’t want to talk about this and he appreciates that she will not make him. She lies with her head on his shoulder, his hand in her hair. It is very soft. She hums something and her breath is warm against his skin. It sounds like a lullaby and there is something soothing about it.

“That is pretty.” 

His words come out with a yawn. He knows that she smiles at the sound before she speaks. 

“My mother taught it to me. The one who took care of me after she died used to sing it to me when I was missing her.” 

There is fondness in her voice but also a bit of sadness that makes him tighten his arm around her just a tiny bit. Miranda does not talk about her past much and each time that she does John feels honored that she is sharing it with him. He knows that she lost her parents that she is like him, like Bruce. It might be why he is so drawn to her, why he is also so drawn to Bruce. He hopes Bruce is alright, that he is making his way back to Gotham from where ever Bane placed him. Miranda kisses his cheek briefly and then resumes her lullaby and it soothes him into his sleep. 

The dreams come as they always do, fuzzy but clear in a way as well. There are always so many feelings that come with the dreams, the feeling of safety, of wholeness that he never quite feels when he is awake. He dreams about the girl always, her smile, her eyes that seem to burn with a fire, about the figure that watches over them both, their protector. 

John dreams about being sick, nothing too bad, just enough of a fever to make him have to stay in bed. He would rather be training but it is too cold for him to be outside in his condition. He is given medicine and soup and the girl stays with him despite her father saying that she may catch it as well. That night, they make their way to their protector’s room as they always do. He lets them in but fusses over them both. 

“You can make him feel better. You used to help me all the time.” 

The girl’s voice is almost bossy but the man does not seem to mind. He lays with them both in bed, an extra blanket wrapped tightly around John to keep him warm. He sings softly. It sounds a little strange coming from his mask but it is still soothing and reminds John of when his mom would sing to him, when he would hold his stuffed Pooh bear tight when he was sick. His Pooh bear had been left behind when he left Gotham and this is the first time he really misses it and he says as much. Their protector gets up at this and goes to the small trunk that he has. She gets up as well and John can see that she is excited by what ever it is he pulls from the trunk. 

“You did not leave him behind. He will help.” 

Her voice sounds sure about it as she climbs back into the bed. John is once again surrounded by them both and a bear placed into his arms. It is not his Pooh, this bear is much older and has been patched together, but it feels nice to have something in his arms again. 

“His name is Osito, he came to the pit with me and he left with me as well. He will help your sleep.” 

“Thank you, Bane.” 

John’s voice in this memory is full of gratitude and his younger self drifts off to sleep as John feels himself start to wake. He comes out of his sleep and there is dread in his stomach as he realizes just why Bane had seemed familiar when he saw him on the news. He holds Miranda a little tighter, tells himself that this doesn’t matter as he tries to go back to sleep. However Bane may have taken care of him in the past, he is still trying to blow up this city. John stays awake a bit longer wondering where the girl is if Bane is here, if she has any part in this and why if they both cared for him as much as it feels like they did, why they left him, why he ended up back in Gotham all alone. These are questions that John can’t figure out the answers to before he falls back into an uneasy sleep.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here is another chapter. This story is going to be fairly long so thank you for sticking with it.

*^*^*^*^*  
He tries not to dwell on the fact that apparently he grew up around Bane. He won’t seek him out even if he is curious about his past, wants to know where the girl is. It is something he tells no one, only Miranda knows about it. He told her about his dreams, about Bane taking care of him, about the girl whose fate he does not know.

“Do you remember her name?”

Miranda had a look in her eyes when she asked that, a look that seemed almost hopeful about something. It faded when he told her he didn’t remember. She did not press him too much about details, simply asked him what he was going to do about knowing that Bane had took care of him in the past. 

“Nothing. I can’t focus on that right now, I have to help with saving this place.”

In the grand scheme of things, his lost memories aren’t important. Miranda seems to understand his answer, doesn’t pester him about it too much and that makes him feel a little better. Gotham is starting to run out of time and Bruce is still no where to be seen. He does all that he can but it is running him ragged, wearing him out. He knows that he is faring better than he should, that he is able to avoid detection more than most of the other men, that he knows things he shouldn’t. John has been trained when he was younger, trained like Bane was, like his men, and he wonders why, what purpose he was to serve. A little voice in the back of his head tells him that Bane would give him the answers, that he can trust him but he ignores it. At night, it is a little easier to not think about it when he is with Miranda, just talking or doing things John is still not sure they should be doing but does anyway.

It has become a habit for them to touch each other. John is sure some of the others know or at least suspect something but nothing is said about it. They haven’t done intercourse yet, sticking with hands and mouths, but John can say that it is some of the best sex he has had. It is different with her than it had been with the few others, the only one he had felt as comfortable with being Bruce. She is playful with him in a way, her touch often teasing and possessive. Even when they are just resting, she tends to touch him, holds her body close to his. They leave room in their bedding, almost like there should be someone else with them, but he is not sure why. He spends a lot of his nights with her and it is one of the best relationships he has had even if he is hesitant to call it that. They have their own sort of domestic thing going on in the middle of this disaster. 

She is trimming his hair right now, her fingers careful in their movements. It had only been yesterday when she had pulled on it softly, commented on how long it was starting to get.

“I hate it, wished I would have gotten it cut shorter before all this.”

He had grumbled and her fingers just played with his hair some more.

“I think it looks fine but I am sure Lucius has some scissors hidden, he has almost everything, I could trim it for you tomorrow morning if it brothers you so much.”

He had looked at her with a tiny bit of shock.

“Really?”

Her fingers had let go of his hair then, her hand giving him a little smack on the head. Her voice was teasing when she spoke again. 

“I will not cut an ear off, I promise. It is something I have done before.”

He agreed and now she is trimming it as they talk quietly. She speaks about how people used to save locks of hair as mementos, as a way to remember loved ones.

“It can stay the same for a long time, that is why they would keep it.”

It makes him think of his locket, the one that Bane has now, and he wonders if the hair is still in it. 

“I had a locket once that had a piece of hair in it. I could never remember how I got it but I would hold it sometimes. I thought maybe if I held it tight enough I could remember everything.”

He isn’t sure why he is telling her this, he hadn’t even told Bruce about it, but her hands still for a moment.

“I am certain who ever gave it to you cares for you very much.”

Her voice is soft and it seems like she wants to say more but there is suddenly noise of someone coming near and it is just a moment and then Fox enters. 

“Sorry to interrupt but I have some news that you will need to give to Gordon. There is a rumor that someone from the outside will be able to come in, probably on the next supply date and it would be a good idea if there is someone to meet them.” 

It is something they have been waiting for, a chance to get information, to give information. John knows that this chance will have to be taken. He speaks with Miranda and Fox for a few minutes, makes sure they are willing to meet with whoever comes. They have to let the outside world know that the bomb is on limited time. Fox says nothing when Miranda kisses him on the cheek before he leaves to find Gordon. 

 

*^*^*^*^*

Bane had hoped that John’s curiosity would lead him to seek him out after the gift had been given but it appears that John is doing even more in his power to not get caught. It frustrates him but also makes a part of him proud that John can evade their men. Still, he had hoped that by this time the three of them would be reunited, that John would have his memories back fully. He will just have to wait a little longer. 

There is a thought that pops into his mind at times, a dark idea that he knows has started to plague Talia as well, the possibility that John may not come back to them, that he may choose this horrible place over them, may choose Wayne over them. His memories are coming to the surface but it seems that he is trying to deny them from what Talia has said. He considers Bane an enemy at this time and wants to save this place. Bane thinks about what Wayne said about John wanting to return to Gotham. It had angered him and he still refuses to believe it is the truth but a part of him worries that their John had given up on them finding him and now with his memories lost has given his devotion to Wayne, to this city. He does not tell Talia what Wayne said. She had always feared that John would want to come back here and he will not tell her anything that will bring that fear to the surface. 

Bane is unsure what will happen if John does not remember but he assures himself that their bond is strong and that there will be a way for him to come back to them. It gives him comfort to know that his little ones are spending their time together now, are becoming closer. He wishes he could be with them but for now it is enough to have Barsad with him, to have the comfort of a warm body in his bed. 

Barsad has gone out to get Talia’s latest message and so Bane waits. He works with his yarn, a hobby that he had picked up from the pit, one neither of his little ones liked as much as he does. He had taught them both simple stitches, little things to help mend their clothes, but they never did it for enjoyment like he does. He is focused on making his stitches so he does not look up when he hears footsteps.

“Do you bring her message, brother?”

“I bring more than that.”

At Barsad’s answer, he looks up, just realizing that he had heard more than one set of footsteps. Talia stands with Barsad and thought it has been a while since he has seen her, it worries him that she has come here.

“It has been a while since you have ventured here.”

She sits down next to him on the bedding, puts her head on his shoulder. 

“John is staying with Gordon tonight and there is news that I wanted to give in person.”

She does not hide the bitterness when she says Gordon’s name. The man is after all one of the few that ties their little bird to this place. Barsad sits with them as Talia speaks of her news.

“There is a rumor that agents are being sent in soon. It should be on the next supply date. If they come, John is planning on bringing them to Fox and I.”

They had wondered if the outside world would try to interfere. 

“Do you wish for us to make sure they do not reach you, sister , or something else?”

Barsad asks Talia as she stretches so that she is touching both of them. 

“You should come when they reach us. You can make sure that the truth of the bomb does not leave Gotham and besides John will be there with me.”

Bane knows exactly what Talia wants when she mentions John’s name.

“ You would have to at least attempt to flee but it would not be difficult to capture you. We would be blind to the resistance once you both are secured but it may be worth the risk.”

It would be nice to have them both back here. Bane has worried about their safety a little bit, even knowing that they are capable of defending themselves and that most in the League know not to harm either of them but there are other dangers besides the League for them. Many of the inmates they released are little more than animals, brutes that would attempt to take much from any one they think weak. Bane knows that animals can not always resist the temptation of beauty, had seen it in the pit many times and his little ones have grown into their looks, would be a temptation for many but Bane would snap the neck of any who tried. 

Barsad speaks, drawing Bane away from those thoughts. 

“We have been switching the trucks often enough that they should not be able to get near the bomb. If he is with both of you, if he is told the truth, it may help his memories to resurface faster. It could also be a chance to let him know of Wayne’s part in his separation from you.” 

The mention of Wayne makes Talia darken a little bit.

“John speaks of him sometimes, there is fondness in his voice.”

Bane strokes her hair and Barsad takes her hand, both of them comforting her.

“Wayne will never see him again. The pit is being watched and there is very little chance that he can escape.”

They discuss their plans for a few minutes more, enjoy each other’s company before Talia heads back to her post. If all goes as it should, soon Bane will be able to see their little bird in person. He looks forward to it. 

*^*^*^*^*  
Bruce understands now why Bane spoke about the light at the entrance being a torture. He stares at it, hates it. He has tried the climb once more since his first failure and that one set him back more time, time Gotham can not afford. He works on his strength, is told that it is not strength that makes the climb, though the man refuses to say much more. 

His thoughts dwell on John, on the connection Bane has with him. He replays conversations in his mind, ones he has tried to keep bottled up. They seem important now. John had spoken about a protector in hushed tones, a dew drop which is an odd name for Bane , his words had been mumbled a lot of the time, a rush of things that did not always make sense. Sometimes, he sounded like he was referring to more than one person but Bruce is not sure how much of that had to do with everything Ra’s put him through.

There is one talk that sticks out in his mind, John asking him how he got out of prison. He remembers how John asked him if he climbed out. It is only now that he realizes that John was speaking of Bane, of this pit. He has been told that a child had escaped and now he remembers John speaking of the rope, of how it can’t be trusted. 

He seeks out the old doctor. He needs confirmation that his hunch is right. The TV is still on, shows bodies strung up on a bridge. It angers him. 

“You said that it is not strength that makes the climb. Did the child use the rope?”

He needs to know.

“No, the child made the climb free of it. The child wanted to survive, feared what death in this place meant. You are not afraid of death and this is why you fail.” 

Bruce gives the man the truth, one he has tried to ignore.

“I do fear dying in this place, dying while my city needs me.”

The man looks at him and when he speaks his words are full of a challenge.

“Then make the climb like the child did.” 

It takes him a few moments to gather supplies, to steel himself but Bruce knows he can not fail this time. He puts up with a bit of teasing, finds out what the chant that he has heard means, to rise. He has fallen so far and now it is time to pick himself back up.   
He refuses the rope, thinks of John’s words. It is amazing how light he feels with out it, how much easier it is to move with out its weight. He makes it to a ledge, one that requires a leap. The fear settles into his gut and he lets it, knows he needs it right now. He takes a breath and jumps. 

The jump is over quickly and he makes it. The fear is still there but he does not mind it. He climbs forward, feels the heat of the sun and soon he is out of the pit. It is just a moment to drop the rope down, to give these people another chance, before he starts his journey to Gotham. It will take a little time but Bruce thinks of John, thinks of his city, and knows that those thoughts will help him to make it back there as soon as he can.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it has taken so long for an update. I don't have a beta so when I get stuck on things it takes me a while to unstuck them. Hopefully, people still are enjoying it and I will try to have more soon.

*^*^*^*^*  
The agents were taken care of but they did not manage to secure John and Talia. It is frustrating that he continues to run and Bane wonders once again if it would have been better to take him before the occupation. They had been unprepared to find him here. Even with the empty grave, the knowledge that he could still live, they had given him up as lost, mourned him. Finding him once again had been a miracle, something precious but it may be for naught if they cannot get him to remember, to join their side. There had been too much time put into their plans to stop them and a few in the League more loyal to Ra’s memory than to Talia who want to fulfill the man’s last mission and so they had continued with their plans for Gotham’s destruction. Bane had promised that Wayne would suffer and the fall of Gotham is the best way to fulfill that promise. Now he wonders if ensuring Gotham’s destruction will cost them their little one. 

There is around fourteen days till the bomb goes off on its own. It is still enough time to be able to leave but they will not leave with out him. There is still too much risk for Talia to revel herself to John unless they have him in their possession. Word has been spread that he is to be brought directly to Bane if found. They will not risk him being put in Crane’s court and at this point it does not matter if the resistance knows that Bane wants John for some reason. Bane will feel better once he can see their John bird again. When first they had decided on this course of action, it was decided that they would burn with this city if needed and Bane fears it may still come to pass, that they have found John once again only to join him in death. 

Bane thinks about John, about the boy he used to be and how that may have shaped the man he became. He sits in his chamber now, with both of their lockets and he remembers how much more forgiving their bird had always been, how much softer in a way than Talia and his self. He has the same fire in a way, a deep anger, but he had not been shaped in the darkness of the pit as they had been. His bond with Talia came from the pit, from the hell they both experienced there, the fact that she had been his only light in the dark. John came after the pit, a rare light Talia found, took from this place and claimed as theirs. Bane can only wait now to see if they will be able to claim him once again.

Barsad enters the chamber, his steps quiet but there is an urgency to them. Something has happened and as he had went to gather a message from Talia, Bane fears the worst in a way. He does not have to ask, as soon as he is near him, Barsad speaks, his words quick and to the point. He looks directly in Bane’s eyes, something not very many do. 

“Talia and John are both safe. From what her message contained, Gordon is planning a move on the trucks, and John is sure to be a part of it. She plans to volunteer. It will be the perfect time to round up the resistance. They will be back with you soon.”

The words are reassuring but there is still worry in Barsad’s face, a tenseness around his eyes that tells Bane there is some news that is not as reassuring. Bane stands up as Barsad takes a piece of paper from his pocket, one that Bane knows comes from one of their sources in the outside world. Bane takes it, reads it as Barsad continues to speak. 

“I was given this after Talia’s message, have not been able to let her know. He will be here soon. He will not be stopped from coming into the city. ”

Bane’s hands tightens around the paper, his fingers wrinkling it. Wayne has risen from the pit, is making his way here. He tells himself it does not matter. Once Wayne is here, Bane will see to his death if Talia deems it necessary. 

“Let her know. Wayne may die with his city after all.” 

Barsad nods once, just a quick jerk of his head. He starts to make his way back out but Bane stops him by grabbing his arm. There is something he must know. 

“Will you still take them from here if I must stay behind?” 

Bane will see this to its end but he would prefer that it not be their end.   
Barsad answers with out hesitation. 

“Only if I must, if there is no other way. Otherwise I will be by your side, whatever may happen, what ever you and Talia may choose.”

His loyalty is absolute and Bane appreciates it. 

“You are a true brother.” 

Barsad seems to glow a bit at the praise and Bane clasps him upon his shoulder before he leaves. Talia will have the news soon and he is sure that in a few days they will be able to see each other face to face, plan what will happen now. Whatever Talia decides to do, Bane will see done. 

*^*^*^*^*  
Talia walks the streets, her body close to John’s. It is important that she is here to mark the trucks and she looks forward to when this is over, when finally she and John will be back with Bane. She has had to wait so long, most of the resistance too afraid to move, to upset the triggerman. It took quite a bit of convincing on John’s and Gordon’s parts to get everyone to agree that with only eight days till the bomb goes off, that something needed to be done. Still many would not participate and it had given Talia an opening that she needed and it was not difficult to ask John to take her to Gordon. He moves beside her and she is reminded of that winter day long ago when he first walked with her. 

“You don’t have to do this.”

His words are soft and she knows that he worries about her. He looks at her as they make their way to Gordon. There is still fire in his eyes and such fondness for her even if he has still not connected her with his past. He is nervous but so very brave and she is struck once again by the fact that he is willing to die for this place. It fills her with a jealousy that makes her fingers tighten around the trigger where it is hidden in her pocket. She has been so careful with it, could not allow John to see it. It takes a moment for her to loosen her grip on it, to remind herself that he left Gotham for her once and soon he will do so again. Her hand leaves her pocket and takes his instead. 

“I want to.” 

It is all she has to say and it seems to calm him. He has been so very shaken up the last few days, so very upset about almost being caught. He had spoken to her about it, told her how a part of him wanted to see Bane, to know about the girl but that he can not risk his capture. His memories seem to be coming back but they are blurry to him and she can see that he feels deserted in a way, that he still does not understand all that has happened. She had longed to tell him the truth but knew it must wait. She comforted him, put her claim on him. There is a bruise on his throat, from her bite, a mark for the world to see, one she hopes Wayne will see if he returns before they are gone. 

John Bird had been sweet for her in the way she knew he would be. The noises he made for her were better than the ones he had made for Wayne. She explored his body, touched every bit of skin as if she could erase Wayne’s touch from him. It had been painful when she realized that he did not just belong to them anymore, that he gave himself to Wayne. It will not matter, Talia will ensure that he will be by their side soon even if she has to take him from here by force. She does not dwell on the fact that John may be angry once he knows everything, instead she holds his hand tighter and thinks about her plans. 

She is pulled out of her thoughts once they find Gordon. John’s hand squeezes hers as she speaks to the Commissioner, as she offers her assistance. She can see the ways his eyes look over them both, lingering over their joined hands and the mark on John’s neck. There is no reason for her to hide her relationship with John, no one sees it as anything suspicious. 

“We need anyone who is willing to help. I will explain as we go.” 

Gordon does not talk down to her and Talia appreciates it in a way. Their plan is not a bad one per say but it will not work out for them. They do not have enough men to stage a true revolt and they will be captured soon. If any manage to escape, Talia will make certain there is enough confusion about the trucks that they will be unable to do much. Gordon hands her the device, a foolish move on his part even if he does not know it. 

“You may be able to get closer than I can. John, you are our look out, on the escape over there.”   
This could complicate her plans. John will be further away, in a safer location in a way, harder to catch. She wonders if that is why Gordon wants him there, some attempt to keep him safe. 

“Sir, I can do more on the ground.” 

John is stubborn, trying to make a case to stay with therm. There is a little bit of worry in his eyes and he looks over at her, concern in his face. Gordon for his part is calm when he speaks, his words reasonable. There is a look of almost fatherly affection on his face when he addresses John. 

“We need someone there we can trust. You will do the best job of any of us.” 

The answer seems to be enough for John and he starts to move to the escape, stopping only for a moment to face her, to grip her hand and clasp it tightly. 

“Be careful.”

She nods at his whisper , squeezes his hand one more time before she continues on her way with Gordon. 

Marking the truck goes as it should and she makes sure that the wrong one is marked and they are captured just as they had planned but John is not taken with them. Talia assures herself that he will be found before this place dies, that if not he will try to come to her. It will only be a little while and then John will have to make a choice and Talia is certain, he will make the right one.   
*^*^*^*^*  
Less than a week and Gotham will be destroyed. It is not much time but it is time and this is what John has to tell himself after the others are captured. He still has to do something and the only thing he can think of is to get those who are trapped out. 

He moves quickly through the city, trying to stay hidden as much as possible. They have been looking for him almost nonstop, the rumor being that he is to be taken directly to Bane. He will allow himself to be captured but not until he knows that there are other people who can fight. From what he knows, Miranda is still alive and he is determined to find her. If he gets captured he might be able to see her and he knows for sure that he will be able to be near the trigger. The only person he thinks Bane would trust with it would be the girl but as far as John knows she is not here and so Bane must hold it himself. 

His memories are still blurry but more is coming to the surface, causing everything to feel at odds in a way. He knows that he was left behind somehow, that the girl and Bane were not there, that someone promised to help him. He still doesn’t know who brought him back to Gotham or why but his past is something he can worry about later. Now, he has to help the city. 

The ally he moves through right now is familiar to him, being so close to St. Swithin’s. There is snow all around him and as he walks a memory suddenly hits him. He was around seven and so very angry, running through this ally till someone stopped him, pinned him down. The girl asks questions, gives him a name. It is odd after all this time to finally remember what she is called. 

Talia, the name seems to echo in his mind in this moment but he cannot focus on it right now. He has to make it to the pothole as they switch guards. He knocks out the one nearest to it, knows he only has a small window of opportunity. He is slightly surprised that there is only one here, there used to be more guards. They may be planning to leave and John knows that it is even more important to get everyone out now. The cover comes off easily enough and it is with relief he starts to pull his partner from the opening. The sound of the shot makes his heart thunder in his chest and the body dropping fills him with despair. He is surrounded quickly, dragged away from the cover. 

“Tell me your name.”

The man demands as John is pushed forward. He feels defiant in this moment, knows that even if he doesn’t answer more than likely he will be taken to Bane and so he doesn’t. He is thrown to the ground, landing hard on his knees. His chin is grabbed harshly, face tilted up so that it can be looked at. 

“Is your name John Blake?”

John won’t answer . The lack of answer is taken as confirmation of who he is if the fact that he is being pulled up is an indication, the one in charge saying something about Bane waiting for him at the courthouse. There are only about four of them, maybe John could fight them off. Before he can make a move, someone comes from the shadows, attacks the men furthest from him. It is enough of distraction that John is able to fight the ones near him. It is a few minutes but soon the men are on the ground and Batman stands in front of him. John has never been so relieved to see someone in his life. 

Bruce comes forward , looks John over and his hand goes to John’s neck , fingers on the bruise there. John can’t help but shiver at the touch. 

“That’s not from them.” 

He knows he is blushing and he is sure that Bruce knows what the mark is but there isn’t time to talk about it. They need to get the men out, need to find the trigger. Bruce is looking at him, his eyes hard to see because of the mask but there is something that looks both like guilt and relief and almost jealously in them. John ignores it, starts rambling, words just pouring out. 

“Bane knows me, has been trying to find me. I am starting to remember but I still don’t know everything. I need to find Miranda.”

Bruce grabs his arm, not too tight but just enough to hold him still.

“You need to get out of here, lead people to the tunnels to the bridge. I will find her John, take care of Bane but I need someone trying to get people out of here if I can’t stop the bomb.” 

“Are you going to kill Bane?” 

There is a slight bit of worry in John’s voice and he is not happy that it is there.It shouldn’t matter if he dies or not. He has arranged all of Gotham to burn but there is a part of John that doesn’t want him to die, that can still remember the feeling of safety he had around him, the feeling of being protected. Bruce lets go of his arm at his question. 

“I don’t kill. I am going to stop him, John. I don’t know what he will do if he gets you so I need you away from him.” 

He wants to argue but soon Bruce is opening up the covering and then blowing the rubble. There is so much he wants to say, so much that needs to be said but there doesn’t seem to be time. Batman leaves and John goes to St. Swithin’s. He will get the kids to spread the word, get them to a tunnel or a bridge and then he will make his way back towards the center of the city. 

*^*^*^*^*

Bruce works his way to the courthouse, has to find out where Bane has the trigger. There is still time and he just hopes that John does leave the city. He will find Miranda, keep the promise he made to both of them. He knows without being told that they must be together in a way. He will not let himself think about the jealousy he felt at the thought, of seeing that mark on John’s neck. Neither of them were ever really his, he has no claim. After all this is over, he will find him, tell him the truth and deal with the fact that John may never want to see him again. 

The police are fighting but most of who they are fighting seems to be blackgate men. Bane’s men have seemed to be waiting for something, getting ready to leave. It could be as simple as with only a few days left they do not want to burn with the city but Bruce thinks it may be something else. The bomb hasn’t been triggered or Gordon has already gotten to it. 

There is so much fighting but the only person he is concerned with is Bane. When he charges at Bruce this time, he is ready. The mask is his main concern. If everything he was told is correct , the mask eases pain. He manages to get Bane into the courthouse, rips the tubes. The result is what he had hoped for, the man stumbles in his pain. The only person in the court house is Miranda and she runs to them. 

“Bolt the door.” 

She runs to do that and his attention is focused on Bane, questions him where the trigger is. When he speaks, looks at him with pain filled eyes, it is not an answer.

“I broke you. How did you leave the pit?” 

“John told me once how you escaped.” 

He stresses John’s name, wants Bane to know that John trusted him with Bane’s story. 

“I did not escape.” 

The words are simple, sound like the truth but Bruce can not believe it. He grabs Bane’s vest, holds the man closer.

“The child of Ra’s al Ghul made the climb.” 

“He is not the child of Ra’s al Ghul. I am.” 

The words are spoken near his ear, the voice so familiar. Bruce is not sure which hurts more, the knife in his side or knowing whose voice it is . He drops Bane, the man slumps down. The knife twists deeper into his side and Bruce feels that this may finally be his end.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I kept changing things with this chapter for a bit but I think it works. Also this fic is the longest thing I have ever written and it is not even finished yet.

*^*^*^*^*  
After Bruce left John made his way to St. Switihins, got some of the older kids to spread the word about the bomb going off soon. The bridge would be the safest way out but last John knew people still weren’t being allowed to cross due to the threat of the trigger. It would take time to convince whoever was in charge that they needed to be able to leave and time was something John didn’t want to waste right now. 

The tunnels would be the best option if there was a way to clear one out. He had gone outside to think when he heard noise, some of the kids causing a bit of a commotion. John was a bit surprised to see Kyle of all people with one of Batman’s bikes but she would probably be desperate to get out of here. 

“I can clear it out but then I’m out of here. If you want to bring them, they can be the first out.” 

John gets Father Riley to gather everyone up, says they can trust her. John is entirely convinced that it is the truth but there are not many options right now. Thankfully, the tunnels weren’t guarded at this point, Bane’s men too busy else where. The bike clears the tunnel and Father Riley starts moving the kids and others through. John hangs back, gets ready to leave when Kyle grabs his arm. She stands close to him, speaks quietly. 

“Look, you should go with them. I don’t think he is going to win this fight. You didn’t see the first one, Bane broke him. Whatever past you had with Bane, with him, you should run far away from it.” 

Her words sound strangely sincere and something about them makes him ask her a question. 

“Was something said about me during the fight?” 

John doesn’t know if she will answer but the question still comes out. He knows that when she said him, she meant Wayne. Did Bruce know something about his past with Bane? This question races through his mind as he waits for her to answer. She seems to think about it a moment before speaking.

“I couldn’t hear everything but Bane said something about you being taken, hidden here. It isn’t any of my business but Wayne asked me to when I left to try to get you to as well. I owe him.”

John shakes her arm off.

“You can leave but I have to go back. The kids are getting out of here but there is someone I need to make sure is ok.”

“He wouldn’t leave either.”

It is the last thing she says to him before he walks away. It doesn’t matter if she stays or goes, John has to make his way to the courthouse. Something has settled into his gut with this new knowledge he has, a sense of worry that maybe Bruce had known more about John then he let on. They can talk about it latter, once everything is settled. John just hopes they both make it through this fight. 

 

*^*^*^*^*

The look of utter shock and pain etched on Wayne’s face as he mutters her false name fills Talia with a dark sort of pleasure. This is all his doing in a way, all this pain that he has brought to his city, to himself. There is no reason for him to not know her real name now and she gives it to him calmly. 

“Talia. It is what my mother called me before she was taken from me. I was saved by my protector, by Bane.” 

Talia speaks to him of her true self and as she does so she fixes the tubes of Bane’s mask. Her fingers are gentle in that task but her other hand keeps the knife in Wayne’s side. The wound is deep but not enough to kill. Talia will not kill him, she wants him to have to listen as she tells John the truth .For now she speaks of her past, wants him to know all he has done to her. She tells him of finding her father, of the promise he gave her to get Bane out of the pit.

“But first he brought me here and that is when I found John. He had no one left and he was the only beautiful thing I had seen in this place and so I brought him to my father, took him from here. Bane was taken from the pit, the doctor and the men had already done their damage to my friend.” 

Bane’s mask is working again and he gets up slowly, fetches rope to restrain Wayne. She pulls the trigger out of her pocket as she continues her story, speaks about their training, about her father exiling Bane. 

“His only crime that he loved me, loved us.”

“You left with him, left John behind with Ra’s, left him to…”

Wayne does not get the rest of his words out as Bane tightens the rope around his neck briefly. Talia knows that he does not like the accusation in Wayne’s tone, that she abandoned their little bird. He will choke the life out of him, Talia can see and so she moves her hand with the trigger up, a signal to loosen the hold. Bane does so but does not let go of Wayne. She can see Wayne’s eyes watching her fingers as they hold the trigger. She speaks again, fingers moving over it, a threat that until John is here she will not carry out but Wayne does not know that. 

“My father made sure to hide him away from me, from us. He was determined to keep one of his heirs and he wanted to sever John’s ties to us. Barsad stayed to try to get close, to get John from there but none were allowed around him without my father close by, none but you. I believe my father wanted to replace us with you, give John a tie to the League but you did not stay the path you were supposed to. ” 

There is a look of pain in Wayne’s eyes when she speaks about her father using him. Talia removes the knife. The wound is not too deep, it would not do for him to bleed out before John is here. Bane moves him deeper into the courthouse and Talia follows, still speaking.

“My father made sure that we thought John was dead and it was not until after you murdered him that I saw the empty grave, knew you had taken him, but you did not keep him. He was lost to us because of you, because of this city. We made our plans , bid our time, and then by fate , I found him again. Our lost little bird was here, hidden in plain sight the whole time.”

She presses her fingers against his wound. As she does so, she speaks about how they watched him, watched John, watched as he spoke about his past and how Wayne never gave him the answers he deserved, how soon John would be brought here and told the truth , how John will be taken from here again, taken from him. Wayne tries to struggle away from Bane’s grip but Bane just increases his grip on Wayne’s shoulders. 

“John is willing to die for Gotham, he won’t go with you while the city burns.”

Wayne spits his words out, anger in his face. Talia knows what he says is the truth but there is a way for her to get her vengeance against this man, to make him hurt, and to still have her little bird come back home. 

“John is ours, has started to remember, he will take his place again and you will watch as he does so.” 

She does not speak of Gotham’s fate, that will be known once John is here. For now, they wait.  
*^*^*^*^*  
There is so much fighting in the streets but Barsad manages to avoid most of it, focused on the task Talia gave him. He had stayed near the courthouse long enough to see Wayne show up, to know that John was not with him. Once he knew that Wayne would be taken care of by his brother and sister, he made his way from there to start his search for John, to bring him back to them. 

He moves quickly, a few other searching as well. A few men stay with the trucks, those more loyal to Ra’s memory than to Talia but most follow Talia’s orders to get ready to evacuate soon. It had been disappointing to not catch John with the others in the resistance as they planned but there is still time to get him now. They are certain he would not flee the city. Even with the small interaction Barsad had with him when he was younger, he knows how stubborn John can be. 

The locket is in his pocket, the chain fixed. He had brought it with him, being entrusted to give it to John as a way to get him to come along perhaps willingly. There is a syringe with a light tranquilizer if John does struggle too much. He want to get John back to the courthouse as quickly as possible. 

It takes a while but Barsad does find him moving towards the center of the city. He is doing his best to not be noticed but he is seen slipping into one of the allyways. Barsad makes sure that some of the others surround it before making his presence known to John. He steps into the ally, he does not raise his gun to John, instead takes the locket out of his pocket holding it so that John can see it. John is tense, his whole body tightens but he makes no move towards or away from Barsad.

“Hello, little one. I kept this safe for you once again and now I am giving it back to you as I should have the first time, instead of trusting it to another.”

He tosses it to him and when John catches it; his face has a mix of emotions playing across it, relief at having it back and confusion over Barsad’s words. Barsad knows from what Talia has said that his memories have surfaced but not fully and so he is not aware of Barsad’s part in his past, his part in John forgetting those memories in the first place. Barsad will make amends later but first he must get John back to them. 

“It is time for you to come to Bane. He has waited a very long time to see you again. You are very precious to him, little one, he does not want harm to come to you.”

John fingers tighten around the locket as he speaks, anger thick in his voice. There is such fire in him and Barsad can see why he was theirs so long ago.

“They left me. He might have cared once but now he is burning my home to the ground.”

His face is neutral, a much practiced mask but Barsad can hear the hurt in his voice. Barsad makes a signal to the others as he moves towards John.

“This is not your home and you were not left behind by choice. You were kept from them, made to forget, till you were taken back here by one I thought would help but instead he has lied, kept you hidden away but now you will be brought back to them.”

John can sense the others coming towards them and he makes to move but there are too many of them. He drops his locket in the struggle to get out of the ally. He does not make it. Barsad makes certain not to step on it as he makes his way to where a few of the others hold him. He pulls the sedative out of his pocket and John’s eyes widen a bit and his struggles increase. 

Barsad is gentle as he pulls John’s sleeve up, sees the marks on his arm form before. There seems to be a panic rising in John, something in his eyes that looks so familiar. This situation must be triggering a bit of memory in him. He places the needle gently in his arm, the movement one that used to be well practiced.

“This is not like before. It will not make you lose yourself, you will just rest for a bit.”

This does not calm John down much but the drug works its way through his system and his eyes flutter close after a few moments. Barsad picks the locket up from the ground and puts it where it belongs before they make their way back to the courthouse. 

 

*^*^*^*^*  
The sounds of the struggles in the street can still be heard inside the courthouse but no others make their way in so Bane pays no attention to it. The mask is working again but he still feels lingering traces of the pain that Wayne made flare up when he damaged it. He has tied Wayne to one of the pillars, secured him tightly but he stands by in case Wayne should struggle out of it. Bane would have no qualms about killing him but Talia wishes for him to remain alive and so he does for now. He will not go against her wishes, knows about what she has been thinking about doing and he will follow her lead. If she asks him to stay, he will, if she asks him to go with them, spare this place, he will. If she asks him to burn with both of them, he will but he would prefer that they live, remembers the promise he made Barsad swear. 

He is pulled out of his thoughts when Wayne moves in his bonds. He puts pressure on the wound, pushes Wayne against the pillar more, tightens the ropes. The man lets out a slight grunt of pain. Bane pushes on the wound once more before moving away from Wayne once again, keeping him in sight. Talia comes closer to them, stands next to Bane, takes his hand in hers.

“He will be here soon and then this will be over one way or another.” 

Bane squeezes her hand as she says these words, a silent sign of support before speaking soft so that Wayne will not hear. 

“Whatever happens this place will not be the same as before but I will be yours as always.” 

It is a reassurance to her, words Bane needed her to hear. She returns the squeeze of his hand, a soft look in her eyes but before she can speak there is the sound of footsteps entering the room that they are in and they turn to see who it is. 

Barsad enters with a few others, an unconscious figure being carried with them. Bane is filled with a bit of relief that he has been found. John is placed gently on the ground and he and Talia both move towards him. He can hear Talia dismissing the others, telling Barsad to stay but his focus is on John. He sits down beside him, pulls him so that his head is in his lap. 

“I did not want to risk him trying to run from me once we were closer to here. He will awaken soon, the sedative is not that strong.” 

Barsad speaks softly and Talia thanks him with a short kiss.  
The locket is once again around John’s neck and Bane traces his fingers over it before splaying his hand across John’s chest, feeling the beat of his heart. His lips curl into a smile underneath the mask at being able to touch him again, to have him with them again. He looks him over, silently marveling at the changes he can see. Bane knows Wayne is watching, can feel his anger at Bane being near John but it does not dampen his joy at seeing his lost little one after so long.

His fingers touch a mark on his throat, a bruise. Talia has knelt down beside them and when her fingers go over his, he looks at her and there is a small smile that flashes across her face that lets Bane know that the mark is her doing. She has claimed him in the way Bane always knew she would. He is sure they were beautiful together and perhaps he will be able to see it one day, join if they want him. 

They stay like this for a few moments, quiet waiting for John to awake. Barsad is near Wayne , guarding him and allowing them this time. Bane feels John’s pulse change, knows he will awaken soon. He keeps him in his lap, speaks to him as his eyes start to flutter.

“You are where you should be. It has been so long but we are with you again.We will not allow you to be taken again.”

It is a promise. John tries to move but Bane only allows him to sit up, keeps him close. He is so very groggy and Talia shifts towards him, takes his hand. Bane can see his eyes look over her, lingering on the locket she had put back on, the one that is a match to his. 

“I am sorry that I could not tell you before John Bird.”

Talia speaks to him, her voice sweet when she says her name for him. John starts to shake, in shock or fear Bane is not sure but he holds him closer and Talia keeps his hand in hers. It is a moment before anything is said and when John speaks it is a beautiful sound to Bane. It is one word but it fills him with hope that all will go as it should. John breathes it out, his eyes never leaving her face, looking at her as if something has clicked into place finally.

“Dewdrop.” 

*^*^*^*^*


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, big chapter but I just didn't want to break it up.

*^*^*^*^*

When John comes to, the first thing he feels is the warmth of anther body and he can hear the sound of soft breathing with a mechanical sound to it. The voice is speaking soon, words that sound like they are meant to be a comfort and John knows that it is Bane who holds him so tight. He tries to move away but Bane sits him up, holds him close. His arms are tight around John, firm but not bruising. It feels so familiar and safe. It takes a moment to focus and when he does, he feels a familiar touch against his hand and sees Miranda near him.

He is so relieved to see her, to know she is safe but something doesn’t quite feel right. She is unbound, does not look afraid of being so close to Bane. Her hair is pulled back, the clothing that she was captured in she is no longer wearing. She looks different in away but almost more recognizable as well. There is a chain around her neck, a locket, that looks like the one he can feel around his own. She can see him looking at it and when she speaks there is fondness in her voice and just a bit of apology.

“I am sorry that I could not tell you before John Bird.”

As soon as John Bird is spoken, he can feel things shifting in his head, knows exactly who she is. Bane holds him tight while he shakes and then a word is coming out of his mouth, one that makes her face light up slightly.

“Dewdrop.” 

The girl from his past had been here the whole time, in front of him. He is upset he didn’t know, didn’t see through her mask. He feels so confused, so conflicted, anger and relief at the memories that seem clearer now. Some of it is still hidden from him. Miranda, no he knows that is not her name now, Talia, speaks to him.

“I have waited so long for you to call me that again.”

Her hand tightens around his a bit, not so much that it hurts just enough so he can’t move it. She leans forward and he feels like he should move away from her but Bane holds him still as she kisses his cheek. It is such a familiar gesture, has always felt reassuring, comforting when she did it and now he knows why. He needs time to think about this, to figure out what this all means . Time is something that is limited right now. 

“How much have you remembered, little bird?”

Bane’s words are soft, filled with curiosity. Even with the metallic sound to his voice, John can hear a soft tone to it, one that is so different than how he sounded making his grand speeches. John thinks about not answering, ignoring them, fighting his way out of Bane’s hold but a part of him just feels so glad to have them back in a way.He wants to tell them, wants to know if he will finally get some answers before all of their time runs out.

“Bits and pieces. I remember some of it but not much after you left me. I had dreams for a long time but they went away, only came back when I saw you for what I thought was the first time.”

He says this to Talia, doesn’t disguise the feeling of betrayal in his voice. She had known about their past this whole time, never told him, let him grow close to her even as she had planned for all this to befall Gotham. 

“You spent time with me, talked with me. I told you when I started to remember, worried about it, and you said nothing.”

The words spill out of his mouth , harsh and filled with pain. The whole thing is lot to take in, to know now why everything with her had felt so comfortable. He tries to pull his hand away, move out of Bane’s arms, but he is still weak from the sedative and they will not let him go. Talia rubs circles on his hand with her thumb as she starts to speak again. 

“We did not expect you to be here. We thought you lost .My father had spent so much time to get you to forget us and when I first saw you here, you had no idea who I was. I wanted you to remember on your own, gave you hints to draw things forward. I could not risk my mask being broken until we had you with Bane, away from the resistance. ”

There is sadness about her when she talks about him being lost. He still is not being allowed to move, to look away from them, but he knows that they are not the only ones here. There is noise coming from a little bit away, static from a radio, and then an order given and some other noise that he can’t focus on, not with Bane and Talia both so near him, touching him in soothing ways. He wants to feel angry and he does but being close to them feels so right in a way that it difficult to lash out at them, every instinct in him telling him he is supposed to be with them. He still wants to know why they have done all this

“So you came here to destroy my home. Why?”

Talia’s face darkens when he says the word home and Bane’s arms tighten around him just a little bit more, as if he is afraid John will disappear somehow.

“ Your home is with us, John Bird, you decided that long ago. Gotham is a corrupt place, you know that. It needs to be cleansed. This was my father’s last mission, the one he died for, and many asked for me to take up his cause. I loved my father, even with all he had done to me and there was no way to make him suffer anymore , for him to realize his mistakes and ask for forgiveness. You were gone and the one who took you had saved this city and I wished for him to suffer.”

They keep speaking about the one who took him and John is starting to think that he has been lied to more than he knows. It is a heavy feeling in his gut, this idea that everything that has happened had more to do with him than he realized. 

“It is time for you to know everything, all the lies you have been told.”

Bane says this as if he knows what John is thinking. Before he can ask, Talia lets go of his hand starts to rise from her spot as she speaks, keeping her eyes looking into his.

“We will not be separated again,John bird. I will not allow it.” 

It sounds like both a promise and a threat. Her voice is commanding, firm, just a little bit gentle when she says his name, but her eyes look past him and he knows that part of her statement is directed to someone else as well. When her eyes leave his the gentleness is gone from them, replaced with anger at whoever her gaze is at now. 

Bane starts to get up as well, pulls John up with him. When he is turned so that he can see who else is here, Bane has his hands on his shoulders and Talia is right next to him, puts her hand on his arm to guide him closer to a pillar. Their touch is claiming in a way, soft but firm enough that he knows it would be difficult to fight out of it. 

The man who drugged him stands next to it. It takes just a moment and John remembers his name, Barsad. Tied to the pillar is Bruce, ropes wrapped around him tightly and there is darker spot in his suit, one that John realizes is blood. He wants to go to him, untie him, figure out what all this has been about, but Bane’s hands keep him still and root him to the spot. Talia’s fingers tighten around his arm briefly before letting go. She moves towards Bruce, crouches down when she gets near him, and for a moment John worries that she is going to attack him. She leans towards Bruce, whispers something to him that John can’t hear. This whole situation fills him with dread and he wants to get closer but Bane keeps him still, his hands firm on his shoulders, his fingers digging in slightly. Bruce seems to be struggling in his bonds but he is not speaking and Talia stands up, moves back towards John.

“You should not worry about him.” Bane says from behind him, his voice so calm, “He is the reason for much of this.”

Those words make something inside of John darken even further, makes him feel even more betrayed in a way. He had always felt a sense of comfort around Bruce, a sense of familiarity that put him at ease, and it seems there may have been a reason for it. He thinks about the guilt he saw in Bruce’s face sometimes, the fact that his name almost seemed to mean something to Alfred, and it is like a picture is forming of something John does not want to think about.

“Will someone just tell me what is going on?”

John almost shouts, all the frustration evident in his voice, and his body is almost shaking again. All he wants now is to know the truth, to know what these next few moments are going to hold. He has a horrible feeling that everything he thought he knew is about to crash down upon, go up in flames just as the city might. 

*^*^*^*^*  
Everything since the knife slipped into his side, sharp and unexpected just like the betrayal she had organized, has been a bit of a blur to Bruce. He remembers her speaking of her past, being dragged to the pillar, struggling a bit as Bane tied him, made sure his gauntlets had been removed before, and then drifting in and out of pain and worry. Time has passed and he is not sure how much is still left for his city and now John is here and he knows that the next few moments are going to be painful no matter what happens. 

It had been difficult to watch John being brought here, to see how Bane had immediately went to him, cradled him in a way that was gentler than Bruce would have thought that man capable of. To watch Talia go to them, to know he hadn’t seen through her, had allowed her control of the bomb. John awakes after a few moments, groggy but he does not flinch much from their touch, seems calmer in their presence than he should. Bruce wants to get John out of here in this moment, wants to take him from here before Talia and Bane can use their connection with him to get him to do whatever it is they want him to. He tries to struggle in his bonds but Barsad is next to him, watches closely and stills him. Barsad speaks into the radio, something about St. Swithin’s but most of Bruce’s attention is on John, on trying to figure out what Talia’s next play is. 

It is not long until Talia makes her way to Bruce, Bane guide John to a spot a little bit away but facing him. He can see John’s concern for him, his confusion over everything that is happening but his attention is pulled away when Talia is next to him, facing him. She speaks, her voice whisper soft, close to his ear. 

“He could never be just yours. My little bird is so sweet that he may want to save you, this place, but he will still be leaving it with us and you will not be able to stop it. I can be cruel enough for both of us if I must. ”

There is a venom to her words, a bitterness and Bruce wonders how she could have sounded so sweet in her mask, how her voice had sounded so tender when speaking to John before. He wants to get out of his bonds, if he could get close enough, he might be able to get the trigger from her. She moves away quickly, moves back to John and Bruce can hear his words and he looks at him , sees the slight anger in his eyes and he knows that the next few moments are going to hurt him and there is nothing about it he can do. 

“Will you tell him now, Bruce? Tell him of how you brought him here from the ruins of the League, placed him back into the system without much of a thought? How you never felt the need to tell him that you knew him before he came to your door?” 

Bruce hears Talia’s words and John’s eyes widen slightly but Bruce can see how his mind is working out the piece and he tries not to feel hurt when John’s face tightens when he speaks, when he starts to move forward. Bane moves with him, hands still on his shoulders, holding him away from Bruce still. Talia stands next to them, her face calm but there is brightness in her eyes at telling John this. There is noise coming from the entrance, people coming in. 

“Is that true? You brought me here and you never said a word?” 

John is shaking, his voice filled with hurt and anger and so soft that Bruce almost hadn’t heard it. He can’t look away from John right now but it is important to get out of his ties, to get them both out of here and so he does not speak yet. One of the ropes feels looser and Bruce works on it, tries to do it as subtly as possible as a few of Talia’s men enter, as Bane holds John, speaks to him. He knows he needs to do something soon.

“He knew that I had found out about you being here before the cat led him to me, had a chance to tell you and instead took what you offered so freely out of your affection for him. He has wronged us all greatly but perhaps no more than you, John Bird. ” 

Bruce almost has himself free and it is so hard to focus on that, on trying not to lash out as he hears Bane try to twist John against him. Instead, he speaks calmly, directing his words to John and trying to get him to focus on him instead of the others. 

“I did what I thought best, you had a clean slate. I will explain later but they still have the trigger, are going to destroy all of Gotham and I know that is something you don’t want.”

He pleads with John, knows that John is still the same decent person that came to him about Gotham, no matter what memories may have surfaced. Talia has gestured at a few of her men as he spoke and they come forward getting ready to take him just as he frees himself from the ropes. He can see John try to come forward but Bane has wrapped his arms around him, pulls him away from the fight even as he struggles. Talia moves with them and he can hear her saying something to John even if he can’t make her words out through the noise of the struggle with her men. He manages to stop the first from grabbing him, twists away but he is fully surrounded and soon he is forced to the ground once again, Barsad’s gun pointed directly at his head and he waits for the shot. 

John is still struggling in Bane’s arms as they come back into Bruce’s sight. Talia stands next to them. Her eyes stare into his and she has pulled out the trigger once again, weighs it in her hand as she speaks. Her hand raises and Bruce knows that it is a command for his death.

“Don’t kill him, Talia, please don’t.” 

John’s words are sharp, pleading, and he is still trying to get out of Bane’s hold. Talia looks as if she has expected this and moves her hand down and the shot doesn’t come. There is a sinking feeling in Bruce’s stomach as she goes to John, places her hand on his cheek. He knows whatever comes next is not something he is going to like.

*^*^*^*^*  
Wayne is pinned down, all it would take is one word and Barsad will pull the trigger and end his life. Talia hears her bird’s plea, stops his execution and goes to John. John is struggling in Bane’s arms but his muscles are still weak from the sedative and so there is no way for him to make his way to Wayne. She touches his cheek, makes sure his eyes are focused on her. This is the moment that he will have to make his choice.

“You still care about him, do not wish him to die, even after learning about his lies?”

John says nothing but she can see the truth in his eyes. She hates that he cares for Wayne but it will work to their advantage. She starts to speak.

“St. Swithian’s has made it out of one of the tunnels. The children you looked after are safe, no harm will come to them now. I would have had them taken out for you any way, I know that you care for them. I wanted you to know this before I speak about what is to happen.”

John’s eyes stare at her in worry, his body tense as Bane holds him. His voice shakes only slightly as he talks.

“Are you going to pull that trigger? Burn my home to the ground?”

“ Your home is with us and we will be leaving soon, John, and you will be coming with us. ” 

He shakes his head at her, tries to get her hand to move from his cheek.  
“John, you left Gotham once, you can do it again.”

Bane says this, his voice so calm. She knows her little bird needs convincing.

“We will sedate you again, shoot Wayne but not a killing shoot, and as soon as we are away from the city limits, I will press the trigger so that his city will burn as he bleeds out. It is what this place may deserve and I will not hesitate to do so.”

John looks horrified at her words and she tells herself that this may seem cruel but she is willing to be so if it means they will be together as they should. 

“ I would hate you.” 

He spits it out at her, flinches away from her as she learns forward more. She can hear Wayne trying to move in the background but she is certain her men will keep him there. She stares at John, her sweet little bird, for just a moment before speaking again. 

“Only for a time but I do not wish to cause you unneeded pain. If you come with us willingly, Gotham will be given a chance to perhaps change its fate. One that I am uncertain that it deserves but am willing to give it for you to come back to us.”

“What chance?”

His voice has just a bit of uncertainty in it and it pleases her to know that he is listening.

“There is still a little bit of time left and I have pulled most of the men from their posts, only a few still remain with the trucks, ones who are determined to see my father’s will carried out no matter my wishes. Those who are loyal to me would leave with us, not interfere with anything that is to happen, none of the tunnels would be watched, if Gotham could band together, the bomb could be taken, perhaps reconnected. The trigger will not be pushed.” 

She can hear Wayne try to plead, to tell John there is another way but John’s attention is on her, just as it should be. 

“How do I know you won’t push the trigger once we are out of here?”

She knows that she almost has him.

“It will be in your hands. I will not give it to you until we are at the city limits. If I think you are trying to run from us or trying to get any of the police’s attention, I will push it. I promised you that we will not be separated again.” 

Her little bird knows that she means it, that she would not hesitate. She would rather them all burn than for John to try to leave them again. He takes a deep breath, closes his eyes for just a moment. She allows him to think, waits for his answer, in just a few moments all of this will be decided. 

When he speaks, it is a question and she knows that John is very close to making his choice.  
*^*^*^*^*  
“What will happen to Bruce?”

John feels so conflicted, knows that Talia is asking him to choose her once again, and this is the only thing he needs to know before he makes his choice. Even knowing that Bruce has lied, has kept the truth from him, he doesn’t want him hurt.

“I should kill him for all he has cost you ,little one, but his life will be spared if you wish it.’ 

Bane has loosened his hold slightly and John can hear the truth in his words. He feels like he should be more scared than he is but enough of his past has surfaced that he feels safe with them, whole in a way. He doesn’t want to lose them again and he thinks that they both know this, do not want to lose him either. Talia still holds the trigger, watches his face as she speaks. 

“He will be let go, free to try to help his city but if he tries to stop us from leaving, he tries to follow us once we leave, he will be killed and I may be forced to end Gotham.”

He knows that she means it. Bane lets go of him now, they are certain that he will not fight at this time. The moment feels heavy, everyone waiting for his answer. He has made up his mind, knows that there is no going back now. He is about to give it when he hears Bruce’s voice.

“I gave Gordon a way to block the signal, you don’t have to give in to them.”

His voice is desperate, pleading. John moves closer to him and it is allowed this time. He looks at Bruce, so many emotions rolling around inside of him.

“She marked the trucks.”

It is a simple statement and as soon as he says it, he can see Bruce realize exactly what he means by it. Talia gestures towards Barsad who moves away but keeps his gun pointed at Bruce. All the other men move away, start to go towards the exits but they are watching, ready to attack if Bruce makes a move. Bane stands next to Talia, waiting.Talia holds out her hand, the one that doesn’t hold the trigger, the gesture so similar to the one in the ally so long ago. 

“John Bird, your choice.”

Her words sound calm but he can hear just the slightest hesitation in them. John moves towards her and Bruce doesn’t stop him. 

“John”

Bruce calls out his name but he doesn’t turn to look at him. He has made his choice and now it is time to follow through. He takes her hand, feels the warmth of it, and prepares himself to leave Gotham once again. 

They start to leave the court house, Talia’s hand still in his, Bane behind them both and Barsad following behind. John takes one last look at Bruce as they walk away. He says three words that he hopes will say all that needs to be said, that will make him understand why this is the only thing that John could choose. 

 

“Please, don’t follow.”

*^*^*^*^*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I totally thought of ending the story here but I thought it would hurt too much so there will be more.


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So long chapter again but not as long as last time. I will try to have more soon.

*^*^*^*^*

Barsad keeps a steady hand on his gun, ready for any interference that may come. Most of the freed police are upfront of the courthouse still, fighting mostly Blackgate inmates and a few of those they recruited specifically for this mission, men they can afford to lose. He stays in the back as they make their way through the streets. It will not be long till they are able to get to the tunnels, to make their way to the transportation that waits. 

So far there is no sign of Wayne. When they had first left the courthouse, he had hung back waited till John and Talia were further ahead before speaking with Bane. He looked over at his brother, kept his voice quiet so that he would not be overheard.

“I can go back.” 

Bane knew what Barsad was offering. He would go and kill Wayne, make sure the man cannot interfere with John leaving this city. Bane had taken a moment, thought about it as they continued to move . His eyes were focused on John and Talia, on the way Talia held John’s hand tightly, seemed to try to keep his attention focused on her, keeping him from looking back. John’s body was tense, worry evident in the way he moved how his eyes keep glancing at the trigger in Talia’s hand. 

“It is not needed. If Wayne is foolish enough to follow, he deserves his fate.” 

Barsad heard what his brother did not say out loud, how this is a test for Wayne in a way, to see if he will respect John’s choice. He will stand by Bane’s decision and he does not go back to finish Wayne. 

 

They work their way through Gotham, maneuvering so they are not near any of the trucks’ routes. They do not want John to come near them, be close to any of the police. There is always the possibility of something making him doubt his choice. Barsad still has more of the sedative in his pocket, if Talia commands it, John will still leave Gotham no matter what. 

They are at their destination, just a few more moments and they will leave Gotham. Most of the men have gone ahead, started loading into the vehicles kept at this exit. There are no outsiders blocking this one, it had always been watched by them. It does not take long for most of the men to be loaded up and it is only four of them still not ready to leave. 

John has let go of Talia’s hand, has moved just a little bit away from her. He looks towards Gotham. The expression on his face is one of worry, of doubt. 

“ This is it. We leave but Gotham may still blow up if people can’t get to the bomb in time. How do I know that you haven’t made it more difficult than you said? Is there even a chance for it to be reconnected?”

He is trying to keep his voice steady but Barsad can hear the doubt in it, the concern that this is not the right choice. Barsad knows that Talia had the codes to flood the chamber but she did not use them, did not deem it needed. He watches as Talia makes her way to John, stands beside him. Bane moves to them and Barsad stays where he is, watching for any who might interfere.

“There was a time you would have trusted my word without any doubts.”

There is sadness in her voice that most would not hear but Barsad knows her well, can hear her mourning for all that has been lost in a way. As she speaks, she takes his hand, puts the trigger in it. He looks a little shocked but does not move away from her. 

“ I will make no other move to ensure that the bomb goes off .Gotham’s fate is in its hands. I cannot promise it will live but it will have more of a chance than it deserves. ” 

John seems reassured by her words, though he still seems hesitant. He stares towards Gotham for just a moment longer, almost frozen. Bane places a gentle hand upon the back of his neck, the act making John look towards Bane, towards Talia instead of the city.

“ You made your choice and now it is time to come with us.”

Bane’s words receive a small nod from John and he lets Talia take his hand, lead him to one of the vehicles. The three of them move steadily and Barsad watches them, hears the soft reassurances that Talia gives him, the way Bane lets go of his neck but his fingers linger just a moment. His brother and sister look more whole with him there and Barsad knows that there may not be as much of a need for them to keep him close now. He knows that he will have to start distancing himself, step aside so that John can take the place that was denied him so long, and now seems like the moment to start. It will be strange to make this journey not by their side but he will still be one of their men. That will have to be enough. He starts to go to another vehicle after John and Talia enter the one nearest. There is room in the other vehicles, a driver already and so he knows that it will just be Bane with them. It will give them a chance to talk, give Barsad time to collect his thoughts. He does not expect Bane to grab his arm, stop him from moving. Bane’s eyes look into his when he talks. 

“You will ride with us.”

Bane says this, not as a command but more as a statement. Barsad should move from Bane’s hold but he does not. He looks away from Bane before he speaks instead. 

“ He does not know me, may only think of me as the man who drugged him once his memories return fully. I do not wish to put any more tension in this situation.”

Bane lets go of his arm and Barsad thinks for a moment that this will be the end of the discussion. Instead, Bane takes his chin, tilts it so he can have a good look at his face.

“He will know you in time and we wish you to know him, to be his just as you are ours. Come.”

The words are a reassurance, mean more than almost anything. There is relief that he will not have to step aside. Bane lets go of his chin and he follows him into the vehicle, takes his place next to Bane. 

*^*^*^*^*  
They are out of Gotham now, have been for many hours and it still weighs on John’s mind. He made his choice but he is still wishes he could be there, could know what is happening. 

The whole journey in the trucks through one of the tunnels, he had held the trigger tightly in his hands, and had only talked a little, answering questions and asking few of his own.   
He wondered if they were planning to stay just outside of Gotham to see what would happen. When they stopped, there was a plane waiting and John realized that they would be going far from Gotham and it may be a while before he can find any information out.

They settle into the plane, Talia and Bane close beside him as they had been in the truck and their second nearby. He is next to a window and looking out when it takes off and for a few moments nothing is said. He is startled out of his quiet thinking when Talia’s fingers brush his, the ones still clutching the trigger. He looks to her.

“You do not have to hold that anymore. We are out of range now. Whatever happens to the city now will be its own doing.”

He lets go of the trigger, placing it in his lap so that he can still see it. Talia takes his hand. She almost seems afraid to let go of him for longer than a few minutes. 

“Where are we going ? What happens now?” 

“We are going to the mountains. It may help with your memories.” 

Bane gives him the answer and John is once again struck by how different he sounds when he speaks to him than how he appeared when taking over Gotham.

“How did I forget everything in the first place?”

It is a question he has wondered about for a long time and some of the things that were said have made him wonder even more. Talia tightens her hold just a bit and Bane glances over at Barsad, gives him a nod before the man turns to John. He knows that this man knew him from before and he remembers how horribly familiar the act of him drugging him had felt. 

“The chemicals were made to make you susceptible to suggestion, blur your memories a bit. You were given them for months and the dosages became heavier and more frequent right before Wayne made his move against the League. You may have suffered injuries as well that blocked off those memories.”

His voice is steady as he explains this. John needs to know more, feels like he only has little pieces of the puzzle that is his life. 

“You gave me the drugs.” 

John knows there is a bit of anger in his voice but he doesn’t care. 

“Only because I had to. I tried to dilute the doses, tried to make sure you could keep as much as yourself as possible. Perhaps, one day you will forgive me for what I had to do.” 

The man’s voice has just a hint of regret to it and John believes him. He listens as they explain how Barsad was their inside man, about how Ra’s had taken him before excommunicating Bane, about how hard they tried to get him back. He wants to ask about Bruce but he can’t bring himself to do so. Everything still seems so jumbled to John right now and he just sort of wants

“There will be much to discuss but we do not have to do so till you are ready. It may be best if you rest now.”

Bane seems to know that John needs a break from all this talk of his past. The rest of the plane ride is spent in relative quiet. John is not sure how many hours they are in the air but he feels so very far away from Gotham when they land. 

They go to a village and John knows that he has been here before, the buildings seeming familiar. They take a truck for a bit of the way until the path becomes narrower. They get out and Talia explains that they will climb the rest of the way. John expresses some doubt about how well that will go and Talia calmly tells him that they have done it before. 

“Your legs were much shorter then and you still made it up. I am certain you can do it again and you may not trip as much this time.”

There is teasing in her voice, as if this was a joke they had. John wishes he could remember it. They start the climb. 

John doesn’t remember climbing this before yet but it seems his muscles do. It is not as rough as he thought it would be and the view is beautiful. Talia climbs as gracefully as she does everything else, her movements smooth. Bane walks slightly behind them as if to make sure if either lose their footing he will be there to catch their fall.

They take a small break and John notices a blue flower. He picks it up, careful not to breathe in any of its dust, somehow knowing that it is more dangerous than it looks. Barsad comes beside him, looks over the flower. 

“It is strange how something so beautiful can cause even the strongest of men to become crippled by their fears.” 

Barsad says this more to himself than to John but it triggers a memory. His fingers tighten around the flower as he remembers asking Bruce what it made him see, hearing him talk about falling into the cave. It is a shock as the memory comes to the surface confirming that Bruce had met him before everything. He drops the flower after a moment.

“Did it trigger a memory? They may start surfacing faster as things seem more familiar”, Barsad asks .

John nods his head but says nothing. Bane comes over to where they are standing.

“It is time to finish so we do not lose the light. Are you all right to continue?”

“I’m fine. Let’s go. It’s cold out here.” 

Bane chuckles slightly at that and they start the last part of the climb. John can see the compound in the distance. The sun has started to go down but he can still see clearly for the most par as they near it. There is something that catches his eye and he makes his way over to it. 

It is a grave. The dirt looks like it may have been dug up at some point after it had been dug the first time. The headstone has no name or dates on it, just a drawing of a red bird, a robin. It makes his throat feel tight. 

“It is yours.” 

Bane says this simply as he and Talia approach. John bends down next to it, touches the drawing with his fingers. Talia bends down and does the same, speaking to him softly as her fingers trace over his.

“I had it dug up after someone said something about Wayne hiding you. We kept it here to remind ourselves of you, to remind us of how you were taken from us.”

It is strange seeing your own grave. He doesn’t want to look at it anymore. John rises from the ground, helps Talia up. 

“It can be torn down soon if you desire.” 

Bane says this as they make their way to the compound. John nods. The climb has sapped most of his energy and has made him chilled to the bone. He has more questions about the grave, about how the compound burnt, but they will wait until the next day, for now he just wants rest and a few moments to collect his thoughts.

 

*^*^*^*^*  
It is good being able to spend time with John now without having to wear her mask. She had let things slip through around him, more than she should, but now away from Gotham, away from Wayne, she can be herself around him. They can get to know each other truly again, talk about the time spent apart. 

It has only been a week since John had to make his choice. She knows he thinks about it, that he is still conflicted by going with them, and that hurts a bit. It will take time for all the hurt he feels about her lying to him, about all that happened in Gotham, to lessen. Bane reassures her that he had never been able to stay mad at her for long but she knows that much has changed since they were children. For now, they focus on John recovering all the memories he has lost and then they will plan their future.

Talia had been unsure about bringing him here but there are so many memories tied to this place, good and bad that it would surely bring them to the surface. The old compound had burnt but the one that stands now was built on its ruins, has much the same layout and Talia knows that its history can still be seen. John is given free reign of it but he is rarely out of sight of Bane, Barsad or herself. He sleeps with them in their chamber, Barsad had offered to sleep somewhere else but Talia saw no reason for him to. John would need time to get to know their devoted and it would do no good for Barsad to distance himself.   
The first night John had insisted on sleeping in separate bedding away from them. They allowed it but in the middle of the night, she had climbed into his bed and after a few moments wrapped his arms around her. The next night he had pushed the bedding closer but still started out away from them. It will just take time for him to get used to them again.

He is starting to recover more memories, from the time he spent with them and from the time her father kept him from them. He asks questions and they ask him some as well. She would walk with him; ask him about the places they would go, certain events that should stand out.

“This was your room before Bane was kicked out.” 

He asks this as they stand in an empty room. It is just the two of them. She tells him yes. It has been a while since she has stood in this room. They had chosen a different chamber to sleep in once everything was rebuilt. 

“It was his room, too.”

She does not have to ask who he is talking about. Barsad had told them how her father gave this room to Wayne, how it had raised her ire, had made her feel that he thought her replaceable. John is starting to remember his time with Wayne but he knows that it is still a touchy subject for her. 

John is still looking around. Bane and Barsad should be back soon with news about Gotham’s fate. She knows he thinks about it still, knows that by now if the bomb was not stopped, it went off. It will be something they will know for sure soon. 

“He would call me John when we were alone. Everyone else called me Robin once you were gone.” 

John does this sometimes, speaks the things he starts to remember out loud, as if they can’t disappear again that way. They stay just a few moments long and then they leave this room, go outside for a bit. It is not long till Bane and Barsad are back. It only takes a few moments for them to be back inside, to take out the newspapers and messages they went to get. 

“So what happened?”

John’s voice has just a bit of an edge to it, there is desperation in his eyes and Talia is not sure if it would be better for the bomb to have gone off or not. She does not want him feeling guilty but she also does not want him to have somewhere he thinks he should return to. Bane looks to her, a question in his eyes about if she wants John to know about this yet. She gives just the slightest nod. It will do no good to keep things from him now.

“It still stands.”

There is no emotion in Bane’s voice, just the simple stating of a fact. John seems so very relieved, a lot of his tension easing away, he sits down, starts listening as Barsad speaks about what they have heard about the reconstruction, of how the bomb was reconnected but damaged and the chamber flooded.

Talia is unsure how she feels about Gotham’s continued existence, there is still so much wrong with it but at least John will not feel as much guilt about his choice now. Bane has come to her, hands her some paper.

“There is more to tell him but I wanted you to know first.”

She looks down at what he has given her , an article about the dead and missing, about how Batman is considered perished from flooding the chamber, how Bruce Wayne has not been found and a funeral would be held soon. There is also a note about his will, about how it has been found that John is mentioned in it. 

She and Bane share a look, both knowing that this may hurt him but feeling relived if this is true, to know Wayne can not interfere any more. It is only a few moments until John is asking another question, one she knows that he would.

“What of Bruce?”

Talia comes to him, gives him the paper. She can see his eyes scan over it, can see the exact moment when he realizes what has been believed to be Bruce’s fate. She stands near him, puts her hand on his shoulder. She knows that he is blaming himself but there is no reason that he should. She tells him 

“He made his choice just as you did. ”

John tenses up, shrugs her hand off. He is up, moving quickly towards the door. She tries to stop him, grabs his arm. There is pain in his eyes, unshed tears starting to form in them, and she hates seeing that look on his face and hates it more because it is caused by Wayne. She wants to lash out, to tell him that Wayne doesn’t deserve his tears but she can not bring herself to say it yet.

“John”, she says his name softly and he shakes his head at her, tries to get out of her hold. 

“I just need to not be in this room right now. Please, just let me be alone for a bit.”

She lets go of his arm and he strides out of the room. She wants to follow him but Bane stops her, wraps his arms around her.

“I will find him after a few moments.’ 

She nods, knows to trust him. She can only hope that Wayne’s death does not break her little bird in a way she can not mend. 

*^*^*^*^*


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm hopping to keep up this almost weekly update thing but work starts soon so I might get distracted a bit. Enjoy.

*^*^*^*^*

The time that has passed since first finding out about Gotham has been rough. Bane has always known there would be an adjustment period .It is difficult relearning each other, to see traces of the boy they knew but to still know there have been many changes for all of them. There had been a shift as John stays with them, more memories coming to the surface, their little bird becoming more familiar to them but still different. Wayne’s death has put a strain on the processes, has made John a little more quiet, a bit sullen and more likely to lash out at or avoid them. 

Today, they have not seen John. He had awakened before them, left the room. It is only the fact that they would be alerted if he left the mountain that calmed Talia when she saw he was not in his bedding. He has been given free reign of the compound with the understanding that he is not to leave. They do not want to keep him prisoner here as he had been before but they do not want to risk him disappearing again. They know he has been around the compound, others having seen him but it is now nearing sundown and they have not spoken with him at all. Bane has gone outside to see if their little bird can be found, coaxed to eat a meal with them. 

The path to the lake is one Bane has traveled down many times. It is a place that they would often visit when John and Talia were younger, not just for the training that they all had to do but for other reasons as well, just to spend time with each other . It is usually quiet and Bane is certain that the quiet is what John may be seeking at this time.

He nears the end of the path and can see John sitting just a little bit away from the water, looking out at it. He walks quietly but does not mask his steps too much. The air is always cool up and winter has not quiet ended yet and Bane wonders how long he has been out here, if he will get sick from it. As he nears John does not say anything, does not turn towards him or make a move to leave. Bane stops just a few feet behind him and waits for John to react. The next few moments pass quietly but soon John turns towards Bane, gives just the slightest nod to him before facing the water again. Bane moves forward, sits down next to him, close enough to touch if John should wish it.   
Bane waits just a moment longer before breaking the silence.

“We have not seen you today.”

It is a simple statement, Bane keeping his voice clam not putting any worry in his tone. John takes a moment before answering, turning to Bane as he does so and it is nice seeing more recognition in his eyes now. 

“I just needed to be alone today.” 

John’s cheeks are red from the cold but his eyes look dry, no sign of tears, but there is sorrow in his voice. It is slight but Bane can still hear it. It takes Bane just a moment to think of today’s date, to remember the article about Wayne, the funeral that would be too risky for John to attend.

“You mourn him.”

John says nothing, his glance away is enough of an answer. Wayne is something they do not speak of very much. Barsad has spoken with him about the man, John has told Talia of what he has started to remember about Wayne before Gotham, but to Bane John does not speak of Wayne or mention him. 

“He is not worth your pain.”

Bane knows the words are harsh but they are the truth. Even now, Wayne is still causing them pain. His hands tighten where he has them at his sides, fists clenching in irritation. John notices it, glances down at Bane’s fists but he does not flinch. He has remembered enough that he is not scared of Bane, knows he will not be harmed. He touches his right fist, his fingers settling on Bane’s knuckles, the touch soothing. John has been hesitant to touch since coming with them and this gesture eases Bane, lets him know that much of their John Bird is coming back. 

“I know that you hate him but I cared for him and that is something that is not easy to let go of.”

There is just a bit of irritation in John’s voice and he is still looking away. His fingers leave his knuckles and Bane can not help but say more.

“Even now when you know what he has done to you, you still care.”

“He’s not the only one who lied, who did things that hurt me.”

There is hurt in his voice once again, the meaning of his words clear.

“ He had his reasons just like you only now I will never be able to know what they were.” 

This is really what is upsetting him so much. Their little bird has never dealt well with questions he can’t know the answers to. There is nothing Bane can say, no comfort he can give and so he stays silent, waiting for John to do or say something. It is quiet, no others around and the light is starting to fade. It could almost be peaceful. A few moments pass and then John is looking to him, his eyes shining with a grim curiosity. 

“I want to know what happened before the occupation, what you did to him.”

This is something Bane has not told him but he will not deny him the truth after all that has happened. Bane tells him of the fight with Wayne, of what came before it, of sparing his life but breaking his back, of putting him in the pit. He does not spare details, their little bird is strong enough to hear it all. John listens, asking questions at times. He does not hide his emotions right now, Bane can see them all flicker across his face as he speaks, all the anger, confusion, fear, and understanding. Once John seems satisfied that Bane has told him all there is, the sun is almost completely gone. There is a question Bane wants answered after his story is done, a thought that has not gone away no matter how much he pushes it to the back of his mind and now seems the time to ask him. 

“ In the pit, Wayne said you wanted to go back to Gotham. Do you remember that?”

Bane waits as John takes a moment to think and Bane dreads the answer in a way.

“Yes. I told him if I couldn’t find you guys, I would want to go to Gotham with him. I didn’t want to be alone again.”

The answer gives Bane both a breath of relief and a curl in his stomach of jealousy. It is still hard accepting that John cared for Wayne back then, perhaps almost as much as he did them. He does not dwell on it, Wayne is gone and John with them again. He gives assurance.

“You will not be alone again.”

“I know. Talia doesn’t want us separated again.”

The statement is spoken with very little emotion, no hint to what John thinks about it. It is hard for Bane to read John sometimes now. He is guarded in a way he wasn’t when he was younger. John closes his eyes for just a moment, as if going somewhere else for just a few seconds, before turning to Bane and speaking once again. 

“We should head back, Talia will fret if I miss dinner.” 

With this John gets up and Bane does as well. There is much that still needs to be decided, to be worked through but right now evening is upon them and it is time to return to the compound. John is quiet on the way back but he allows Bane to walk close beside him, to place an arm around him to keep him warm. 

*^*^*^*^*  
His memories have returned mostly but they still feel hazy , almost like they happened to someone else, are a part of a different life. John supposes in a way they are. It is a life he may never get back completely but at least he does not have the uncertainty of what had happened now. He just has to focus on adjusting to what his life is now.

A few weeks have passed since John chose to go with them and he is starting to adjust, to train again. The training is familiar, the movements coming to him fairly quickly. It is still tiring getting back into the habit. Soon, he is sparing against others. Talia still beats him most of the time they spar, she was always so much faster than him and still seems to be. John gets excited when he can catch her off guard, it is almost a game between the two of them. 

He enjoys her company, even with all the hurt he had due to the occupation. She had kept so much from him and it is difficult dealing with that, with the fact he had no idea that she was keeping anything from him. He hadn’t realized it with Bruce either and the whole thing makes him doubt his ability to read people. John knows that nothing is being kept from him now, that they don’t want him to doubt his choice but he will never have the full picture of what happened because Bruce is gone.

It is very different being here than Gotham, the routine not the one John is used to. It is so removed from the rest of the world. The League has different ways of dealing with things and Talia tries to explain it all to him. Some of it he had heard long ago, after all Ra’s was training him just as he was Talia but it is still a lot to take in and is so different than the police. John was raised with this but has been away from it for so long that he is still not sure if the League’s ways are the best.

“I am still not sure if terrorism is the best way to go about changing the world.” 

John says this when Talia has her head on his shoulder, her hair tickling his neck. It is a rare moment of just him and Talia in the bed room, Bane and Barsad somewhere else for the day. They are discussing various things in private, papers strewn across the bedding as they lay close together.

“It was the League’s way for centuries, one Father embraced whole heartedly, but it is not the only one the League employs. The League is ours now and we will shape it as we see fit.”

He moves his shoulder slightly when she says this, making her raise her head to look at him. This is not the first time she has hinted at this, has made it known she expects him to lead with her but the idea of changing how the League goes about things has not been as established. 

“Why didn’t you make changes before? Why did you stick with his ways for Gotham?’

She looks at him, her eyes staring into his as she takes a moment before answering. 

“It was his last mission, I felt I should honor him and I wanted my revenge. Gotham’s system is so flawed that I thought it might be better to wipe it out completely.”

It is an honest answer. There is a lot of her father in her, John knows this, knows she can be harsh if she needs to but there is more to her than that, than her cruelty. It is hard to approve of what they did but he can understand, is just glad that Gotham has a chance still.

“ You are back with us and now we have a new beginning, a chance to make the League ours. You know that many of the systems of the world are broken and have to be worked around. We will be able to do so much, you will see.” 

Her words are reassuring, her hand touches his face, fingers tracing his lips. He does understand, knows how broken things can be. He gives her a small smile, a slight nod of the head. It will take time to figure everything out but he wants to. They discuss things a little more, go over some of the information they have. Soon the papers are put away and Talia lays her hand on his thigh. She rubs it gently for just a moment and then kisses him, lets him decide if it will become more. 

He has been getting more physical with her again, not quite to the point they were at during the Occupation but he doesn’t feel the need to avoid touching her. He has also started accepting small touches from Bane and Barsad as well. He sleeps in bed with her now , with all of them, and has quickly figured out Barsad is more than their second. The man sleeping in bed with them was a bit of a tip off. 

They kiss and touch for a few minutes until they hear the door to the room opening. John can’t help but blush just a bit as Barsad and Bane enter. There is a smirk on Barsad’s face and the twinkle in Bane’s eyes tells John that they have seen at least part of the kissing.

“You are back early.”

There is just the slightest hint of playful irritation in Talia’s voice. Bane and Barsad make apologies that don’t really sound like such and the rest of the evening is spent discussing the happenings of the League. 

John starts to get more comfortable as the days go by. It is nice being around Bane and Talia again, it starts to feel like home. He is getting to know Barsad, is starting to feel less awkward around him, knows that his memories from before were not the whole story. He misses Gotham in a way but does not mention it to them. He still feels a loss, doesn’t quite feel completely whole but maybe that will come in time. 

Something happens that disturbs the calm John finds himself in. 

He is with Barsad when the commotion first starts. There are not as many people around lately, some have gone to other places to train or to different posts but is obvious that something is happening when one of the other men comes up to them, says something about a fire in one of the far corners of the compound. Most are evacuating and Barsad starts to make his way to it, to see what has caused and John moves deeper into the complex to find Talia. It is far enough away that it shouldn’t cause too much problems this deep in but it may spread. 

Whoever lit it must have done so as a distraction more than anything else and John thinks about this as he walks through the halls. The question is why a distraction is needed and John thinks that maybe only one person is involved with whatever is happening. He is keeping aware of his surrounding and so it is not much of a surprise when he feels another person near him, can hear just the softest sound of a breath behind him. When the hand starts to touch his shoulder, John reacts without much thought.

His movements are quick and it is nothing to take the hand off of him, to elbow the body behind him. Whoever it is moves just as quickly but seems more to block John’s blows than landing any of their own. He doesn’t really even see who he is fighting with, just the black of their cloths, a bit of fabric that moves around them. Their movements seem familiar and it makes him hesitate just a moment. His arm is grabbed , pinned to his chest and his body dragged closer to the other’s. This has all happened in moments and John know that others are coming and he gets ready to fight out of the hold when words are spoken that make him stop.

“John, I am not here to hurt you.”

It is not so much the promise that stills him for just a moment as it is the voice. It is a voice he had thought he would never hear again and it is the voice that makes him twist his body around not to escape the hold but to see who is holding him. 

The costume is so very familiar, Batman standing front of him and it makes John’s breath catch, makes his heart pick up. The eyes looking at him through the mask are unmistakable but John wants to see his face fully. His hand reaches up and it is not stopped from pulling the cowl back. 

“You died.” John breathes it out, so many emotions starting to swirl inside of him at the face in front of him, one that looks unsure but determined all at once. 

Bruce Wayne is standing in front of him, alive and well and John has no idea what will happen now.   
*^*^*^*^*


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Been super busy but hopefully will be able to start updating more soon. Hope you enjoy.

*^*^*^*^*  
The time after John had made his choice had been one of the most difficult Bruce had ever faced. It hurt to watch him walk away with them, not knowing if Talia would keep her word. He had wanted to follow but John’s words had stopped him, made him realize that John had not had a choice really, that he was counting on Bruce to make sure Gotham would survive. It did and now as it is rebuilding itself, Bruce needs to help John, bring him back home. 

This is his only chance to get John away from them. He couldn’t risk waiting too long, wait for them to move from here, risk losing John to their influence completely. He knows what had happened to John here before and he does not want it to happen again.

Bruce had moved through the compound, thankful the layout was familiar and that he had been able to observe things for a while without being noticed and once John was alone , he had made his move. John had fought him, his movements trained and dangerous, so different in a way than he had been in Gotham. It took some time to subdue him a bit, to speak to him. There is realization in John’s eyes as he looks at Bruce fully for the first time and then pulls the cowl back. His face shows a bit of relief, some wonder at Bruce being alive and it gives him hope that John is not lost to him yet. 

“You died.”

There is just the slightest shake to John’s voice and his free hand touches Bruce’s face as if he needs to touch it to believe what he is seeing. He feels exposed right now, strange without his cowl on but he knows that John needs to know that it is him. His fingers are warm and Bruce allows himself just a second to enjoy the touch before he grabs John’s hand and starts to pull him forward, to move him. 

“They told me you died, I saw the paper. They wouldn’t lie, not about that, not now.”

His words are said in a rush, all confusion and Bruce takes advantage of how he has stopped fighting to start moving him towards an exit. His hands tighten around John’s arm, the one with the needle marks from before and he wonders briefly if there are fresh ones upon him now. Bruce did not forget that it was Barsad who made the drugs from before, administered them and it is a skill he could be using now. He will worry about that once he had John safe from here, for now he speaks as he continues moving him away from the center of the compound. 

“I needed the world to think I was gone. I will explain when I can, when we are away from here.”

He keeps his hold on John, almost dragging him. The fire will only distract everyone for so long. There is an opening nearby that will take them outside. It was mostly the League he needed to think he was dead, to see what they would do, if his funeral would draw them out, draw John back to Gotham. There was no sign of them near Gotham, no move made against the city. Bruce knew that it would only be a matter of time before they would do something, he was certain that they would not leave things alone. Talia had spent years planning Gotham’s fall, time getting closer to both himself and John to get to her goal and Bruce has seen Bane’s cruelty firsthand, his back still bares marks from it. There had been a possessiveness in both of their voices when they spoke of John, one that spoke of what they could do to keep John with them, to make him take what they think is his place. He had failed John once by leaving him with the wrong person for too long, he will not do so again.

Bruce has gotten them to a door, pushes it and gets ready to drag John through. There are voices coming from a bit away, people looking for them. John starts to struggle a bit in his arms, just enough that Bruce starts to think of the sedative he brought with him, the one he had hoped would not be needed. He doesn’t let go, strengthens his grip and hopes that he is still strong enough to overpower John if needed.

“You have to let go, I don’t know what will happen if you are seen.” 

John says this as he continues to try to get out of Bruce’s grip. He lets go of John with one of his hands as he speaks, tries to keep John moving by pulling harder with the hand that still holds on. 

“John, you are coming with me. You don’t have to stay here.”

His voice is firm as he speaks, still pulling John forward, through the door. He wants John to have this chance, to know that he doesn’t have to stick with the promise he made under duress. There is still a chance John may try to stay and it is that thought that has Bruce reach into his suit with his free hand and grip the sedative. John finally yanks free from him, doesn’t move away but he shakes his head. 

“It is too much of a risk for me to go with you. Just get out of here before they find you.”

John sounds desperate, trying to get Bruce to leave before the others show. John still cares for him and it makes Bruce even more desperate to take him from here. He came all this way and he is not leaving John behind. John’s attention is divided between Bruce and looking back to the compound, trying to see if anyone is coming. Bruce takes the distraction, grabs John’s arm again, and pulls him towards his body. They are so close now, Bruce can feel John breathe.

“Come with me.”

Bruce whispers it to him, holds him close to his chest with one arm wrapped around him. John reacts to how close their bodies are, leaning his face up towards Bruce’s own, his mouth so close. 

“You don’t understand. I just..” 

John starts to speak but Bruce cuts his words off, crushes their mouths together. John leans into the kiss and Bruce knows that it is cruel to use this as a distraction but he has no other choice than to move the needle towards John’s arm, plunging it in quickly. John feels the jab, starts to move away from it. Bruce tries to inject most of it in but John wrestles in his hold, the struggle causing the needle to come out. He got some of it but not a full dose so it will not be as effective, will not work as quickly. John is trying to fight back but Bruce holds onto him with all he has, waits for him to weaken. Just a few more moments and he will be able to take John from here.

“Let him go.”

The voice cuts through the air and Bruce tightens his hold, turns to see Talia and Barsad coming out of the compound, running towards them. There may not be time now but Bruce will not go down without a fight.  
*^*^*^*^*  
The news of the fire had reached Talia and she knew that whoever set it would have had a purpose for such. Not many would attack the home of the League so directly. They would have to be foolish or brave to do so, perhaps a bit of both, or consider the task worth the risk. A knot of dread started to settle in her gut at the thought of just who would risk this. She had barked out orders to the men with her and then had started working her way through the compound. 

She knew she would not find Bane quickly as he had been outside shortly before but last she knew Barsad and John were still inside and so she searched for them, keeping her calm. Everything had been going so well the last few days, John finally settling in, their plans to reform the League being shaped, and now something is happening that they had not planned for. Talia finds Barsad directing men to the fire but he is alone. 

“Where is John?” 

Her voice does not shake but her heart picks up in rhythm just a tiny bit when Barsad looks towards her and answers.

“He went to find you. Come , the fire will be under control shortly, we can find him.”

He guides her to the path that John had started to take. They talk quietly about what is happening as they look for him. They see just a glimpse of him being dragged through a door by a figure in black. Talia’s breath catches in her throat as there is only one person who it could be. 

Bruce Wayne is alive. 

They race outside just in time to see a kiss, to see Wayne plunge the needle into John. Her bird struggles in Wayne’s arms and she is glad to see it. Talia orders Wayne to let go of John, it is an order that is ignored. 

“I cannot let you take him again, Mr. Wayne.” 

Barsad’s voice is firm as he runs with her, making their way to Wayne. John is starting to feel the effects of whatever Wayne gave him, his struggles are less now and his eyes are losing their focus but he is still awake. 

“I cannot let him be kept prisoner here.” 

Wayne’s words are said fiercely, his arms wrapped around John. Talia keeps moving towards them, certain Wayne will not hurt him but wanting to get John away from him. She looks a little past them and can see Bane coming up the path to them. It fills her with relief but she does not let it show on her face. 

“This is his home. He is not a prisoner here and I insist that you let him go. ”

Talia stands just a few feet away, ready to fight Wayne if she must, but her concern is John. Wayne has loosened his hold just slightly but he still does not let go. John slurs some words out, they are mumbled as he is starting to feel the full effects but she can make out Bruce, hurt, don’t. Talia is unsure if it is meant for her or Wayne to hear. Barsad has moved closer as well, ready to pull John away when needed.

“It is time for you to walk away. If you leave now, no harm will come to you. We will not make a move against you or your city again but you must leave John here, with his family. He made his choice.” 

She makes sure her voice carries so that Bane will hear it as well, will know that if Wayne walks away now, he is not to be hurt. This is Wayne’s chance to walk away, to let go of someone who can’t be only his. She will not give up her John bird now that he is starting to be hers fully again but she can show mercy for his sake. 

“You forced his choice.”

Wayne’s voice is harsh, accusing, and Talia knows that it is the truth but not all of it. She knows that he is not going to walk away from this. John is starting to slump in his arms and Wayne shifts his weight, starts to reposition John so that he can be carried. It is the moment to act. Talia lunges forward grabbing onto John’s hands. She pulls on them to get him out of Wayne’s arms just as Barsad moves to Wayne to tackle him. There is a bit of a scuffle that Talia does not see focusing on sitting down on the ground with John, positioning them so they are out of the way. 

She looks up as Bane makes his presence known, steps towards Wayne as Barsad moves away towards them. He looks to her, a question in his eyes that she answers with a nod. She shifts John so she can look him over while still being able to watch the conformation. She had not seen Wayne broken the first time but she may see it now.

*^*^*^*^*  
Bane had made his way on the path, seen John with a figure that rumor had as a ghost and watched as Talia gave Wayne a warning. He waited till John was out of Wayne’s arms, safe again in Talia and Barsad on his way to them. He will help if it is needed but for now Bane needs to fight Wayne on his own. 

“You should not have come here.”

Bane keeps his words simple as he makes his way to Wayne, as he prepares to fight against this man who will not leave them be. Talia had nodded, gave her approval for any measure he may take. Wayne had a chance of mercy but did not take it. 

This feels familiar, standing off against each other once again but it is very different than that night in the tunnel. Wayne’s cowl is off and he does not make a move to put it back on. There is anger in his face, a steel determination that hadn’t been there in the tunnels. Wayne knows this may be his last fight and he is determined to not lose but so is Bane. Wayne is threatening the new life they are building and Bane can not allow him to interfere anymore. 

Bane makes the first move, a fist into Wayne’s side to knock the wind out of him. Wayne dodges but pushes his body forward, rams himself into Bane. There is just the slightest crack heard and Bane knows that a few of his ribs will need to be looked at later. Wayne has broken the first bone but Bane will break the last. 

This fight is more of a challenge than the one in the tunnels. They are both not only fighting to win but to make the other suffer. There is a rage in both their actions, no punch is pulled, every hit countered with another. Bane focuses on Wayne’s knees and back, raining blows upon them so that the man will soon not be able to stand. Wayne focuses on Bane’s ribs and then his mask. He blocks the face hits as much as possible and so Wayne focuses on knocking the air out of him, making it difficult for him to breathe in the chemicals he needs. 

They are both aware of the figures nearby, Talia with John as he seems to fade in and out, and Barsad standing at the ready. They both take glances from time to time.It will be difficult for Wayne to overpower all of them and he knows it but it does not stop his fight. His punch once again makes its way towards Bane’s face but as he blocks it, the path of it changes. Wayne hits the straps on the back, loosening them instead of attacking the tubes. The mask shifts and the chemicals can not be breathed in as readily. There is pain , different kinds that bleed into each other, the old mixing with what has been inflicted right now. 

Wayne does not let up, pushes his advantage. Bane does not let up either, pushes the pain as far back in his mind as he can. He knows that Barsad is watching, that it will only take a few moments for his brother to enter the fray. He catches his eyes and soon Wayne is fending off both of them. Bane takes a precious moment to readjust his mask before helping Barsad to fight Wayne again. Wayne does not let up, does not let the numbers affect him. It seems losing their little bird has given him a fire again but it does not matter. He would try to take John from them, had taken him before, and no matter how much it may pain John, Bane would not allow Wayne to walk away this time. 

It is a few precious moments of fighting, of tiring Wayne to get him down on the ground, pinned beneath Bane’s boot. All it will take is just a press against his throat and Wayne will never breathe again. 

“You should have stayed a ghost. It will be corrected now.”

It is all the warning he is giving Wayne. This will hurt John, Bane is certain of it, but he steels himself. He can face their little bird’s anger if it means he will still be with them. Bane takes a moment to brace himself, readies for the blow he will give, when some words reach his ears. 

“Don’t. Please don’t.”

They are gasped out, slightly slurred but full of faith that they will be obeyed. They are enough to spare Wayne for the moment. 

*^*^*^*^*


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is so long. I am glad people are still sticking with it. Here is some more and I hope you enjoy.

*^*^*^*^*  
The compound still stands ,the fire only taking out a little bit of the building. They do not even have to evacuate for the night and there was no loss of life. Wayne had done much more damage the first time he had set it on fire but Barsad knows that damage wasn’t his intent this time. Taking John away from here was his mission and he had failed.

Wayne’s appearance here has been a complication, something perhaps they should have planned for. There had been news of his death but no real proof. John had mourned and so there had been no reason to look into Wayne’s death. Talia and Bane had wanted to move on, to help John to move on and so Gotham and Wayne was considered a part of the past. Barsad had not thought of Wayne returning even though he knows how easy it is to fake a death. The grave that used to sit in front of the League is proof of that. 

It had been a foolish thing, a great risk, for Wayne to come here as he did, to attempt to take John. Barsad wonders why he came, why he is so interested in John now after abandoning him in Gotham before. He had watched him fight Bane once again, noticed the spirit that seems to be relit in him. Barsad had intervened when needed, had helped take Wayne down. John’s words had caused him to be spared but there is still an issue of what to do with him. 

Talia and John had come forward at his words, at his plea for Wayne to live. He is still struggling with whatever he was dosed with and Talia holds him close, her hands steadying him. Barsad sees their approach out of the corner of his eyes but keeps his focus on Wayne struggling under Bane’s foot. Bane is not looking at Wayne, instead turns and looks at Talia and John.

“Don’t kill him. I can’t watch that, not after everything.” 

John’s voice is fairly steady, care taken to slow down his words so that they can all hear them. Talia steps slightly in front of him, as if trying to block him from Wayne’s view. Everyone is quiet for this moment, even Wayne who is still trying to work his way out from Bane does not speak. His brother could still cut off Wayne’s air easily , could kill him quickly, and they all wait to see if he will or if John’s wish will be honored. 

Barsad takes this moment to think about him, to consider who John is and how he fits in this world. There is fire in him, Barsad has seen it as he has gotten to know him. Fire that is so much like Talia’s but there is a softness to John. He had been an innocent when Talia had found him, Barsad had heard his sister speak of it, and he was allowed to remain so in many ways, had not been forced to harden as Talia had after John was hidden from her. Barsad wonders at times how they all would have been if they had not been forced to separate, if John would be harder or his brother and sister softer. He thinks that it would be the later, that they are too enamored with their little bird to taint his innocence too much, that they would not have shielded him from the truth of the world but they would have tried to spare him from as much harshness as they could. John’s sweetness completes them in a way, softens the harsh edges Bane and Talia have, and Barsad does not wish them to lose it now. Barsad is well aware of what his brother and sister are willing to do to keep John with them. Most would assume it would be cruel things, that they will kill for him. Barsad knows that to be true but he also knows that they will spare an enemy if it will keep John from questioning his choice. When Bane speaks, Barsad listens, waits to see if John has managed to save Wayne for the moment.

“You can barely stand, John bird, go back in and rest. He cannot leave here tonight but I will not harm him further. His fate can be decided later, once you are in a better state to talk.”

Bane’s voice is honest, a hint of worry at John’s state and promises to his little one. Barsad knows this promise not to harm Wayne anymore tonight is hard for Bane to give, that a part of Bane would prefer to kill Wayne , to assure the man can not interfere in their lives in more. John takes Bane’s words for the truth that they are, breathes in pure relief. John gives a glance to Wayne as Talia starts to lead him back to the compound, as she soothes her little bird with words that get harder to hear as they move away. Bane lets his foot up just slightly, just enough to allow Wayne more breath, a chance to speak.

“He trusts you.” 

Wayne spits this out as he keeps up his struggles, so sure that Bane will still kill him even after his word to John. There is so much Wayne does not understand and Barsad knows that this lack of understanding is what drove him here. 

“He has remembered his past, Mr. Wayne, knows Bane as his protector now. There is no reason for him to not trust him. He knows of your part in his past as well. As for whether he trusts you now, I do not know.” 

Barsad says this as a he moves a little bit away, still keeping his eye on Wayne and his brother as he searches for something. Others are coming up the path and so there is not much way for Wayne to cause problems right now. He finds what he is looking for, picks it up and goes back to Wayne. It is fitting to use what was not used on John against the one who gave it to him. He is not gentle when he puts the syringe in Wayne’s arm but he is not harsh either. He does this task efficiently, knowing it is under half a dose but it will still make Wayne groggy, make him lose consensuses after a while with as worn as he must be after the fight. 

Bane moves his foot off of Wayne once Barsad is done with the sedative. He hauls him up, getting him ready for some of the other men to carry him to a room. Barsad can hear him say something to Wayne as he does so. 

“You owe your life tonight to John. He is much kinder to you than you deserve.” 

Wayne is not steady on his feet right now but he is not silent after Bane’s words.

“I am not the only one who doesn’t deserve his kindness.” 

The tone Wayne uses causes Bane to tighten his hold on Wayne’s suit, to pull him forward more. Barsad places his hand on Bane’s shoulder, just enough pressure to calm him, to help him not take Wayne’s bait. It is obvious that Wayne wants Bane tempted to break his promise, to prove himself unworthy of John’s trust. Barsad will not let Bane’s anger get to him, to cause him to do something that he may regret later. 

“Let the others take him in. Talia and John will be waiting.” 

It is enough to have Bane let go of Wayne, hand him off to the others. Barsad walks with Bane for a bit before making sure that Wayne has been secured. Once he knows that the man is guarded and that all the damage to the compound has been looked after, he makes his way to where he knows the others are. 

He is not surprised to find John asleep in the bedding, finally giving into the effects of the sedative Wayne had given him. Bane sits next to him, has placed John’s head in his lap. Talia is next to them, looking over the damage Wayne had inflicted upon Bane’s ribs. 

“Wayne is secured for the night. He will not be able to leave until it is decided what to do with him. Has he been asleep for long?” 

Barsad sits down, gently looks over John, and notices the forming of a few bruises on his arms from where Wayne held them. His breathing is steady and Barsad is certain he is not hurt. 

“Not very long. He wanted to talk about Wayne, talk to him, but that is something that will wait for morning. He does not want him harmed, still feels drawn to him. It would have been better if Wayne’s death had not been a lie.”

Talia’s words are soft and Barsad knows that she is worried. It is a difficult situation they find themselves in; John’s accepting of his place with them again is still tentative, still being built. Wayne’s reappearance may put doubts in him once again. Barsad has started inspecting Bane’s bruises now and he can feel the muscles under his fingers tense, sees how Bane places a hand on the back of John’s neck.

“I could still take care of Wayne tonight, John would not have to know the truth of it and he has mourned him before. Perhaps this time, it would go quicker, would not leave him so raw.” 

Bane’s voice is low, a quiet thing slipping out through his mask, soft so not to wake the figure in his lap. It is a thought Barsad has already had but has dismissed. Lies are not what are needed at this time, John needs truth. He is about to say so when Talia speaks.

“He could possibly see through it, still does not consider Wayne an enemy. If we kill him, John may try to turn away from us.”

There is frustration in her voice, a slight frown upon her face. She has placed her hand in John’s hair, the gesture possessive. Talia does not let go of what she considers hers, Barsad knows this, and John is hers in so many ways. Barsad places his hand over hers, makes sure that they are both listening to him.

“John cares deeply when he does and he cares for Wayne but he is still yours. Do not harm Wayne. He will try to put doubts in John but your bond is strong. Keep your word that Wayne will not be killed here and it will soothe any doubts he may have.”

His words make sense and he knows that they trust his judgment. If they kill Wayne now, it may destroy John’s trust in them. Barsad has no doubts that John’s place is with Bane and Talia but a small part of John belongs to Wayne as well. It will be important now to reassure John that he has made the right choice by coming back here, to allow him to confront Wayne about the choices the man has made. 

He speaks to them about this for a few moments. The discussion is hushed so that it does not wake John and by the end of it, Wayne’s fate is not completely decided but he will not be killed at this time but he must be kept here for a while. They will need to know what all is known about John and who knows it. It is decided that John will be allowed to see him but they will try to limit the time he has with him alone.

They rest after the conversation, John in the middle, care taken not to jostle Bane’s bruised body. In the morning, Barsad wakes when John and Talia do. Barsad is not surprised that the first thing John wants to know is where Wayne is, wants to see what state the man is in. 

“He lives, though he will more than likely be in pain. You asked for him to be spared and he will be. You may see him this afternoon. There are duties that we need to attend to this morning. We cannot let him leave right now but he will not be hurt, you have our word, John bird.”

Talia speaks to John, voice firm but gentle. She will not listen to any argument John may give to see Wayne earlier. John looks as if he wants to say something more but before he can, he catches a glimpse of Bane still lying asleep in the bedding, ribs bruised from Wayne’s efforts. There is a flash of guilt in his eyes. Barsad watches as John sits down next to Bane, fingers trailing over the marks, touch soft. Bane stirs just a little bit and soon his eyes open and look at John.

“I am fine, little bird. You do not need to worry. I have had much worse before.” 

John does not move his fingers, just looks at the bruises for just a moment before his eyes look at Bane’s face, at his mask. Talia comes and sits next to them, placing her body close to John’s. Barsad stands near by, listens as John speaks.

“I know. Thank you.”

There is no need for any of them to ask what John is saying thank you for. Wayne’s reappearance is a focus in all of their thoughts. Barsad comes closer, places a hand on John’s shoulder. Just a few weeks ago, he would have shrugged away from the touch but John is comfortable enough now that he simply looks up as Barsad speaks.

“He will need rest today. There is no permanent damage but some of his lower ribs are broken. They will heal in time. I will check up on things now.”

He receives a nod from all three of them, leaves them alone in the room. They will talk for a while and Talia plans to keep John away from Wayne for most of the day. Barsad makes his way towards the room that Wayne is being held in, the one that was once Talia’s, was once Wayne’s as well. It seemed fitting to place him there.

There are guards outside the door and Barsad speaks with them briefly, finds out how injured Wayne is. Food is soon brought and Barsad opens the door, takes it in so that he may speak with him alone. 

Wayne is in the bedding, his body sore from all that happened last night. Bane made sure to hit Wayne’s back, to aggravate the pain that must still be there and the bruises have made it stiff. He looks up as Barsad moves closer, sits down near him with the tray of food. Wayne does not take his eyes off of him though Barsad is not threatening him right now. Barsad takes a bowl off the tray, starts to eat from it, and gestures for Wayne to do the same. Wayne does not do so, simply glares at Barsad. There is silence for a few moments and Barsad eats a few more bites before speaking. 

“I assure you the food is not poisoned. John has asked for you not to be harmed and so you are safe for now.” 

Wayne still does not take the bowl but he does not stay silent.

“ I know that what John wants doesn’t matter to you. You’re Bane’s man, always have been, and Bane will want me dead.” 

His voice is laced with poison, his words sharp, and Barsad knows that Wayne would try to fight if he was in better condition. Barsad remains clam, simply takes a couple more bites of his porridge before speaking, and keeps his eyes focused on Wayne’s own.

“I am Bane’s, yes, but Bane belongs to Talia and John and so do I. You are safe here as long as you remain in John’s good graces. Talia and Bane do not wish him to suffer any more than he already has because of you.”

Barsad wishes the same even if he does not say it out loud. He has gotten to know John more as himself the last few weeks instead of just his brother’s and sister’s little one. He cares for him now, wants him here for him to be whole just as much as he wants it for Bane and Talia. Wayne complicates this. It will be easier if they can just let him leave but Barsad has a feeling that he will not want to leave John here.

“He has started a life here. Your city is safe from us. What purpose will it serve for you to take him from those who care for him?”

Barsad places his bowl down, waits for Wayne’s answer, an answer he is not certain will be given. There is tension in the air as Wayne starts to speak, anger evident in his words, in his eyes.

“I know what life he had here before, what was done to him, what you did to him. I won’t let that happen to him again.” 

The accusation is heavy in what he says and Barsad allows himself to feel anger at it. 

“There is more to his past than what Ra’s has done to him, much you do not understand. You took him from here but made no effort to care for him. You left him alone in that city, no idea of his past and now you would try to stop him from reclaiming it, from taking his place with those he was forced to give up.”

Everything would have been different if Wayne had just kept John with him, they would have known about John much sooner, could have went to Gotham before Ra’s. The past cannot be changed now and Barsad’s anger at it will do no good at this time. He lets his anger go, buries it for now, and rises from the floor.

Wayne says nothing to this and Barsad can see a mask settle over his features. The man will not speak to him anymore at this time and so Barsad prepares to leave Wayne right now. He does not take the food away, simply moves to the door. He turns towards Wayne, speaks one more time even if the man may not listen.

“You will be here for a while, until it is decided what should happen to you. You will be allowed to see John but keep in mind that he has regained his past, things may be different now. He will have questions for you and for his sake I hope you will answer them.”

There is nothing left for him to say right now and so Barsad leaves Wayne alone with his thoughts, to worry about what his fate may end up being.


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I was working on this when my computer restarted itself and did not keep the latest save but I managed to retype everything. This fic is so long so thanks for sticking with it.

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The compound really has not changed much from how it was so long ago. Bruce knows it is not the same building , that this is really just something new built on top of the ruins he made, but it is so very similar, particularly  this room that he is locked in.  He had spent a lot of time here once, time with John and the memories replay in his head when he first wakes up here, as he waits to find out what will happen.

 

He thinks about moving but his body aches and there is stiffness coming from his back.  Bane did not spare any hits, had gone for all of Bruce’s weak spots. His back is in awful shape right now but it is not as bad as it was the first time he faced Bane.  There is just enough noise to let him know there are guards posted outside the door. The numbers are against him. It would be difficult to escape and he won’t leave without John.

 

Bruce closes his eyes in pain briefly but not physical pain.  There is no chance that he will have a life with John now, no matter how much he may want it, but Bruce will do all that he can to ensure that  John has a life that is his, not one forced upon him.  The thought that John will not want to leave is painful but one that is a possibility. John had gone back with Talia, had taken Bane’s word without any hesitation.  John had asked for him to be kept alive and that is why Bruce is sure that there is a part of John that is still the one from Gotham.   Bruce hopes he will have a chance to speak with him, to see him again before he is killed or punished in some horrible way like before.  

 

He is alone for a while, a couple of hours before the door opens.  A part of him hopes it is John who will enter but another part expects Bane, perhaps with Talia .  Both of those thoughts are wrong.  It is Barsad who enters, carrying a tray of food that he sits  down with near Bruce.

 

There are no obvious threats from the man, no violence, but Bruce does not trust him, refuses the food he offers. There is talk,  Barsad remaining calm for the most  part but Bruce can see when he draws blood, when he speaks something he knows is true.  Barsad told Bruce once that he would help John but Bruce knows that he will only do so if it serves Bane and Talia, his loyalty to them is clear to see.  After a while, once Bruce refuses to engage in any more conversation, Barsad leaves telling Bruce he will see John at some point, leaves the food.  Bruce doesn’t believe him. He is left alone again.

 

There is not really much for him to do , his body needs rest and there is nothing in the room beside  some bedding, the food that was left . Bruce does not touch it, even though his stomach protests this action.  His cowl and most of his suit is gone, leaving him only in some pants. The room is laid out just as it used to be and there is a very small bathroom attached . The only time he gets out of the bedding is to go to it and his body protests even that small distance.  There is a grim comfort in knowing that even with as much pain as he is in, that he had managed to break some of Bane’s ribs, that the man’s breathing will be difficult today even with his chemicals reliving the pain.  The thought offers a bit of comfort but it does nothing to help pass the time, which is going slowly.

 

It is late afternoon before anyone approaches the door again.  There are footsteps getting closer but before the door is opened, they pause and Bruce can hear the soft murmur of familiar voices just outside.  One brings him anger, confusion, and hurt, the other fills him with a sense of sadness, of longing for things he cannot have.  He listens to the soft words, hears the exchange.

 

“He is unharmed, I promise. There are only men posted here to make sure he does not try anything foolish.”

The false tones of Miranda Tate no longer can be heard in her voice, it is all Talia now.  Bruce can hear the difference, once again hates himself for not knowing that she was hiding something.

 

“I want to see him, alone.”

 

It is the same voice John used when he came to talk to him about being Batman, filled with determination.  

 

“John bird, I do not think that would be a good idea right now. I will come with you.”

 

There is not as much warning or harshness in her voice as Bruce expected when John spoke. It is has a tinge of concern, affection that sounds genuine that is hard to believe of someone who has lied so much.

 

“I need to see him alone , if just for a few moments.”

 

 Those words are spoken with need. Bruce waits for Talia’s rejection of that need but the voices are silent for a few moments, just a small amount of noise coming through the door .  It is Talia who speaks after the moments pass.

 

“Only a few minutes, I  will wait here.”

 

John says nothing that Bruce can hear and it is only a few seconds then the door is open. Bruce catches a small glimpse  of Talia, face  set in a neutral expression as John walks in but it is gone quickly as the door closes.  Bruce sits up, ignores the pain in his body, as John starts to walk closer.  

 

It is a bit like their first meeting. The room is much the same, John being the one to walk through the door, and Bruce waiting in the bedding to see what will happen.  So much has changed since then but Bruce can still see that boy in the man who stands near him now, can see more of him than he had when John came to him in Gotham.  

 

“I thought I would never see you again.”

 

John  has neared the bedding, stands next  to it. He licks his lips a tiny bit when he speaks and Bruce can see how red they are .He can feel a tiny bit of jealousy flare at  the idea of why they are that color.  The mark that was on his throat has faded now, no fresh one replacing it . Bruce wonders if John has not given Talia a chance to replace or if she simply did not feel the need to since he was no longer around to see it.

 

“John.”

 

All he says is his name, doesn’t get a chance to  say more before John sits down next to him.  They are not quite touching.  Neither of them says anything for a moment, not sure what to say.John is looking over Bruce, his eyes lingering on the scars on his bare chest. He is startled when John brushes a finger against his back softly, touching the  bruises that have no doubt formed.

 

“You’re banged up a bit.  Both of you are.”

 

John moves his fingers after he says this. His arms are visible and there are bruises littering them, from Bruce’s hands no doubt. There is a bit of guilt at the sight of them but they were not done to harm him.  He wants to look more closely at John’s arms, at the crook where the marks are but John shifts from him before he can.

 

“ This is where we met for the first time. You never told me. Why?”

 

There is hurt in John’s words, a tiny bit of anger starting  to seep into them.  He is staring at Bruce, his eyes questioning. John deserves answers and Bruce can give him that at least.

 

“You didn’t remember, had a fresh start, it didn’t seem like a good idea to remind you of what happened to you before. I was trying to keep you safe.”

 

There is so much more Bruce could say, should say, but this will have to enough for now.  He doesn’t know how much time he will have with John before Talia comes into the room and he needs to speak with him, to convince him to leave even if it isn’t with Bruce.  He grabs John’s hand, pulls him a little closer so he  can speak quietly, can make sure John is listening.

 

“I just want you to be safe, to be able to have a life that you choose.”

 

It is one of the most honest things Bruce has said. There is no mask on his face right now, he is hiding nothing from John  in this moment.

 

“I chose to go with them.  They won’t hurt me.”

 

John doesn’t pull his hand away, simply looks at Bruce like he is trying to get him to understand. His voice is so sure, confident in his trust in Talia and Bane, trust that Bruce is not sure hasn’t been forced upon him. He grips his hand just a little tighter before speaking again, his words rushing out.

 

“John, think of what they were willing to do to make you go with them, what they did to Gotham.  They are dangerous.”

 

“ You could be, too. They won’t hurt Gotham again, I can make sure of it.”

 

There is calm in John’s voice as he says this, a need to reassure Bruce that everything is going to be ok.

 

“They can be stopped, you don’t have to stay here just to keep them in check. ”

There is a bit more anger in John’s eyes after he says this, a tiny bit of worry, but for what Bruce is not sure.

 

“I care about them. Maybe I shouldn’t, but I remember now, how safe I was with them, how much I cared for them once, how much they care for me.  I don’t want to leave them behind. I can’t.”

 

John’s voice is so sincere, so truthful, but Bruce remembers what was done to him before, Talia’s desperate need to have John leave with them, Bane’s vow to return John to his proper place and he can feel anger rise at him at the thought of John being manipulated once again, lied to.

 

“Is that what you remember or what they told you?”

 

John’s eyes flare at Bruce’s words.  He doesn’t move away from Bruce but his words are rushed when he speaks,  so many emotions coating them. 

 

“I remember almost everything now, even you being here.  I am sure about my feelings for them, for you, no matter what has happened, everything done, I can’t stop caring that easily. Talia has promised the League is done with Gotham and I believe her.”

 

His face looks so young right now, so much like the boy who used to tell Bruce about his dew drop.  Bruce  needs John to understand that his memories can’t  always be trusted

 

“They wanted you back, are desperate to keep you, turn you against the life you had without them.  Barsad was the one to mix the chemicals before, he could do so again, maybe is doing it right now.”

 

John’s rage boils to the surface at his words. He pulls his hand out of Bruce’s grip, stands up quickly and thrusts his arms out so that the scars are clearly seen. There are no fresh marks there.

 

“They aren’t drugging me to keep me here, they aren’t like him. I know what Ra’s tried to do to me, they wouldn’t do that.”

 

There is a tremor to his voice when he says Ra’s name and Bruce wants nothing more than to hold him but he knows it wouldn’t be welcome right now.  Bruce stands up as he speaks, pushes the pain down. There is more he has to say, knows it will hurt John, but he can’t let it go unsaid. He grabs John’s shoulders, fingers digging in as he speaks.

 

“There are other ways to give you the drugs.  Talia took up her father’s mission, knowing what he did to you, held to his ideals despite all the pain he caused you both. What makes you so certain that she won’t take it up again later, won’t try to  convince you that it is what you want as well? It was her father’s dream for Gotham to die and he wanted the two of you to do it, to rule the League together. It may be her dream as well. ”

 

Bruce’s words cut John, are harsh, but he needs to get them out. It is his main worry, that even after all this time and Ra’s in the ground, that the man will still somehow win, will get the heir he was trying so hard to turn John into.   John had been like a beacon of hope when he showed up on his doorstop, had made him see that there were things worth fighting for, and he hates the idea of John becoming as Ra’s had been, a fanatic who no longer saw any good in this world. The thought of it makes his fingers dig in deeper, as if his touch can somehow stop that from happening.  

 

The door suddenly opens, Talia  appears, running to John quickly. She grabs Bruce’s hands, pulls them off of John.  She holds them tightly, her nails digging into his skin. Her face is still calm but her eyes burn with anger.

 

“I am not my father. I will not destroy John to keep him with me.”

 

“But you will threaten anything else he may care about to keep him.”

 

He hits a nerve, those nails drawing blood at his words.  With a just a word, Talia can order men into this room, can have him killed. The word doesn’t come as John wraps his hands around hers, takes them off of Bruce’s own.  John’s eyes lock with Talia before he  speaks, no glance at Bruce and that hurts more than  he thought it would.

 

“Keep your word. I can’t stay in this room right now. I need to think, let me.”

 

There is anger in him right now, coming off of him in waves and pain, so much pain.  John doesn’t say anything else, releases Talia’s hands, and makes his ways hurriedly out of the room. Talia is staring at him, those eyes still glittering with anger, and Bruce expects her to kill him herself now. Instead, she walks away , shuts the door and he is alone again.

 

 

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	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, another chapter. There is angst but also a bit of fluff so hopefully it balances out. I swear that I used to write updates under 2000 words.

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Talia waits two hours, cannot force herself to wait any longer than that, before searching for John.  She attended to various small tasks, avoided going near Wayne again, but after a while her thoughts had drifted back to John and Wayne’s words.  Wayne has hurt her little bird and she hopes he has not poisoned him against them, against taking his place. John wanted time alone but there is only so much she can give him without needing to see him, to reassure herself that  he has not fled from here. She needs to talk to him , to soothe him.

 

John’s talk with Wayne has shaken her as well. She knows that she can be cruel, that some of her actions in Gotham hurt him just as Wayne had but for Wayne to accuse her of using her father’s methods  had angered her more than she expected.  She had wanted to hurt him so badly after that, had wanted to end him there so that he could no longer influence John in any way but her bird’s simple words had stopped her.  Now, she needs to find John, let him know that she has kept her word.

 

She walks quickly, does not speak with anyone else. It is proving difficult to find him, he is not in any of the spots that he usually goes to when he needs to thinks.  She searches most of the compound before a thought occurs to her and she makes her way to a room that she has not stepped into in a long time.  Her father’s old chamber had been rebuilt but she never felt the need to  visit it and now she opens the door, finds it empty but the door to the one next to it is slightly ajar.  She makes her way to it, pushes it open quietly.

 

The room is bare, nothing in it but John who has his back to her. There is relief to see him still here but she does not go to him yet. Instead, she speaks to him from where she stands in the doorway.

 

“Wayne lives. You can see him again if you need reassurance.”

 

He turns at her words and there is still trust in his face when he looks at her. She is so very glad to see it there but she knows that there may still be doubt in him.

 

“Good.”

 

It is a simple word spoken with just a small nod and Talia moves forward at it.  She stands in the chamber now, but still a bit from John.  He may need distance for a few moments more  and Talia does not want to spook him right now.  The room is silent for a while, Talia waiting for the right moment to speak or for John to do so.  John takes a breath, closes his eyes for a few seconds as if overwhelmed by something. He opens them and speaks, it is soft, the words pained.

 

“This is where he kept me, after he brought me back here so that he could train Bruce. “

He visited me in here often, would tuck me in like he had when we were young but it was not a comfort like it was before. None of my old things were put in here, nothing that would remind me of you or Bane.”

 

He is speaking of her father, their father in a way. Talia says nothing, knows that now is the time to listen. They do not talk about this, everyone finding it much too painful, but if John finds himself strong enough to speak of it right now, Talia will be strong enough to listen.

 

“I managed to keep my locket the longest before that was taken, by Barsad.   Bruce gave it to me later and I kept it hidden after that. I was so thankful to have it back, to be able to think of you. He helped me more than anybody else, listened to me, let me talk about you. I could  be John with him, not Robin.   Even with everything else he has done, he was the only friend I knew I had back then and I will always care for him because of that.”

 

Talia has always focused on how Wayne had wronged her little bird, how he had kept him from them that it is strange to hear how he helped John back then.  If Wayne had only kept John with him, they would have sought him out,  would have considered him a brother for helping their little one.  John continues with the story of what happened and so Talia does not dwell on thoughts of what might have been.

 

“He started with the drug in water but I figured that out, refused to drink it and so he switched to having me injected, called it my medicine, and said it would help me.  I fought it but at times it seemed easier to give in, to just listen to everything he told me.  He was so different than he was before, so determined to have me loyal to him in a way he had never demanded before.  He wanted me to forget more than just you and Bane, wanted me to forgot my past in Gotham as well, wanted me to think of him as the only family I had ever had, would ever need. He wasn’t your father during that time, was more monster than what he claimed Bane to be.”

 

John is shaking, his eyes wet but the tears do not fall.  Talia had ideas about what happened, knew some of it from Barsad but it is different hearing it from John.  This pains her but she knows it is worse for him. She cannot keep away from him, moves closer but does not touch him, not yet.

 

“You are not what your father became but what happened in Gotham is something he would have approved of , would have deemed needed.  Please tell me that is the past, that you can’t be like him, won’t be like that.”

 

 His voice is so desperate, so  much like it used to sound when he was worried she would send him away. Talia touches his arm, softly. She makes no other move towards him, keeps her voice steady as she speaks.   Lies have hurt her little bird so much and so she tells truth even if some of that may bruise him slightly.

 

“ I wanted you by my side again, wanted to hurt Wayne. That was the easiest way to have both, to make you choose in that way. I know it hurt you but I was not sure what other choice I could give you.  Your place is with me, with us, and I will do what I must to keep you with us but I will not do that again, will not strike out at Gotham if you believe it should live.”

 

Talia has spoken with Bane about this, about the fact that with all the  corruption still in Gotham, that their little bird sees hope in it. They have decided to leave it alone as a gift for him, as a show of trust in his judgment. She moves a little closer, strokes his arm.

 

“I will not do what my father did, could never bring myself to do that.  I want you whole, will not try to cut out the sweetness in you that I had missed so much.”

 

It is the truth  she wraps her warp her arms around him.  John lets her, doesn’t flinch from her touch and it helps lift a bit of the worry from her. He is still shaking slightly but it is lessening and she soothes him, whispers soft words to him.

 

“We need you, little bird, never doubt that.”

 

He wraps his arms around her now as well, lets her hold him close. His words are a whisper, but she can hear them clearly and finds them beautiful and honest.

 

“I need you both as well, dew drop.”

 

It is a sweet reassurance but she wonders if he needs Wayne as well. The thought makes fresh jealousy rise in her but  she smoothers it down. If it will make her John whole, will allow him take his place with her, she can  give him Wayne but she fears it may not be that simple. She pushes thoughts of Wayne aside as she comforts her little bird, as she reassures him that what happened to him before will never happen again.  

 

 

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Talia’s arms are around him and John just stands for  a few minutes with her like this, wrapped up together and her murmuring reassurances to him.  He feels so worn out, Bruce’s words causing him to think of things that hurt him, to cause so many doubts to surface.   He is so angry at him right now, at what he has said but he still can’t hate him. Talia said he was safe, that he can go see him if he needs but he doesn’t think he should right now. Right now, he is choosing to trust her, to trust his feelings for her, and he will deal with his feelings for Bruce later.

 

“Do you need more time alone here?”

 

Talia asks and her arms tighten around him just slightly. 

 

“No.”

 

He is ready to leave this room and all the memories it holds. They leave together, Talia holding his hand.  They walk down the halls and Talia slows slightly when they are near the one that leads to her old room, to where Bruce is right now.  John cannot help but look down the hall way sees  Barsad has just exited the room.

 

“Do you need to see him now?”

 

Talia says this softly as Barsad approaches them. John needs to soon but he doesn’t think he can right now, the anger still too fresh so he shakes his head at the question.

 

“I will see him tomorrow.”

 

Talia says nothing to this, simply squeezes his hand lightly. Barsad reaches them, speaks as they start to walk away and he walks with them.

 

“I brought him food but I am not certain he will eat. He stayed silent but he is well.”

 

 

John feels relief that Bruce is being given the things he needs even if he won’t talk them right now. They talk for a few minutes and John is still not sure what is going to happen to Bruce but for right now he is safe and that will have to be enough.  Barsad leaves them to take care of other things while Talia walks with him  to another part of the compound.

John is not sure why they are going this way, Talia insisting that they need to do something.

 

“We can go back to our  room, you don’t need to distract me with whatever it is you are.”

 

“It is not a distraction, just something that has slipped our minds due to the excitement of the last day.”

 

John thinks about her words, is not sure what she is referring to , but when they reach a closet and Talia opens it and pulls out some items from it,  today’s date flashes in his mind and he knows what she is referring to.

 

“Bane’s day.”

 

She nods at him, hands him something.  He feels a bit of guilt for not thinking of it as he holds the yarn she hands him.     He and Talia had gone to the village alone just last week, had picked out something to give to him when this day came.  Talia finding new sturdy needles for him and John getting him some yarn of varying colors, a simple gift but one that he would enjoy.    It had been strange picking out a gift for him after all this time but it had felt comforting at same time as well, an old tradition that he had just remembered and had missed.

 

“Come, we will get everything for our evening meal and then go back to the room, eat, and gives these to him.”

 

John nods at her, helps her to bundle their gifts in a way so that they can be hidden and follows her to the kitchens.  As they get everything ready to go to the room, he thinks of the knife that is kept in his pocket even now, takes it out and looks at it. Talia notices him doing this, puts her fingers over his where they hold it.

 

“He had gotten that for you before his exile. He took it with him, kept it so once we were back together he could give it to you. It was kept safe for years, mostly hidden away but sometimes I saw him looking at it when he thought I wasn’t watching.”

 

John feels a tightness in his throat at her words, takes a breath before he speaks.

 

“I was so scared when Barsad gave it to me, I didn’t understand why Bane of all people would feel the need to give me a gift for my birthday.  I remember now, mostly feelings, but it is still hard to connect  the Bane in Gotham with our protector .”

 

Talia smiles when he says protector , strokes his fingers once before moving her hand away.

 

“He wanted you to know he cares, we both did. We should go back to our room now.”

 

He puts the knife away, helps carry everything to their room.  They enter it quietly and as they near the bed, they can see Barsad sitting with Bane, an empty bowl beside them as well as the mask.

 

“You do not have to watch this John bird.”

 

Bane’s voice is quiet, laced with agony.  The mask was taken off so that he could eat and Barsad could change the chemicals and it is the first time in years John has seen him without it.

 

“It is all right, I have seen it before.”

 

He helps Talia put everything down, makes his way to the bed as Barsad works to get everything right on the mask. John has seen it before, remembers it, but it is still startling to see all the scars  around Bane’s mouth and the pain etched on his face.  Bane did not like to have Talia and John with him when the mask was changed, did not want them upset at seeing him in such pain. The only reason why he started to let them sit and watch was because John had told him he wanted to see his face with out the mask. Now, John sits with Talia close to Bane and watches as Barsad readies the mask.

 

Barsad takes a quick moment to touch Bane’s lips with a finger tip gently and then gives them a quick kiss. It is such an intimate moment and John almost blushes at it. When Barsad pulls away, Talia leans forward and very gently kisses a few of the scars around his mouth before placing a final kiss softly on his lips. This is their ritual, something that is for the three of them ,an act they have done many times before he is certain and John can feel all the years they spent apart so strongly in this moment that it makes his chest ache.

 

Bane looks at John for just a moment before he looks back at Barsad, giving him permission to put the mask upon his face. Barsad starts to lift it up and John stops him, places his fingers on it and moves it away.

 

“Wait.  Please.”

 

This is selfish of him, to prolong Bane’s misery, to infringe on something they made without him, that they don’t need him to be a part of.  Bane looks at him once again, a sort of wonder in his eyes and it gives John the permission to lean forward, to put just the smallest amount of pressure against those scared lips before pulling back. Barsad puts the mask on Bane once John is finished. With the mask firmly in place, Bane lifts a finger to John’s face  and traces his lips briefly, a gesture John has seen him do with Talia a few times.

 

“ Is the pain better now?”

 

John asks , knows not to ask if it is gone.  Bane nods, looks pleased in this moment.  

 

“We brought you some things.”

 

Talia smiles at them, gives Bane  the needles.  There are new shears near by that must be form Barsad.  John pulls out the yarn, gets ready to hand it to him when Bane speaks.

 

“You already gave me a precious gift, little one.”

 

The way he says this makes John blush and Barsad teases him for it as he hands the yarn over anyway.

 

“The color of this one  matches your face right now, John. Is that why you picked it?”

 

He swats Barsad on the nose and it earns a quiet chuckle from all but Barsad who complains that it now hurts. 

 

“So what do you want a kiss to make it better?”

 

This earns a smirk, a clear challenge as Barsad says perhaps. John feels more comfortable with them all and so he does give Barsad a small peck on the tip of his nose as Bane and Talia watch in amusement.  Bane soon is working with his new yarn as the rest of them eat. Talia steals bites from John’s plate, takes sips of his water, and he knows  why she does,  appreciates the tiny reassurances that  any doubts Bruce has are unfounded.  John will still need to talk to Bruce, try to figure out where the man’s place is in his life now but that is for tomorrow.

 

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	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So another chapter. Hope you guys enjoy.

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The room is peaceful, mostly dark, only a bit of moonlight streaming in, and filled with the even breathing of the others as they sleep but Bane stays awake. He had done so part of last night as well, due to both pain and worry about what Wayne’s appearance here would mean for them but it is different tonight. He is still in pain, can feel the bruising of his body when one of the others brush against him, and there is still worry in his thoughts but his main feeling in this moment is one of contentment. He had spent his evening receiving gifts and attention from those he cares for and now they all lay together in their bedding, it is a comfort that Bane enjoys, had not always thought would be possible.

His eyes look over the room as he lies awake, landing on the needles and yarn that sits a little bit a ways, the beginning of what Bane has decided will be a scarf for John. It was a simple gift, one that they had gotten him in the past but one that he has always appreciated. They will get much use as will the shears Barsad gifted him with. The yarn was a nice gesture but it is not the gift that left Bane feeling so grateful and content with the evening. He had meant it when he said that John bird’s kiss was a precious gift, one Bane had been surprised to receive. 

Bane had always considered any physical touch that either of his little ones gave him a gift but the ones from John have always been rarer. Talia had never been stingy with her touches to him, would huddle as close to him as possible, a habit born from needing each other’s warmth in the pit. John had been almost shy when he was young, not one for touch from many except for Talia. He would touch Bane on occasion, such as the hug on their first meeting but had been more hesitant in accepting such things from Bane. Those first few months, he would sleep with them, cuddled between them as that is where Talia would insist he be, but he would cling to her more, body touching Bane’s but not seeking him out. Bane had never taken offense to it, had simply made sure that when he placed an arm around them both, that his skin touched Talia’s. As the months passed and John’s trust in Bane grew, he started accepting more touches, would allow a ruffle to his hair and Bane’s arm around him as he slept. Bane had cherished each one, would never push for any, just as he had not pushed for the kiss tonight.

The thought of the kiss causes his eyes to move towards one of the figures near him, to move his finger and give a soft, quick touch to John’s lips. It is a gesture he has only started giving to John tonight, unsure if it would be accepted until John had given him that kiss. It had been sweet how hesitant he had been when placing his lips on Bane’s own, almost scared he would be denied, that it would not be welcome. Bane would accept any sign of affection that John gives him, especially now when the thought of once again losing him is fresh in Bane’s mind. The kiss is proof that John trusts them, cares for them and Bane hopes it will be enough to soothe the doubts Wayne brings with him.

He knows that Wayne will attempt to sway their little bird away from them, Barsad speaking with him about what was said earlier and he is certain Wayne said similar things to John. It would be easier to end him and Bane had thought about it but it could drive John away. The problem of Wayne will be something they will all deal with later, for now they are all here and Bane focuses on that, on the feeling of being whole and waits for sleep to come to him.

Sleep does come to him, a restful one and he wakes in the morning. The bed is cold, the others leaving it early enough that their heat has left it completely by now. Bane tries not to let the thought trouble him, there are many things that need attending to and Bane is supposed to rest for the next few days, allow his body to heal. As nice as it would be for the others to be able to stay with him, it is not very feasible. Bane simply works with his yarn for a little while, content with it but soon he grows restless. He makes his way out of the bedding, moves slowly as to not make the pain flare up too much and makes his way outside to the courtyard. Bed rest has only been for a day but he wants some fresh air.

Bane can see the others and makes his way to them. Talia is sparring with John while Barsad watches. He sees Bane and makes his way over, voice scolding lightly.

“You should not be moving too much right now. The bruising needs to heal.”

“I will not join, just watch for a few moments. I wanted a change of scenery.”

Barsad nods at his words, leads Bane closer so they may both watch. John is improving quite a bit, his old skills returning with practice and Talia has always been quick, moves beautifully. Bane enjoys watching , has enjoyed when he has practiced with any of them. They are both trying to pin the other. John manages to have Talia under him but she is not upset, instead simply leans up and gives a kiss that has John loosening his hold. When he lets go, she attacks again and they continue their fight that looks much more like a game between the two of them.

“They look right together.”

Barsad speaks this thought after the kiss and Bane agrees with it. It is a few minutes longer and then the sparring is done and they make their way to them. They make their way back inside, a little conversation taking place but of the most part it is a quiet walk. Bane goes back to the chamber while the others go to the kitchens. He settles down once again, works on his knitting for a few moments before Talia comes into the room, alone, with a tray that has enough food for the two of them.

“Barsad and John are taking a meal to Wayne. He wishes to speak with him again but it would not be a good idea for him to be with Wayne alone.”

She does not sound pleased at this, simply resigned that John still cares for Wayne. It is such a difficult thing to watch John give attention and care to one who has hurt him so much. It had been difficult in Gotham and even more so now. They finally have their John Bird back and Wayne is causing him to spend less time with them, is separating them again even if just for moments instead of years. He takes her hand, offers truth.

“Our little bird is so sweet but stubborn, does not give up things he cares for, much like you. He cares for Wayne but his home is with us, he knows that. We simply have to wait for Wayne to know the same.”

If Wayne can accept that John wants to be here, can agree to leave and not make any move to take John away from here, than he can be let go, no harm done to him and John will not feel conflicted any longer. It may not be that simple but for now the words are enough to reassure Talia and they spend a quiet meal together, trying not to think of how the meal in Wayne’s room is going. 

*^*^*^*^*  
Barsad had not been surprised when he was told that Wayne still had not eaten any of the food given to him. It would be a simple thing to not give him any more but despite his cruel words, John does not want any harm to come to Wayne and so a simple meal has been prepared and Barsad takes it with John to Wayne. It will be an interesting lunch, Barsad would much rather spend the time with Bane and Talia, but John will need another with him for his visit with Wayne.

They are nearing the hallway that houses Wayne and Barsad turns to John, speaks to him about his interaction with Wayne from the other day.

“He was hostile and I do not know what he said to you and to Talia yesterday but I can guess and you were shaken when I saw you after. If you are unsure about speaking with him now, then I can go in alone. I swear that nothing will happen to him.”

John shakes his head, keeps moving forward, closer to where Wayne is.

“No, I need to see him.”

Barsad says nothing else, is glad that John is at least not insisting on seeing him alone. They enter the room slowly, Barsad going in first and Wayne sits up at the noise at the door. His eyes are not happy when they see Barsad, are cold, but as soon as John enters, they change. He is surprised at John’s appearance and there is almost a look of regret and longing upon his face. It is only there for a moment and then the mask is back on. 

“Hey, we brought you some food. I know this isn’t exactly the best situation but you need to eat. I made it if it makes you feel better.” 

Wayne does not say anything at John’s words but he takes the offered bowl. He does not eat from it, not yet, but just holding it with his own hands is more than he was willing to do yesterday. Barsad sits across from Wayne and says nothing as John sits on the bedding with him. They do not touch, John has taken care to put a little distance between them but they are very near each other and Barsad can see the little glimpses they each give the other from moment to moment. The next few moments are filled with silence, just the sounds of Barsad and John starting their meal and Wayne just sitting there, alternating staring at John and at his food. 

Barsad expects after a few moments that Wayne will not eat once again but he is surprised as the man takes one more look at John before taking a bite. There is a look of relief on John’s face as Wayne eats. It does not last as Wayne starts to speak.

“I’m surprised you are allowed to visit after yesterday.”

His words sound causal but there is a bite to them. Barsad says nothing, wants John to be the one to comment on Wayne’s obvious bait. 

“It is my choice to see you. I didn’t have to be given permission.”

There is a bit of irritation in John’s voice and Barsad wonders if he should intervene or allow the conversation to continue unguided. He goes with the latter option for now and listens as Wayne continues speaking. 

“John, Talia stood outside the door yesterday and now he is here as a baby sitter. They may try telling you that you have a choice but has anything that has happened since you left Gotham been only your decision and not theirs as well?”

Wayne has put his bowl down, little of it eaten, and moves closer to John. He is ignoring Barsad for the most, his only focus is John. 

“ It is not that simple. You really don’t have much right to talk about my choices being taken away from me. You made a decision for me once, by putting me in St. Swithin’s with no idea of my past.”

John hits a nerve with this truth. His words are filled with fire, anger at Wayne. There is hurt flashing across Wayne’s face but also guilt as he leans towards John, grabs his arms. John does not move from his touch though he stiffens at it.

“You said you wanted to return to Gotham and I thought you would be safe there, could maybe be adopted and have a better life. I wanted what was best for you and that is what I want now.”

It is interesting hearing Wayne’s reasoning after so many years. John shakes his head at it a bit, speaks the words so soft that Barsad barely makes them out.

“ I wanted to go back to Gotham with you, not be left alone again.”

Wayne does not acknowledge John’s soft words. Barsad does not know if he did not hear them or is choosing not to. He instead holds John close, almost close enough to kiss and speaks again. 

“I know you care for them but this is not what you need. They want you with them and I have no doubt they will do a lot to keep you with them. They might not be doing what Ra’s did but they still forced you to come here, don’t trust you enough to let you be alone with me.”

Wayne has been doing a wonderful job of hurting his standing with John but Barsad will not allow him to plant this sort of doubt into John’s head. He stands up, makes sure his words are directed at Wayne but that John will be sure of their meaning as well. 

“He is not the one who is not trusted, Mr. Wayne. For all your talk about John being forced to stay here, you are the one who attempted to drug and drag him away. You are the one who took him from Ra’s but made no real effort to provide a life for him. ”

Wayne turns at his words, stares as if Barsad has interrupted something important. It breaks the moment, John working his way out of Wayne’s hold, picking up his dishes. He does not want to speak right now, makes his way to and out of the door. Barsad stays a moment longer with out John and makes his way to the door, stands and faces Wayne. 

“I realize what you are trying to do, Mr. Wayne, but it will not work as well as you wish it to. Even with unlimited access to you, John will still spend a large portion of time with us, will not just take your word as blindly as he did in Gotham.”

Wayne gets up at this ,walks towards Barsad. He is standing as straight as he can, an obvious intimidating posture but he makes no move to attack. 

“Is that supposed to be a threat?”

His words are spoken with a stubbornness. Barsad answers him before leaving the room, gives him more advice than perhaps he should. 

“It is merely a suggestion that you think about how you speak to him. Your situation here depends upon his favor, I have already told you this, and so does your ability to see him. If you wish to spend time with him, it may serve you well to watch your tongue.”

Barsad has no idea if the advice will be heeded but for John’s sake, he hopes it is. 

*^*^*^*^*


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got really stuck on this for a bit but I got unstuck so hopefully people will enjoy this chapter. At some point this story will end, it just has become a bit of a monster.

*^*^*^*^*  
After his meal with John and Barsad’s parting words, Bruce is left alone for most of the day. The door was locked like it has been since he was put here and there is occasionally the sound of footsteps, of the guards switching. He could time it, possibly catch them off guard but it would do little good. It would be difficult to leave in the condition he is in and he doesn’t want to leave John here. He is banged up, it has been commented on by John and Barsad as well when he had brought him his dinner the day before. He had offered to look Bruce over but he does not trust the man, doesn’t trust the food he brings either. His stomach is mostly empty, only eating a little bit of the food John brought. 

There is nothing to do, nothing to occupy his time with. He paces the room for a bit, gages how sore his body is, how stiff his movements are. It will take a while for his body to recover. He forces himself to lie down, to try to rest but it is difficult. His mind keeps drifting back to John, to those soft words he had tried to ignore. 

I wanted to go back to Gotham with you, not be left alone again.

It is something Bruce has thought about before, has pushed out of his mind but now it will not leave him alone. He had thought at the time it was the best thing to stay out of John’s life but now he is not sure. Could things have been better if he would have stayed in John’s life? There is now way to know, no way to change it now. Bruce has no idea if he can do anything to change John’s life now or even his own fate. For all he knows, Bruce will never leave this room again. 

It is like being in the pit again, trapped with mostly just his thoughts for company. At times he thought he was going to die there but the need to return to Gotham, to John, kept him fighting. This time he doesn’t know if those thoughts will be enough. He is dead to Gotham now and John is pulling away from him just as Bruce always knew he would once the truth was revealed. This is worse than he imagined because John is not just simply turning away from him but turning to others, ones from the past Bruce tried to save him from, who hate Bruce and would love for John to do the same. Perhaps it would have been better to tell John the truth when he had the chance but that chance is gone now. 

He is plagued by thoughts of what could have been, what should have been. He feels more alone than he has in a long time and a lot of it is his own doing. It is hard to push it out of his mind but he eventually drifts off. He is not sure how many hours pass when the sound of the door opening and footsteps entering wakes him up. He turns towards the sounds and it is John who has entered. It is just him, just John , carrying a tray with food and a few other things, and he shuts the door behind him.

Bruce sits up in the bedding, watches as John moves forward to the bedding, sets the tray down and hands Bruce a plate and sits down. He doesn’t have any food for himself, just for Bruce. John keeps a bit of distance between them on the bedding, it is just enough to show Bruce that John is not sure how much interaction he wants with him right now. It hurts to know that John is upset with him. 

“You need to eat and I need to speak to you.”

Bruce should be silent, should let John speak, but he is not sure how much time he will have with him, how much longer he will be able to tell him what he needs to. 

“John, I need..”

He starts to speak but John cuts him off by placing a finger on his lips. He keeps it there just a second before moving it way and Bruce feels the loss of his touch quickly. John speaks, eyes focused on Bruce’s own. 

“You need to listen. I care for you, I think you know that and I still don’t get why you didn’t tell me the truth , you had chances. Every time we saw each other, spoke, you could have told me. When I showed up at the manner did you think of telling me then?”

That seems so long ago now, that day John came back into his life. Bruce couldn’t tell him the truth back then but now there is no reason to keep it from him. He remembers and he deserves to hear Bruce’s side now as well.

“When you came, I thought you had remembered, were there to confront me about it. I was surprised when you talked about seeing me at the orphanage instead, about knowing I was Batman. You had made something of yourself and I didn’t want to tell you and possibly destroy that.”

He doesn’t tell John about how he worried about Ra’s influence, about how he wasn’t sure how much of the conditioning remained. He knows by the look on John’s face that he understands that unspoken fear, that he isn’t going to ask about what Bruce thought about what Ra’s did to him. John stays quiet, gives Bruce a chance to say more and so he does.

“I stayed away from you after I brought you back, didn’t want to remind you of your time here. I had tried to push you out of my mind and then you showed up at my door . I needed to keep my distance from you, let you keep the blank slate you had.”

Bruce puts the plate down. He can’t eat right now, can’t bring himself to until he and John have talked. John tenses at his words, speaks again, and his eyes never leave Bruce’s face, watching for his reaction. 

“You didn’t stay away after I came to you, you called me, came to the police station. I went back to your place, told you that I couldn’t remember a chunk of my life and you said nothing, didn’t say anything that night at my apartment, after you knew Bane had my hair.”

John’s voice holds just a bit of anger, a bit of hurt. Bruce had been trying to protect him but even good intentions can have consequences. 

“I thought I would have a chance to later, after taking care of Bane. I didn’t want to lose you before I had to.”

It is the truth and it hurts Bruce to say it. John was never really his but Bruce wanted to pretend for a little bit, didn’t want to give up the connection they had. 

“I knew I should stay away but I wanted to see how you had changed from that boy I knew before. I was lonely, needed someone.”

Alfred had known that, had pointed it out, though Bruce didn’t want to listen. All he could focus on was how the people he cared about got hurt. John closes his eyes for a moment at his words, tenses almost as if the words hit him, before opening them and speaking to Bruce, words heavy with emotion.

“Is that why you kissed me, slept with me? You were lonely and I was there? Was it just because you hadn’t done it in such a long time and I was willing?”

His voice is accusing and he starts to get up off the bedding. Bruce can’t let him get angry enough to leave, needs to keep him here as long as he can and so he gets up with him, pulls John’s body close to his. 

“I slept with you because I wanted to, because I care for you and wanted to be with you while there was still a chance to. I never meant to hurt you .”

It is an apology or at least the closest to one Bruce can give. He expects John to pull away at this but he doesn’t. Instead, John leans forwards, covers Bruce’s mouth with his own. It is not like the kisses John gave him before, shy and gentle, this is rough, angry, bruising. His hands wrap around Bruce’s back, more gently than the kiss but there is still a bit of pressure against it, just enough to make a tiny bit of pain flare up. Bruce ignores it, returns the kiss for all that he can. This may be the last time he can do this, have this with John. John pulls away after a moment and Bruce wants nothing more than to pull him back, reclaim his mouth but John stills him.

“No one meant to hurt me but it still happened. I have so few people I trust and all of them lied to me at one point or another but I still care, still willing to trust now. ”

There is hurt in his face as he says this but also something else, a conflict of sorts. John wants to trust all of them, Bruce realizes that now but he is at odds with Bane and Talia and John is not sure who to trust more. Bruce wishes their connection was stronger but he is not sure of all of the history John has with the others, remembers how much love was in his voice when he spoke of them when he was young and that is hard to compete with. He stays silent for now as John says what he needs to. 

“ I know what happened in Gotham, everything they did, and I can’t change that but I can change what happens now. I know you don’t trust us but you are safe here, I won’t let them kill you.”

It pains Bruce to hear John say us, to know he considers himself part of Bane and Talia’s world, that he feels comfortable with them. It hurts enough that Bruce has to say something, has to let John know that he considers John separate from them. 

“I trust you, can’t trust them.”

He does trust John but he had trusted Talia before and that had been a mask, he can’t risk trusting her again. John’s eyes shine a bit in relief at hearing Bruce say that he trusts him and he speaks again, words almost pleading.

“I trust them and that will have to be enough for you right now.” 

He pulls himself away from Bruce at these words, take his hand and leads him to the bedding. Bruce lets John guide him there, sits down and takes the plate once again. He is not sure how to act around John now, wants to say something to get John to want to leave but if he says the wrong thing again, there is no guarantee that he will be able to see John again to repair the damage. As much as she doesn’t want to, he stays silent. 

“I have to go, need to talk to the others. I brought some books that you can read after you eat. I knows that there isn’t much to do right now. I will talk to you later.”

John starts to head towards the door, walking quickly. Bruce wants to keep him here but he is not sure how. He calls out to him, just his name but it makes him pause, turns towards Bruce and speak before he opens the door. 

“I’m not sure what is going to happen but I am going to do everything I can to keep everyone I care for safe.” 

It is a promise and with that John leaves him again. Bruce sits for just a moment before starting to eat. It does not take long until the food is finished and Bruce picks up one of the books that were left for him. It is nothing fancy, just a mystery book, but it means something to him. It is a sign that John wants him to have something to do besides brood here and so Bruce starts the book, tries to push other thoughts out of his mind and not dwell on what will happen when John returns.  
*^*^*^*^*  
'


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long to update. I hope people are still reading and will let me know what they think. This fic is so very long.

*^*^*^*^*  
John shuts the door behind him and he has the key to it in his pocket, is expected to lock it. He had seen the door unlocked, knew that Bruce is being watched and held here, but he had left both times he visited earlier before the door needed to be locked and hadn’t held the key either time. This had been the first visit that he had not been accompanied by someone else and he had been slightly surprised that the guard had made no argument about handing the key to him, letting him into the room, but he is sure that it is expected for the door to be locked. John can’t bring the key to the key hole, can’t lock Bruce up. The key goes back into his pocket.

“Will you be keeping the key then?”

The question comes from the man positioned outside the door, the one who gave him the key. John is still trying to get used to most of the men, is still learning their names, has mostly spent his time with Talia, Bane and Barsad. His tone is respectful, no anger or reproach in his voice, just a curiosity about whether the key is going with John or not. John just gives a nod, waits to see what the reaction will be.

“Very well, I will let the others know that you have it, that it is to remain unlocked.”

There is no debate, John’s nod being treated like a command. He wonders briefly if he could order the guards away from the door completely but he needs to talk to Talia about that first. He is choosing to trust her and he knows that he shouldn’t betray the trust she is giving him as well. For now, he gives a reason for taking the key and asks a question he has been wondering about. 

“There is no reason to keep it locked, he is no condition to leave. Has he been given any medical care?”

John has seen how stiffly Bruce moves right now, has seen all the bruises littering his body. He may need more than just rest to heal.

“He has not been very willing to accept anything from us. It can be offered but there is no guarantee that he will take it. Do you want someone to look him over?”

It is odd how John is being asked this, how there is no talk about Talia and Bane being consulted before anything can be done. He is sure that Bruce needs to be looked over but there are other things he needs to get figured out first. 

“That won’t be needed right now. Thank you.”  
He thinks about how Talia interacts with them, keeps his farewell polite, makes sure to get the guard’s name, and then he heads down the hall. This is the first time it has really dawned on him that those in the League may consider him a leader just as Talia does. It is a daunting thought and one he pushes out of his mind for now, focusing on what happened with Bruce instead. 

They had managed to talk, John had gotten a few answers but there is still more to know and he has no idea of their future. He feels so conflicted, glad to know that Bruce is alive but almost wishing he hadn’t come here. It had been easier to put aside what happened in Gotham, to focus on rebuilding his bond with Bane and Talia when he thought Bruce gone, when he had mourned for him. Now it is harder to accept that he made the right choice when Bruce is here alive and trying to convince John to leave here.

He is almost back to their chamber and he takes a moment to collect himself. He touches his lips briefly. John wonders if any of the other will notice them, how they must be red. The kiss wasn’t planned and but it still happened and John is not sure if he regrets it. It had been rougher than before, Bruce not holding back and it cements the fact that John still wants him. 

He isn’t sure that he should tell the others, if it would be considered cheating somehow. They haven’t really talked about how John slept with Bruce before everything happened, about what sort of relationship they expect out of John. He has a feeling that Bane may want a more physical relationship, that Talia wants to return to what they had in Gotham and that Barsad would be alright with it but it has not happened yet, just a few touches here and there, a few kisses. He knows they won’t push for anything he might be uncomfortable with but he has been theirs in in almost every way since coming with them and they may not want him doing things with others. He pushes the thought aside and enters the room. The others are already here and they look up as he enters. 

“John bird, did your visit go well?”

Talia’s voice is calm but she had not been happy earlier when they had shared their evening meal, when John had told them he was visiting Bruce alone. There had been a bit of an argument but it had passed quickly and now she makes room for him beside her. He can feel her eyes looks him over, all of their eyes really, for any sign that he is upset. John keeps his voice clam as he speaks. 

“It went better than the other visits. I don’t like him being trapped here.”

John has pulled the key out at his words, sets it down.

“I took it and your man at the door told me it wouldn’t be locked if I didn’t want it to be.” 

There is a look of irritation on Talia’s face at John’s words and she takes his hand.

“Our man. Your word holds as much weight as mine, as Bane’s. Did you order the guards away as well?”

Her question does not hold venom in it, more curiosity. He shakes his head no. 

“I wanted to talk to you about him before I did anything else. Is he just going to be kept here ?”

“We do not know yet, little bird. Wayne came and tried to take you, we cannot allow him to do such a thing again.”

Bane speaks, voice steady. Talia’s fingers rub circles on his hand and Barsad simply sits and listens. The words were not spoken with malice but John knows that they are not used to leaving enemies alive, to letting things go unpunished. He asks what he has been wondering the last few days. 

“You were going to kill him before I asked you not to. If he made a move against the League while he is here, if he tried to leave with me again, would you kill him even if I do not want you to?”

John needs to know, even if the answer may hurt. 

“Would you leave with him?”

Barsad’s question comes and John wonders if it is asked out of curiosity or to give Bane more time to think his words through. He answers it, very little hesitance even with all his doubts. 

“No, I made my choice to stay with you.”

Talia’s fingers squeeze his hand briefly at his reassurance. 

“You would look for me if I went with him, would bring me back.” 

He says these words a loud, gets a nod from Talia, a quiet yes from Bane. He knows that they intend on keeping him now that he is back with them, Talia’s words yesterday proof of that. John understands it, just wants to know what lines they are willing to cross. With this in mind, he asks the question again and Bane answers it.

“It would be easier if he was gone but I fear it may break you. We will not kill Wayne as long as you do not wish it. ”

Bane’s words fill him with relief, with hope that maybe everything will be ok. 

“As for his freedom, that is another issue. He needs to stay here till we are certain that there are not others coming, that he will not try to take you again. He can be free once we are certain of those things” 

John was expecting this and it would be alright but he is uncertain that Bruce will be willing to leave without him. That is something he would worry about later, right now he focuses on making sure things are better for Bruce. 

“I know that he has to stay here but I really don’t like him being under lock and key with guards watching his every move, never leaving that room. He can’t do much, his back is in bad shape. He needs medical attention, at least looked over.”

“Is that what you want, more care given to Wayne? He has hurt you but if you wish for kindness for him, it will be granted.”

Talia’s words are soft and he feels better after she says them. 

“John bird, we will look into care for Wayne tomorrow, you have our word.”

Bane reaches forward at his words, traces John’s lips with a finger, his eyes frowning slightly. It must feel slightly swollen from earlier. Bane keeps his finger upon John’s lips, rubs it just a little more. John can feel a blush color his cheeks and he knows that he won’t be able to hide the kiss from them now. 

“Was it freely given or taken?”

There is just a hint of rage in his voice and John can feel Talia’s hand tighten around his. Barsad has placed a hand upon Bane’s shoulder, a calming motion. John will not lie about this, not now, not to them. 

“I kissed him, he returned it. I didn’t feel forced, I just wanted to kiss him because I care for him and had thought him gone from my life. ”

There is a brief flash of jealousy in Bane’s eyes and Talia moves closer to him, touches as much of him as possible. She has always been possessive and he has always been protective. The only one who does not have much of a reaction to the news is Barsad, who doesn’t seem very surprised at the news. He is the one who speaks about it. 

“It is understandable. You were very close to Wayne before and in Gotham even without your memories, you were drawn to him, just as you were with Talia. Wayne has made an impact on you and it may be difficult to ignore that.”

Barsad’s words are truth and John simply nods at them. 

“A part of you is his.”

Talia’s words are a whisper spoken against his skin. She sounds a little sad but mostly resigned. Even with his reassurances, there is still a bit of worry in her voice and Bane has moved closer to them, placed a hand on John’s shoulder. The touch is warm and comforting and it makes John feel safe.

“Maybe but I’m yours, too.”

Talia kisses him after he says this, her lips so very soft. John loses himself in it, kisses back. It is different than how it was earlier with Bruce but it has always been different and John needs both. Bane’s hand squeezes his shoulder before letting go and John misses the touch. He does not dwell on it, focuses instead on the feeling of Talia’s mouth against his, and knows the others are watching. They end the kiss after a few moments but Talia still stays close to him, her body pressed up against his. 

“John bird, do you want me tonight?”

The question is asked so simply but John knows that Talia really wants the answer to be yes. They haven’t done more than a few kisses and touches since he came here and he knows that Bruce showing up has worried her, has made her want to draw him closer to her and not let him go. He thinks about what he wants for just a moment before deciding. He puts his hand in her hair, draws her closer. He doesn’t answer with words but with a kiss. 

*^*^*^*^*


	32. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So it has not been a great weekend but I have managed to get a chapter done. This is smut which I am always worried about how I write so please let me know what you think.

*^*^*^*^*  
Talia presses against John as much as she can, feels his warmth through his clothes. His kiss is eager and Talia responds to it, places a gentle bite to his bottom lip. It makes John let out a little moan, one that tells her it is sensitive right now. She tries not to think about why his lips are swollen, instead focusing on how he is hers in this moment, how he wants her. She ends the kiss after a moment, lets her hand rest on his thigh. His fingers are still in her hair and he strokes it as she leans towards him and speaks.

“It is a yes then?”

She smiles at him, voice teasing. Her fingers move from his thigh to his crotch, brushes against the hardness starting to form. He is much more used to her touch now but he still blushes just a bit at it. She is charmed by it. It has been a while since her touch has been so bold, wanting to give him time to be comfortable with her again, but tonight she wants him and so she keeps her hand there, rubbing him slowly. After their time in Gotham, she knows just what sort of touch he likes and she gives it to him, takes a few moments to work him to a stiffness. Soon he is bucking up into her touch just a bit and she knows that he is hers tonight.

“Always so eager.”

She moves her hand away from him and he claims her mouth again, pulls her closer so that their bodies are flush, so that she can feel just what affect her teasing has had. She can hear the others move near them and she knows John hears it as well because he stops his kiss, stills her movements and looks to the others. He looks a little embarrassed, a bit unsure about something. 

“We can return later.”

Bane’s words are clear but he does not leave the room yet, stands at the foot of the bedding, Barsad beside him. Bane’s eyes are on both of them and she can tell he wants to watch, has thought about the sight of them together like this before. She would have him stay, Barsad as well but she knows that he wants John to decide. John is still next to her and she leans to him, speaks softly.

“They can stay, John bird, if you want. I know there are things you like that I cannot give you but they can, if you are ready.”

This will all be his choice but she wants him to know that he is theirs, that they are all his, that he does not need to go to Wayne for anything he may want, may need. He is looking over to them and she can feel his nervousness. It is just a moment and then he gives them all an answer.

“You both should stay. I’m not sure what will happen but I do not mind you being here, watching.” 

His cheeks are turning red but his voice sounds sure. It is not quite a yes that he wants more than just her but Talia still smiles at his answer, gives him another quick kiss. 

“Do you wish to put on a show?”

She teases the words against his lips, and he gives her a gentle bite at them. Bane and Barsad have sat down again, are turned towards them, shoes off, a sign that they plan to stay the evening. Talia does not mind having their eyes on her and she goes about what she wants, which right now is to have her little bird bare. She makes quick work of his shirt but lets him remove everything else. He is not covered by anything soon and he moves to her, helps her take off her own clothes. 

“It is no fun if I am the only one naked.” 

His voice is just a bit teasing and she is glad that he is somewhat relaxed in front of them and it is not just directed to her, is an invention for the others as well if they want to take it. This is a big step and she wonders briefly if some of it is for their sake, to reassure them. She does not think about that for long, puts her hands on John again. He is hers, theirs, and she will not let doubts plague her now that he is allowing her to claim him again. 

“There is no reason to rush, we have time.”

She tells him this, wants it to go slow tonight. In Gotham, there had always been a hurry to everything they did, an urgency. John had been so unsure in the beginning and even once he was alright with the idea of it, there just wasn’t much time to take. Now, they can explore properly and it seems her boy knows this. 

He is touching her, letting his fingers linger over her skin. He touches the marks upon her body, the few scars she carries. She smiles at his touch, how gentle and almost reverent it is and she leans back into the bedding, finds a pillow being place under her by Bane. He does not touch her but he stays beside the pillow, his fingers resting lightly on the edge of it. Barsad stays a little further away, simply watches. John’s hands do not still in their movements but she can see his eyes glance to Bane, to Barsad before looking back at her. It was a glance of curiosity and Talia wonders how long it will take for John to accept them as well.

Her thoughts are caught off as his hand grasps her breast, thumb stroking across her nipple. Talia leans up for a kiss again, a soft one at first, and she puts her hands on the back of his neck, leads him down with her. His hand still massages her breast but their bodies are so close now, so much of their skin touching. The pillow beneath her shifts just a bit, Bane’s fingers curling in it.

“Lovely.”

Bane whispers it and Talia takes it as an encouragement, wraps her legs around the back of John’s. They stay like this for a while, bodies close together but no penetration, not yet, but touching and exploring. She likes how they are laying, enjoys how her little bird is responding to her lips trailing down his neck, the moan she receives when her teeth scrape just a bit. It is permission or she takes it as such and her mouth stays on his neck, bites it and sucks a mark upon it like she did in Gotham. There is no way it can be hidden and she likes the idea of Wayne seeing it tomorrow, of knowing that she put it there and John allowed it. 

“Our little bird.”

She whispers it against the mark she just placed, smiles when she feels his head nod against her shoulder. His lips are against her skin, his hands now settled against her hips and he is kissing against her collarbone. He won’t leave as many marks, has never been quite as possessive as she is but she wants to feel his claim and so she raise her hips up, rubs against him roughly. It has the effect she wants, her little bird griping her hips to steady her movements, his fingers squeezing there. In the morning, there should be little marks on her skin. 

Bane’s fingers are still clutching the pillow and she can hear just a bit of an intake of his breath through the mask. He wants them and she is sure that Barsad does as well but the need may be greater for Bane. She wants him with them now but knows it needs to be built up to. It is time to see if their bird is warming up to the idea of their protector joining them.  
“So sweet for me, John, so very sweet, they can see it as well. Our protector wants us, I can tell, can you see it as well?”

Her words make John glance over to Bane and there is a sharp breath taken and there is a flush coloring his cheeks. He doesn’t say anything and so she continues to move against him, to ask him another question. 

“I want him , want you. Can I have you both tonight?”

“Together?”

The word is spoken with a bit of hesitation but not fear. She gives him another kiss before answering.

“If you are alright with it. I could be on top of you and he on the other side of me. It would be enjoyable, to be surrounded by you both.”

“That might be nice.”  
His words are said softly and she wonders how much more she can get from him tonight. It would be nice between them, is something she has done with Bane and Barsad before. There is something that she thinks would be sweeter. Her hand trails down his back, grips his bottom. She squeezes it before moving her finger to the cleft of it, just rests it there. 

“Talia.”

She likes the way he says her name, how he has stiffened just slightly. She rubs her finger there, doesn’t put it inside.

“Or you could be in between, let us take care of you.”

His hands are once again tight around her hips and his breathing is much quicker now. He is excited by the idea, even if he is nervous. 

“It is your choice, John bird.”  
Bane speaks, his fingers finally leaving the pillow. He is looking at John and Talia waits for John’s answer, knows that Bane is as well. John’s hands leave her and he is sitting up, looking at all of them.

“I think I want that.”

It is said softly and Talia smiles at him, sits up and kisses him slowly. He pulls away from her after a moment, speaks. 

“I need to get prepped.”

The words are almost shy. Barsad gets up, brings over what is needed as Bane takes off his clothes. John gives thanks. Talia turns to Barsad, gives him a kiss.

“Is there anything you want?”

It is not their intention to push him aside now that they have their little bird back. Barsad gives her a soft kiss at her question, smiles at her.

“I am content to watch. There will be other times, this should be yours this first time.”

She gives him another kiss at his words, is grateful that he understands how much they need this. He settles down a little bit away from them on the bedding and she goes back to John and Bane, props herself against the pillows and gestures to her boys. 

John comes to her, rubs a finger against her cunt. They have not done this often but he always takes care to make sure she is wet enough, that she is ready. She stills his hand, tells him that she is ready, wants to watch them get ready. He takes a shaky breath and nods, grabs the lube but Bane places his hands over John’s. 

“ If it will help, I can do it. I will be gentle.”

Bane’s words are spoken gently, giving their bird a chance to give permission. John is a little nervous but he gives the lube to Bane, who comes closer to John, sits him so that he can reach between his legs. He slicks his fingers and gets ready to ease one into him.

“Let me know if it is too much and we can stop.”

Bane says these words as he puts a finger in. John squirms a bit at the intrusion but not away from it.

“You won’t hurt me.”

John’s voice is steady and Talia smiles at the trust in it. It reassures their protector and he continues to prep John, to loosen their little bird. Talia watches, touches herself to get ready. Soon it is time and she helps her little bird get ready for her, like how he eases into her. 

This is different than Gotham, he is not bare inside her this time. There hadn’t been time to get protection and Talia did not see it as necessary but it makes her little bird feel better now to have it. They start a rhythm, exchanges kisses for a few moments until Bane comes up behind them and she can see him wrap a hand around himself, gets ready for their little bird. 

“Are you certain, little bird?”

Bane asks this as he comes closer to them and Talia knows it is to give John one more chance to back away from this if it is too much. 

“I am sure.”

John’s words are said and he positions himself so that Bane can join them. He does not pull out of her and Talia lifts herself up as Bane guides himself into John. There is a bit of a gasp as John is filled up and it takes a few moments for him to adjust and he is still as he does so. Talia wraps her legs around them both, whispers to John as she does so.

“It feels good, little bird?”

It gets her a quiet yes and then soon they are moving, a slow pace at first. She can feel when Bane thrusts into John, it drives him deeper into her. She watches their faces, enjoys seeing the pleasure that this is causing. This is how it should have been, the three of them and she is glad that they are finally getting the chance for it. 

It does not take long for John to come, he is almost overwhelmed by it all and the noises escaping him are wonderful. He is pressed up against her and it takes only a few moments before she finds her own release and her sounds mix with John and it is this that helps Bane to find his own. 

They are all spent Bane is the first to move, gently pulling out of John. John eases out of her and goes to throw the condom away. He returns quickly and Talia has him lay next to her. They do not talk as they clean themselves with the water that Barsad brings them, there is no need for words. It does not take long for them to be ready for sleep and she holds John tightly as they both drift away. 

*^*^*^*^*


	33. Chapter 33

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't had a comment for a while but I promise I am starting to figure out how to end this. Please enjoy and thanks for sticking with this for so long.

*^*^*^*^*  
Bane walks through the compound, going to a room that he has not visited since its newest occupant was placed there. It is early morning and the others are getting a doctor to look over Wayne but Bane wanted time to speak to Wayne alone . He had told them about it, did not want John to worry. He had assured him that he only wanted to speak, would not attack Wayne unless he attacked first. It is a promise he will keep. 

Wayne is not facing the door as Bane enters, has a book open in his lap. No doubt the book is a gift from John, just another sign that their little bird cares for this man. Despite what John has told them, about what Wayne had done for him during his time captured by Ra’s, it is still difficult for Bane to think of Wayne as more than the man who stole and hid John from them. He pushes those thoughts aside as he enters the room fully, shuts the door behind him and starts to approach Wayne. 

Wayne closes the book, looks up as Bane gets closer. His face is a blank mask for the most part, but there is displeasure in his eyes as they glance to Bane. His body is stiff as he gets up but he does not move away as Bane gets closer, stands his ground.

“Are you here to kill me?”

There is no fear in Wayne’s question and he faces Bane. If only that was how they could be rid of him, if only his death would not hurt their little bird so much, than Bane would do it without hesitance. 

“ No, Mr. Wayne. I simply wish to talk for a few moments before John comes to visit you again.”

He gestures for Wayne to sit down again at his words but the man does not. 

“I am not in a particularly chatty mood today.”

Bane expects this defiance, Wayne’s reluctance to talk. There is no rush for the information, Wayne will not be going anywhere till they are certain that he poses no more threat, that John will be willing to let him go. 

“You can just listen then. You are here for the foreseeable future after all, there will be time for us to find out what we need to know later.”

These words are a reminder for Wayne, to let him know that he has very little power here.

“We were ready to move on from you, Mr. Wayne. You had been assumed dead and John mourned you, was ready to let go of everything that happened in Gotham.”

Bane walks around the room as he speaks, can feel Wayne’s eyes on him the whole time. He makes his way to Wayne’s bedding, to the book. He picks it up, looks it over before facing Wayne again.

“He was ready to start his life with us, the one that was denied us all for a long time, but you could not let him go.”

“You forced him to come here, I came here to give him a chance to choose without a threat hanging over his head.”

Wayne’s words are full of anger and he steps closer to Bane, not touching but not leaving much space between them.

“A choice that you were going to give him by drugging him and dragging him away from us ? Were you going to take him to Gotham and discard him once you were there like you did before?”

That is what Bane hates Wayne for the most, the fact that he did not see fit to stay in John’s life, to take care of him but still feels he has some sort of claim on John. He had avoided him for many years and once John showed up at his door, he took John’s affection as if he had the right to it, as if he had not abandoned John to the city. He does not give Wayne a chance to speak, continues after his questions. 

“ It does not matter what you planned, why you came here. John has chosen us, will stay with us.”

“Because he feels he has no choice, has to keep you in check.”

Wayne voice is harsh and his words are a doubt that Bane has had before. He pushes it aside. 

“Our little one belongs by our side, he knows this. There is nothing that you can give him that we cannot, no need of his we cannot see to.”

Bane thinks to tell Wayne of last night, to let the man understand just how much John is theirs but he does not want to. Last night had been a sweet claiming of their John Bird and is too much of a treasure to use as a way to hurt Wayne. Beside the man will figure it out soon enough. Bane continues to speak as Wayne stands near him. 

“He is safe with us, content. You will see and if you can accept it, then there will be no more need to keep you here.”

Wayne looks disbelieving at his words, is about to say something when noises near the door pull his attention away. The door opens and John is there, food on a tray with him. His eyes look over both of them as he comes closer and he looks pleased to see no fresh marks on either of them.

“You managed not to fight.” 

There is just a bit of relief in his voice. Bane moves closer to him but keeps his eyes on Wayne, can see when the other man notices the mark on John’s neck. Wayne’s eyes narrow just a bit and there is jealousy there. 

“I am going to eat here, the others are waiting for you. I just want a little bit of time here alone.”

Bane would prefer not to leave John with Wayne but they have talked about this and he knows it is needed to reassure John. He has said some of what he has needed to say to Wayne and so it will do no harm to leave.

“Very well.”  
He turns to John before he leaves, runs a finger over his lips. A little blush colors his cheeks and Bane finds it sweet. He gives one more glance to Wayne, can see how the man tenses at the gesture before he leaves the room. 

*^*^*^*^*  
It is just Bruce and him now and John can feel Bruce’s eyes still watching him, knows that he can see Talia’s mark on his neck, saw Bane’s version of a kiss. He may have to talk about it soon but there are other things that need to be talked about first. John puts his tray down and then turns to Bruce.

“There will be a doctor coming in a bit. He is not associated with the League. Will you let him look you over?”

Bruce doesn’t say anything. John moves closer to him, touches his shoulder. 

“Your back needs to be looked over. Please just let me make sure you are alright.”

Bruce moves his hand to John’s hand on his shoulder, strokes his fingers across it. 

“ As long as you are there, I will get checked out.”

John is relieved by this, takes his hand off of Bruce’s shoulder. He goes to the bedding, sets and grabs a bowl from the tray, gestures for Bruce to do the same. Bruce takes the bowl from him, sits down gently. 

“I brought breakfast, you might want to eat while it is still warm.”

The next few moments are quiet, the two of them beginning to eat. Bruce speaks after a moment, keeps his voice quiet.

“The door wasn’t locked last night. Was that your doing?”

The question is spoken almost casually but John can feel Bruce’s curiosity. 

“I took the key. Did you think of running?”

John needs to know if Bruce is going to try to escape. If he does before Talia and Bane feel comfortable letting him go, John is not sure what will happen. 

“There were still guards and I am not leaving without you.”

“I don’t plan to leave.”

Bruce’s face tightens at his words, his fingers griping his bowl a little tighter. 

“That is what Bane told me as well. Did he put that mark on your neck or did Talia?”

There is a bit of hurt in Bruce’s voice, a bit of accusation as well. John brushes it aside, knows it will not do either of them any good if they start to argue about this. 

“Talia and it was my choice just as it was my choice to kiss you yesterday.”

Bruce sets his bowl down, leans a little closer to John. He puts his hand up to John’s throat and when John does not move it away, his fingers brush against the bruise there. It is a soft touch, John can barely feel the warmth of his fingers but it makes him take a deep breath. 

“ Do you love them, John?”

Bruce asks this, fingers still on John’s throat. He seems so still now, waits for John’s answer. He tells Bruce the truth. 

“Yes, I always have.”

Bruce’s fingers move at his words and there is a flash of pain in his eyes. John says his next words quickly, needs Bruce to understand.

“But they aren’t the only ones I care for like that.”

Bruce’s fingers go back to his throat at those softly spoken words, curl around it and soon John finds his head being pulled forward, his mouth being claimed by Bruce’s. It is different than the kisses in Gotham, but also different to the kiss they shared yesterday, urgent but not as rough as it had been. John responds to it, moves his body closer to Bruce’s. They pull apart after a few moments but Bruce keeps his hand on John’s neck, fingers on Talia’s mark.

“I’m doing what I can to make things better. Everything is complicated.”

John says this after a moment, can feel Bruce’s fingers stroking his throat. 

“I know.”

Bruce is looking at him as he says this and then there is quiet for a few moments. The quiet is interrupted by a knock at the door. John gets up, Bruce’s fingers finally moving from his neck. It is one of the men telling him the doctor is here. He nods, goes back to Bruce. 

“It is time to get you looked over. Can you walk to the room where he is or do you need him to come here?”

John is sure that Bruce is feeling cooped up, wants to give him a chance to be somewhere other than this room. Bruce gets up.

“I can walk.”

John goes with him to the door and soon they are on their way to where the doctor is waiting. Bruce walks right next to him, close enough that they are touching. They stay like this the whole way and when they enter the room, Talia is there with the doctor. She notices their closeness but does not say anything. When the exam starts, she moves next to John, stands just as close to him as Bruce had, puts a claiming hand on his back. John lets her, knows she needs the reassurance .

*^*^*^*^*


	34. Chapter 34

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another update. I think this will end up being somewhere between 40 and 45 chapters, just to give people a heads up.

*^*^*^*^*  
The exam had been done quickly. It had not been the most comfortable experience. Bruce had been fine with John being there but Talia being there as well had made him apprehensive. He did not want her to see his back, to know what sort of shape he is in. He said nothing about it, did not want to possibly start a fight in front of John. He stayed silent but he made glances to where she stood beside John a little bit away as the doctor looked him over. 

Talia touched John the whole time, her arm wrapped around him, hand on his back. It was a sign of possession, as much a claim as the mark upon John’s neck, as Bane’s finger against John’s lips had been. She would occasionally say something to John, leaning even closer to him so that it could not be overheard by him. John did not move away from her, seemed comfortable around her just as he had been with Bane earlier and it made jealousy rise in Bruce.

John has chosen us, will stay with us.

Bane’s words echoed in his head through the whole exam, repeated every time John leaned into Talia, when Bruce would see the mark upon his neck. Even now as the doctor has finished up and is packing up and telling Bruce what shape his back is in, those words and the ones John spoke earlier are what Bruce finds his thoughts focusing on. 

Bruce knows John cares for him but it had been different to hear him confess. It had been so easy to kiss him then, to pretend for just a moment that maybe he could have a chance for something he thought lost with Rachael, but watching him with Talia shatters those hopes. 

“ Would you like anything for the pain?”

The doctor’s words pull Bruce’s attention away from his thoughts and he shakes his head. It doesn’t matter if they would allow him to have it, he does not want to risk taking any pain killers here. 

John moves closer at the doctor’s words, Talia right beside him. He looks at Bruce when he shakes his head but does not comment on it. Instead, he turns to the doctor, asks if there is anything Bruce needs to do to make his back stronger, to ease the pain.

The doctor speaks for a few moments with them about what will help, what Bruce needs to do to improve his back. John listens, asks questions. Most of Bruce’s attention is focused on him, some of it on the doctor’s words, and some on Talia standing next to John. She does not ask questions and she returns Bruce’s glances with her own, her arm still around John. Her gaze shift to the door after a moment and Bruce glances that way as well, sees Barsad entering. He gives a nod to Talia and comes closer to them, a reminder of just how outnumbered Bruce is here. 

The doctor has finished his instructions, doesn’t seem to notice the tension in the room. He starts to gather his things, turns to Bruce once again. 

“I would like to look you over again.” 

This is spoken to Bruce and he wonders how much the doctor knows, if he has any idea that Bruce is not here by choice. He has thought about letting him know somehow but it may just put the man in danger, could put John in danger.

“That can be arranged. How soon?” John asks, drawing the doctor’s attention to him. Bruce watches as John as the doctor tells him that he wants to check Bruce over in a few weeks, sooner if there are changes. Bruce wonders if he will be here that long, if he will ever leave here.

“John and I will see you out, Doctor.”

It is the first time Talia has spoken to someone other than John since Bruce entered the room. She also finally removes her arm from around John, turns to the doctor and starts to lead him to the door. John takes a moment to look over at Bruce, tells him he will see him soon, and then follows Talia and the doctor out of the room, leaving Bruce alone with Barsad. A few moments pass, neither man saying anything and no other guards coming.

Barsad stands, simply looks over at Bruce but makes no gesture to take him out of the room yet. He is calm, just as he has been every time Bruce has seen him since being captured. He is the one Bruce hasn’t quite figured out yet, knows now that he had been working with Bane and Talia during his time in the League but does not quite understand what his place is with the others. 

“Are you here to drag me back to my cell and lock me up again?”

Bruce moves closer as he asks this, a part of him wanting to see if he can rile up the man’s calm. Bruce knows everything is stacked against him right now but he has never done well when his back is against the wall. 

“Do you miss your room already, Mr. Wayne?”

Barsad raises an eyebrow, question almost causal. He is still just standing, arms crossed in front of him, pose nonthreatening. It irritates Bruce, that after everything in Gotham they are simply keeping him here, have made no real move to harm him.

“It is not my room.”

Barsad cocks his head slightly, not quite a smirk on his face as he speaks again.  
“It was the one Ra’s gave you when you first came here and it is where you sleep now. It wasn’t always yours but the previous owner sleeps elsewhere so it is yours by default.”

“Oh, who slept in it before me?”

It doesn’t really matter, he had never thought about who had that room before him but Barsad’s words have made him just a bit curious. 

“Talia did.”

It is not Barsad who answers, instead John has reentered the room, Talia no longer with him. He continues speaking as he moves closer to where Bruce and Barsad stand. 

“It was her room, mine was across the hall. Ra’s gave it to you after we came back here so that he could train you.”

There is just a small hitch in his voice when he says Ra’s name but there is no other sign of distress as he continues speaking.

“I can see if there is another room available if you want, if it brings back too many memories.” John sounds so earnest, is really trying to make the situation better for Bruce. He isn’t sure what to say, is thrown off by John offering him a choice and Barsad saying nothing to it. He just stays silent for a moment and John starts to move even closer, is right next to him now. 

“It doesn’t really matter where I sleep here.”

John shrugs a bit, an agreement of sorts with Bruce’s words. It would be such a simple thing to touch him right now and so Bruce does without even thinking about it, just reaches forward and wraps his hand around John’s wrist. The skin is soft there and Bruce can feel John’s pulse. He rubs his fingers along it, enjoys touching John. He wants to touch him more now after seeing Talia do so earlier, wants to claim a piece of John for himself. 

“Do you want to take a walk? We can talk some more, give you a chance to move some more.” 

John asks this, a little bit of hesitance in his voice as he looks over at Bruce. He gives him a nod, a yes and John gives a small smile at it. He still has a hold of John’s wrist and John moves it out of Bruce’s hold, takes a hold of Bruce’s hand. 

“ I will let Talia know that you will be a little late for training today.”

It is all Barsad says before he leaves them but the mention of Talia is just enough to make Bruce squeezes John’s hand. John just nods at Barsad as he leaves and then leads Bruce out of the room.

They go outside, the air still cool up here even though it is late spring now, turning into summer. He walks next to John, the path familiar as they make their way around the compound, near the lake. They are left alone but there are others around, keeping an eye, another reminder that Bruce is trapped.

“We took walks around here sometimes before, do you remember?”

The question comes a few minutes into their walk. It is obvious that John wants to talk about before and Bruce has tried not to think about that time too much. Maybe he should face it, help John face it and then perhaps John may change his choice.

“Yes. We couldn’t do it very often, you were watched all the time. I was told that it was for your protection. I trusted him because I thought I could, because I thought that he cared for.”

He does not say his name, they both know that he is talking about Ra’s. 

“He did but he got twisted around.” 

John’s voice is sad and Bruce moves closer to him. 

“How did you end up with him, with Talia? You spoke about it but not all of it, never even told me real names.”

Bruce only knows pieces, bits of information gathered from different sources. He wants to hear it from John now that he is free to talk about it. 

“Talia found me running to the boy’s home. She knocked me down and sat on top of me. Her hair was so short and she was so small even though she was a bit older than me. I had never seen anyone like her before and so I took her hand and she promised to take care of me. I believed her more than anyone who said those words before.”

There is such affection in his voice as he tells Bruce more, as he speaks about going with Talia. He tells Bruce about his first year with her, when it was just them and Ra’s, how it was like having a family again. He tells him about Bane being taken out of the pit, how they all three trained together, how Ra’s started to change.

“He didn’t like to talk about the pit, about what Talia went through there. I think he hated Bane because he was a reminder of it. He started to try to separate the three of us and when we were still trying to spend time with Bane, he sent Talia away for something, the first time he only sent one of us away. I was taken from my room that night, taken somewhere else. It was months before he brought me back here, months of not knowing what happened to them. ”

They are by the lake now and John’s voice starts to shake a bit as he talks about what happened before Bruce met him. Bruce wraps an arm around him. 

“I know that they wouldn’t leave me. I had always been afraid that I would be sent away when I first came here, that Talia would grow bored of me. That never happened, she always reassured me that I was safe with her, took care of me, and I knew that Bane would always look out for both of us.”

There is no hesitation in his voice when he speaks about them taking care of him, just as it had been when he was a boy. Bruce can understand how hard it is to let go of the idea of someone you care about, to realize how different they may be from what you thought. He went through it with Ra’s and he has to get John to understand that it may be the same with Bane and Talia.

“You told me about them before, I could always hear how much you cared for them. People can change, John, you said Ra’s did. The people you told me about, your dew drop and protector, they are not the same as the ones who came to Gotham, who held a city hostage.”

John tenses next to him but he doesn’t move away from Bruce, turns to look at him instead.

“I know that. They thought I was lost. They were angry, so very angry. We both know that kind of anger. It can change people.”

“John…”

He doesn’t get anything other than his name out before John is placing a finger against his lips, silencing him before he continues.

“They had no one to lash out at but you and Gotham. They wanted you to suffer so they put you in the pit, hurt the city. They aren’t going to punish you for that anymore, they promised me. They aren’t the same as they were before but they are different from how they were in Gotham, deserve a chance to be more than what they were there. ” 

He looks sad and hopeful all at once right now and all Bruce can do is hold him, keep him close for this moment. He is done with talking about this for now and Bruce doesn’t push him for more right now. John brushes his lips against Bruce’s, a small kiss ,a sign of affection. Bruce returns the kiss. 

“I need to head back, we can talk more later.”

John moves away from Bruce after he says this, takes his hand and starts to lead him back to the compound. Bruce isn’t sure he wants to go back but he does not want to risk running, to risk leaving John and so he walks with him back.

As they get closer, Bruce sees Talia in the courtyard. She is sparring with Barsad, Bane watching them both. Bane’s attention is drawn away from the session in front of him, is instead drawn to Bruce and John. He raises from his seat, approaches them.

“Are you staying out here, Mr. Wayne?”

The question is spoken clearly. Bane gives a glance to their joined hands and there is a bit of jealousy in his eyes. Bruce does not let go of John’s hands. 

“Talia and I are going to spar, we do it almost every day. Do you want to watch?”

The question is spoken with a tiny bit eagerness, John looking excited at the idea about showing off to Bruce. He finds himself agreeing to watch and he settles down on the ground a bit away from Bane. Something seems to be shifting with how he is being treated and he is not sure what it means. 

*^*^*^*^*


End file.
